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Large In Charge Magazine - Five Years on the Net!

 Issue #62 - May 2009

Welcome to LargeInCharge Magazine

In this Issue of L.I.C.

 

 

Raqui's Spot -  with our Founder Raqui

 

Big Girls on the Red Carpet  ~ Cher Rue

Super Sized Sounds  ~ SUPERSIZED SPANISHFLY LYNX

From the Plus Side ~ Emily Smiltneck

Good 4 U Food  ~ Xander

 

DID YOU KNOW?  ~ Iolande Argent

National & International Plus Sized News

 

Hot & Heavy Entertainment ~ Stephanie Baham

 

The Big GB My Gastric Bypass Memoirs - Soyna Bennett

 

CONFESSIONS - Let It Go and Confess!

Fashion Furious - Fashion Finds with Plus Size style.

Product of the Month - Products for People of Size

 

LargeInChargeDating - Dating for the Large People who are going to be in Charge of their Love Lives!

 

LargeInCharge Friends - The Place for Big People to make Friends and maybe MUCH MORE!

Feature of the Month

Candye Kane

Still the Toughest Girl Alive!

 

Candye Kane -Still the Toughest Girl Alive!

Provided By: Candye Kane

 

“The Toughest Girl Alive” is the name of Candyes’ original song and the title of her soon to be released memoir and stage play. It is also an apt description of the jump blues singer and songwriter from East Los Angeles who has earned this moniker the hard way. Nominated for a 2008 National Blues Foundation Award for Best Blues Contemporary Female (the highest honor for blues artists) and beating down pancreatic cancer the same year, Kane is one tough cookie. She has performed worldwide for presidents and movie stars, but her path to success was not always glamorous or easy.

 

Raised in a dysfunctional, blue-collar family, Candye became a teenage mother, a pin up cover girl and a punk rock, hillbilly and blues-belting anarchist by the time she was just 21 years old.  Eight cds, six record labels, millions of international road miles and countless awards later, Miss Kane has proven to be a true survivor as she scrambled her way to the top of the roots music heap, creating a world renowned reputation that has spanned two decades.

 

A colorful mixture of the traditional and the eclectic, Kane cut her musical teeth in the early 80’s onstage with Hollywood musicians and friends, Social Distortion, Dwight Yoakum, Dave Alvin, The Blasters, X, Fear and Los Lobos, to name just a few. While raising two sons, this role model for the disenfranchised, championed large sized women, fought for the equal rights of sex workers and the GLBT community and inspired music lovers everywhere. Her fans are a mixture of true outsiders: bikers, blues fans, punk rockers, drag queens, fat girls, queers, burlesque dancers, porn fans, sex workers, rockabilly and swing dancers, grey haired hippies, sex positive feminists and everyday folk of all ages, flock to see Candye and hear her musical messages of love, hope and empowerment.

 

Kanes’ live shows are the stuff of legend. She honors the bold blues women of the past with both feet firmly planted in the present. She belts - growls - shouts - croons and moans from a lifetime of suffering and overcoming obstacles. She uses music as therapy and often writes and chooses material with positive affirmations that leave the audience feeling healed and exhilarated. A show that is part humor, revival meeting and sexuality celebration, she'll deliver a barrelhouse-tongue-in-cheek blues tune or a gospel ballad like Jesus and Mohammed, encouraging audiences to leave behind religious intolerance. She’ll slay the crowd with her balls out rendition of Whole Lotta Love or glorify the virtues of zaftig women with 200 pounds of fun. She often says she is a "fat black drag queen trapped in a white woman's body" and she dresses the part. Bedecked in bright colored feathers, sequins and rhinestones, Kane's performance is Mississippi by way of Las Vegas with a quick stopover in San Francisco.

 

Her last release, (RUF 2007) Guitar’d and Feathered, garnered rave reviews worldwide and earned her a West Coast Songwriting award for Best Original Blues composition. Kane will go into the studio again in 2009, to record her ninth cd for premiere West Coast blues label, Delta Groove. The cd will feature her smoking live band that includes 26 year old guitar virtuoso Laura Chavez, Kanes’ eldest son, Evan Caleb on drums and bass veteran, Paul Loranger. This newest effort will be chock full of the songs of triumph that have made Kane a favorite with enlightened congregations everywhere.

 

Candye has been included in countless Blues and Jazz Anthologies including the Rolling Stone and Musichounds Guide to Jazz and Blues and Dan Akroyds’ 30 Essential Women of the Blues. In addition to her music successes, she is an activist and philanthropist. In August 2008, she appeared in Cape Town, South Africa for the World Congress for people with disabilities with her United by Music show for special needs kids (www.unitedbymusic.eu). This project provides performance opportunities, blues history lessons and songwriting instruction to young people with disabilities, encouraging them to write their own blues songs to help them overcome their daily challenges.

 

Candye is a fighter par excellence and her authenticity, determination and optimism are what keep her shows passionate, honest and irresistible. One evening with Candye will keep the crowds happy, hopeful and coming back for more!

Interview with Candye Kane

 

LargeInCharge.com: What is your name (Real and name used for Artistic Expression)?

MY LEGAL NAME IS CANDICE LOUISE KANE AND HAS BEEN MY WHOLE LIFE.



LargeInCharge.com: Where are you originally from and where is your
home now?

I WAS BORN IN VENTURA CALIFORNIA AND RAISED IN LOS ANGELES, MOSTLY CYPRESS PARK AND HIGHLAND PARK IN NORTHEAST LOS ANGELES FROM THE TIME I WAS 3 YEARS OLD. I LIVE IN OCEANSIDE (NORTH SAN DIEGO COUNTY) NOW AND HAVE LIVED THERE SINCE 1986.



LargeInCharge.com: Are you what most would consider a person of size?

I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN LARGE SIZED EVER SINCE I STARTED PUBERTY. I HAVE ALWAYS HAD LARGE BREASTS AND ALWAYS FELT LIKE THE REST OF MY BODY WAS FIGHTING TO CATCH UP. THOUGH I HAVE RECENTLY LOST 100 POUNDS BECAUSE OF MY BOUT WITH PANCREATIC CANCER AT THE BEGINNING OF 2008, I AM STILL A SIZE 12 AND STILL CONSIDERED LARGE SIZED BY THE NARROW AMERICAN FASHION WORLD. I STILL HAVE MY LANE BRYANT CREDIT CARD.


LargeInCharge.com: Your performances are unique though very well known, Please tell us what you do?

I AM A SINGER/ SONGWRITER AND VOCALIST. I HAVE RECORDED NINE INTERNATIONALLY RELEASED CDS FOR LABELS SUCH AS ROUNDER, SIRE, ANTONES, RUF AND NOW DELTA GRO OVE.


LargeInCharge.com: What made you get into this line of work?

I WAS BORN A SINGER AND ALWAYS KNEW THATS WHAT I WAS MEANT TO DO.


LargeInCharge.com: How long have you been performing?

I PERFORMED AS A CHILD ON THE GONG SHOW, THE TED MACK AMATEUR HOUR AND IN COMMUNITY THEATER AND CHURCH PRODUCTIONS. I HAVE BEEN MAKING A LIVING TOURING WORLDWIDE SINCE 1992.


LargeInCharge.com: What was your original occupation and what other things have you done over the years?

I WAS A TEENAGE MOTHER AND TO SUPPORT MYSELF, TOOK A VARIETY OF OCCUPATIONS. I WORKED AS A SECRETARY, PBX OPERATOR, RETAIL CLERK AND PHONE SEX GIRL. FROM MY PHONE SEX JOB, I MET ANNIE SPRINKLE AND CANDY SAMPLES AND BEGAN WORKING AS A TOPLESS MODEL AND STRIPPER. SEX WORK EMANCIPATED ME FINANCIALLY, HELPED ME GET OFF WELFARE AND ALLOWED ME TO HIRE GOOD MUSICIANS TO PLAY WITH ME AND GO IN THE STUDIO AND MAKE DEMOS. I WAS ON THE COVER OR FEATURED IN HUNDREDS OF MENS MAGAZINES AND MADE A NAME FOR MYSELF SIMULTANEOUSLY IN SEX WORK AND IN MUSIC. I WORKED AS A SEX WORKER AND A LARGE SIZED TOPLESS MODEL FOR FOUR YEARS BETWEEN
1982 AND 1986. I AM CURRENTLY FEATURED IN THE TASCHEN COFFEE TABLE BOOK - THE BIG BOOK OF BREASTS



LargeInCharge.com: Tell us about your first performance and how it has grown since then?

IM SORRY. I DONT REMEMBER MY FIRST PERFORMANCE


LargeInCharge.com: Would you say you are a popular performer?

I GUESS SO. I HAVE BEEN NOMINATED FOR A NATIONAL BLUES FOUNDATION AWARD (HANDY) FOR BEST CONTEMPORARY BLUES FEMALE IN 2008. I WON THE TROPHEES DE FRANCE AWARD FOR BEST INTERNATIONAL CHANTEUSE IN PARIS FRANCE IN 2003. I HAVE WON BEST BLUES BAND EIGHT TIMES BY THE SAN DIEGO MUSIC AWARDS; BEEN NAMED ONE OF LOS ANGELES'S MOST INFLUENTIAL PEOPLE BY BUZZ MAGAZINE, WON BEST FEMALE VOCALIST FROM THE LA WEEKLY MUSIC AWARDS, WON BEST CABARET SWING ARTIST FROM THE CALIFORNIA MUSIC AWARDS, WON BEST OUT SONG BY THE GAY LESBIAN MUSIC AWARDS AND MANY MANY MORE. I AM MENTIONED IN THE ROLLING STONE MAGAZINE GUIDE TO JAZZ AND BLUES AND I AM ON THE HOUSE OF BLUES CD BOX SET 30 ESSENTIAL WOMEN OF THE BLUES.
 

I AM ALSO ON THE BOX SET BEST OF DOO WOP VOL. 4 AND I AM ON WIKIPEDIA SO I GUESS I AM SOMEBODY.


LargeInCharge.com: Please tell us about some of the details of your performance?

I PLAY JUMP BLUES AND SWING AND BELT OUT SONGS OF EMPOWERMENT TO AUDIENCES WORLDWIDE 250 DAYS A YEAR.


LargeInCharge.com: Do you work with others when you perform, what part do they play?

I HAVE A FOUR PIECE BAND WITH LAURA CHAVEZ ON GUITAR,=2 0PAUL LORANGER ON BASS, MY SON EVAN CALEB ON DRUMS AND SUE PALMER ON PIANO


LargeInCharge.com: What make your performances different than others?

IM A PLUS SIZED BLUES SINGER WHO CROSSES OVER TO DISENFRANCHISED AUDIENCES EVERYWHERE. I PLAY BLUES AND JAZZ FESTIVALS AS WELL AS ROCKABILLY FESTIVALS, LARGE SIZED COMMUNITY GATHERINGS, SEX WORKER GATHERINGS AND GAY PRIDE FESTIVALS.


LargeInCharge.com: Tell us what is the response you get from your audience?

THEY CLAP AND STAND IN LINE TO BUY CDS AND GET MY AUTOGRAPH. MEETING MY FANS IS MY FAVORITE PART OF THE SHOW.


LargeInCharge.com: How does your size come into play in your performance?

I HAVE WRITTEN MANY SONGS ABOUT LARGE SIZED ISSUES SUCH AS 200 POUNDS OF FUN, FIT FAT AND FINE, YOU NEED A GREAT BIG WOMAN TO SHOW YOU HOW TO LOVE, WORK WHAT YOU GOT IF ITS A LITTLE OR A LOT, BIG MAMA CANDYES BLUES, ETC


LargeInCharge.com: Do you have other people of size who work with you in your act?

I HAVE HAD BACKGROUND SINGERS AND DANCERS WHO WERE LARGE SIZED PEOPLE INCLUDING A 300 POUND DRAG QUEEN PERFORMER, TINY GIBSON AS WELL AS TOURING WITH THE FAT BOTTOM BURLESQUE TROUPE HEADED BY THE LATE GREAT HEATHER MACALLISTER.


LargeInCharge.com: Do you collaborate with other acts?

I HAVE PLAYED WITH THOUSANDS OF ARTISTS. FOR A COMPLETE LIST, CHECK MY WEBSITE AT WWW.CANDYEKANE.COM  OR WWW.MYSPACE.COM/CANDYEKANEBAND 



LargeInCharge.com: Tell us about some of the press coverage you have been featured in?

FOR A COMPLETE LIST OF TELEVISION APPEARANCES, MAGAZINE FEATURES ETC PLEASE VISIT MY WEBSITES OR INTERNET MOVIE DATA BASE WWW.IMDB.COM



LargeInCharge.com: How can people learn about you and possibly hire you, do you have a manager/agent?

YES I HAVE SEVERAL AGENTS - WWW.PIEDMONTTALENT.COM  IS MY USA
REPRESENTATION. MY RECORD LABEL IS
WWW.DELTAGROOVE.COM
MY WEBSITES ARE
WWW.CANDYEKANE.COM  OR WWW.MYSPACE.COM/CANDYEKANEBAND



LargeInCharge.com: Are you currently on tour or attending any major functions in the near future?

I AM CURRENTLY IN HOLLYWOOD RECORDING MY NEW CD, MY NINTH FOR DELTA GROOVE RECORDS. IT IS CALLED "SUPER HERO" AND WILL BE RELEASED ON JUNE 15TH WORLDWIDE. YES I AM TOURING CONSTANTLY. ATTACHED IS MY LIST OF APPEARANCES.



LargeInCharge.com: Would you say this is a form of performance art?

NO I DONT THINK SO. I AM A BLUES SINGER AND SONGWRITER



LargeInCharge.com: What type of emotions do you want your audience to experience?

I WANT THE AUDIENCE TO LEAVE FEELING HOPEFUL AND BETTER ABOUT THEMSELVES AND THEIR BODIES AND THEIR LIVES.


LargeInCharge.com: What would you say to other performers who are trying to make it?

THE MUSIC BUSINESS CAN BE REALLY BRUTAL. THE BEST THING TO DO IS FIGURE OUT WHAT MAKES YOU UNIQUE AND DIFFERENT FROM OTHERS AND THEN MAGNIFY THOSE THINGS. EVEN IF THOSE THINGS ARE PERCEIVED AS BEING NEGATIVE THINGS BY SOCIETY. I WAS A FAT TEENAGE WELFARE MOM FROM EAST LA WHO HAD BEEN A SEXWORKER. I FOUND A WAY TO MAKE ALL OF THOSE CHARACTERISTICS ATTRIBUTES INSTEAD OF DETRIMENTS.



LargeInCharge.com: Do you have a good support system from family and friends?

YES I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN VERY LUCKY TO HAVE LOTS OF GOOD BABYSITTERS WHEN MY KIDS WERE LITTLE. NOW THEY ARE GROWN BUT IT WAS ESSENTIAL TO HAVE A GOOD NETWORK OF PEOPLE WHEN THEY WERE YOUNG AND I WAS TOURING.



LargeInCharge.com: Have you had any responses from the Plus Size Community?

YES OF COURSE. I AM WELL KNOWN IN THE FAT ACCEPTANCE COMMUNITY AND HAVE MANY LARGE SIZED FANS WORLDWIDE.



LargeInCharge.com: What are your future goals?

I HAVE JUST FINISHED A STAGE PLAY ABOUT MY LIFE CALLED THE TOUGHEST GIRL ALIVE. I HOPE TO BRING THIS PLAY TO THEATERS WORLDWIDE.



LargeInCharge.com: Do you have a website, myspace page? How can the public find you or communicate with you online?

MY MUSIC IS AVAILABLE AT ITUNES, AMAZON.COM AND BORDERS AND BOOKS. YOU CAN ALSO VISIT

WWW.CANDYEKANE.COM  OR WWW.MYSPACE.COM/CANDYEKANEBAND



LargeInCharge.com: Give us one word that you can say best represents your act?

EMPOWERING



LargeInCharge.com: How much have you evolved as an performer since those first days?

EVERYONE GROWS AND EVOLVES AS THEY CONTINUE TO DO THEIR ART. PRACTICE MAKES PERFECT AND I HAVE BEEN TOURING AND PERFORMING FOR OVER FIFTEEN YEARS



LargeInCharge.com: How can the readers at www.largeincharge.com help support you?

WWW.CANDYEKANE.COM
  OR WWW.MYSPACE.COM/CANDYEKANEBAND


Candye Kane band shows

2/20 San Diego/ Tio Leos
2/21 San Diego/ Brick by Brick/ Otis Owens and Lorna Doone Hamilton
Tribute show/www.brickbybrick.com
2/22 San Diego/ Dizzys with Sue Palmer/ Janell Rock posthumous CD
release party
2/24 San Diego/ Hillcrest Mardi Gras Celebration 7 pm.
2/25 Leucadia, Ca/ The Calypso Cafe
2/27 Solana Beach/ Belly Up Tavern happy hour 5:30-8:00
Encinitas private party/ 8:00 – 10 pm
2/28 Dana Point/ The Renaissance
3/8 candye solo/Oakland ca benefit/ http://tehiyah.org/twonights.pdf
3/20 leave for Europe for Amsterdam
3/22 Stockholm, Sweden/ The Akkurat
3/23 travel day to helsinki
3/24 and 25 Helsinki, Finland/ Storyville
3/27 Umea, Sweden
3/28 Linkoping, Sweden/Great Jazz Festival
3/29 back to a’dam
3/30-31 off
4/1 travel to Vienna
4/2 Vienna, Austria/ Reigen live
4/3,4 and 5 Hornslet, Denmark/ www.Djursbluesland.dk festival
4/6 back to amsterdam
4/7 drive to basel
4/8 Basel, Switzerland/ Grand Casino
4/9 go to paris
4/10
Paris, France/ Euro Disney/ Billy Bobs
4/13 – 18 Paris, France/ Le Meridien Hotel
4/19 Purmerend, Holland/ Private party/jazzenzo.nl
4/20 and 21 UBM workshops/ Holland
4/22 home from Europe
5/1 Bakersfield, Ca/ Double Tree Hotel Club Odyssey
5/9 San Jose, Ca/ Metro Fountain Blues Festival
5/16 Casper, Wy/ The Attic
5/22 Dallas, Tx/ Pearl at Commerce
5/23 Austin, Texas/ the Continental Club
5/29 Kansas City/ Knuckleheads
5/30 Eureka Arkansas/ Blues festival
6/2 Lincoln, Nebraska/The Zoo Bar
6/3 Des Moines, Ia/ Blues on Grand
6/4 Omaha, Nebraska/Murphys
6/5 Navarre, Mn/ Narrows Saloon
6/7 Ann Arbor, Mi/ The Ark
6/6 Chicago, Ill/ Fitzgeralds
6/9 Grand Rapids, Mi/ The Intersection
6/12 Oklahoma City, OK/ Bricktown Blues Festival
6/26 Cloverdale, Ca/ Downtown Cloverdale concerts
6/27 Point Arena, Ca/ Arena Theater
6/28 San Francisco, CA/Biscuits and Blues
8/14 Woonsocket, RI/ Chans
8/15 White Mountain, New Hampshire/ Blues Festival Dani Wilde
8/18 – 9/13 United by Music Tour/ www.unitedbymusic.eu


www.candyekane.com
www.myspace.com/candyekaneband
http://www.candyekane.blogspot.com

 

 
 

Thank you for Reading The LargeInCharge Feature

Please send thoughts and comments to

articles@largeincharge.com

 

Cover Model of the Month

 

Olga Gonzalez-Ramos

 

 

Interview with our Cover Model of the Month

LargeInCharge.com: What is your name?

Olga Gonzalez-Ramos


LargeInCharge.com: Where are you from and what is your current Location?

I grew up in Weehawken but I now reside in Jersey City, NJ



LargeInCharge.com: Can you give us some information about yourself (Age, Height, Size, Nationality, Marital Status, Children, etc.)?


I am 36 yeas old, 5'8 and wear a size 24. I was born and raised in Jersey but from Colombia. I am happily married to my sexy Puerto Rican named Raul and we have a beautiful family of four kids, three boys and one sweet girl.

LargeInCharge.com: Were you a big child, or did you gain weight later in life?

I started gaining some weight in 6th grade but it was in high school where the weight became an issue.


LargeInCharge.com: (If you were a big child) how did you feel growing up as a large child?

I was a chubby teenager but not too much, and I always knew I was beautiful and it didn't bother me at all :)


LargeInCharge.com: (If you gained weight later in life) what caused you to gain weight and how did you feel about it?

In high school it started and then I had my first child at 21 and this is when it became a strong issue.


LargeInCharge.com: What made you decide to enter the LargeInCharge model search?

My size, did. I admire that the plus size industry is growing strong but let's face it they still tend to use the SAME models that wear the smaller sizes. I want to rep for the bigger girls over a size 18 and I feel I do a damn good job of it.


LargeInCharge.com: Did you find it a hard journey to be accepted for your size?

:)  NO!! I have always been accepted with open arms and looked at with respect and admiration.



LargeInCharge.com: Do you find acceptance among your family and friends?

My friends always loved me and when I met new people and friends I always heard how pretty, sweet and funny I was. I was the biggest girl in my class and from my friends but I was also the one that dated the most  :)


LargeInCharge.com: What would you say inspires you most in life?

My family, my soul, and the plus size community.



LargeInCharge.com: What is your primary job?


I am a full time journalist, plus size model and actress.


LargeInCharge.com: How did you get into this line of work?
 

My husband walked in one day with a plus size magazine in his hands and told me he really wanted me to do this because I was so beautiful.


LargeInCharge.com: Do you find acceptance in the work force?

Yes, I am a plus size model. I am one of the larger ones, besides me and the gorgeous Velvet there aren't many girls are size being celebrated and it's a darn shame. Beauty comes in all shapes and sizes.


LargeInCharge.com: What do you think about the fashion industry for big sized clothing?

Change is good and luckily for us these last couple of years we have gotten head strong designers that want to show how lovely our curves can look in hot fashions. The road is still a long one but every day we get closer to perfection with our clothes.



LargeInCharge.com: What do you wish to see change with the fashion industry?

I want the fashion world to be shared with the plus size woman, not in bits and pieces but as a whole. When fashion week comes around I want to see the big names showing their plus size line. It should be a requirement of every designer to cater to both the straight and plus size woman.


LargeInCharge.com: What changes do you think will happen if plus sized modeling for men and women were to expand?

More designers will emerge, business will be booming for every client or store that caters to the plus community. There are more of us than the thin person but there isn't enough stores for us. That needs to change.



LargeInCharge.com: Tell us one of your secret beauty tips.

I splash ice water on my face every morning and night and then add oil of Olay :) No one ever thinks I am 36 years old and when ever I work a shoot every make up artist that works with me just admires my skin and that is a huge compliment.


LargeInCharge.com: Give us some tips on how to have a successful Photo shoot. What should models be prepared for?

Don't wait to the week of, plan ahead. If you booked that shoot a month or two before. Go for those walks, even five pounds you can lose will look amazing in your pictures. Drink plenty of water and eat fish twice a week and plenty of veggies. The no grease food diet will help you out with your skin and won't let you break out. Practice in front of a mirror, your sexy faces, sad, happy. Also get your digital cam and take pics of you wearing the outfits u plan to shoot and then take a look at that image. It's better to find out now that the outfit just does not go with you than the day of the shoot. Always bring your own foundation even if you hired a make up artist. Get your mind ready and put on some music that moves you and start rocking that shoot, big girl :)

LargeInCharge.com: Look at Size acceptance five years ago... look at size acceptance now. What changes do you see?

I see more changes, bigger chairs in restaurants, airplanes and hospitals. But I still see so much negative in our society. I am sick and tired of waiting for them to come around and treat us like human beings instead of animals or things that just shouldn't be happy. Who the hell says that fat people can't be happy.


I swear 'hollywood' still is so stone age when it comes to accepting beautiful plus size talent in their 'skinny' actress only world. I am ready for fame and i am not waiting on their approval.




LargeInCharge.com: What changes do you think will happen five years from now with size acceptance?

Well with me, YOU, Jennifer Barreto-Leyva, Chenese Lewis and Velvet many amazing things I hope. We are big beautiful women that have set a mark for ourselves and we will get there, come what may!!


LargeInCharge.com: Tell us about your goals as far as modeling and other interests.

My goal is to be in another giant print magazine and to get a client like IGIGI. I want to also shoot more underground fashion and show how versatile I am with my curves. And of course shoot, shoot and shoot some more.


As an actress I want a decent size speaking role and another commercial:) As a motivational speaker I want to reach out to our young women and let them know they can be fat, chubby, gorda and still be beautiful.



LargeInCharge.com: Can you tell us about an inspirational moment in you life that made you feel good about your size.

I don't need a special award given to me or an event to make me appreciate me, and me includes my extra weight and my fat belly.



LargeInCharge.com: Is there a person in your life that makes you keep going?

My daughter, I am blessed with my adoring husband and my mom who is my best friend and my three sons, but when my daughter looks at me I can see her admiration for me, she calls me pretty mommy and is proud of all I do even though she is only four.



LargeInCharge.com: What advice would you give to other people of size who want to model?

Go for it, but be ready mentally. Get ready to grow some alligator, thick skin and let whatever garbage comes your way roll right off and keep going after your goals. Find the best way to market YOU. Not everyone can market themselves the same way. Work with your best qualities and make your look and talent be unique and brilliant.



LargeInCharge.com: What plus size figure do you admire?

Valery Amador she is the CEO of Venus Diva Magazine and also Plus Model Magazine and she has been involved with supporting and celebrating women with curves for many years. She also modeled and acted and got to show her beauty and I admire her vision for the curvy community. She is an excellent daughter and wife and has found the balance to a successful career and home life.



LargeInCharge.com: Describe yourself with one word.

Gorgeous!!!!!!

 

 

Thanks for reading about our

Cover Model of the Month

articles@largeincharge.com

Raqui's Spot

     Raqui the Owner and Founder of LargeInCharge Magazine.  This spot is dedicated to her thoughts, vents, and observations of Plus Sized Life.  Raqui's  "Tell it like it is" style of writing has brought thousands to her blogs and millions to LargeInCharge.com.  There is so much behind the woman who has brought this magazine into existence.  Being Internationally known as a wrestler/squasher lead the way to modeling for companies and being featured in magazines and documentaries from all over the world.  She has made a career out of her size and personality. Born, Raised and Residing in the Bronx NYC. This city girl is taking the world by storm.

 

     For the past 5 years Raqui officially moved into Size Acceptance and Empowerment.  With the creation of LargeInCharge she took what she said to individuals to a higher level and made it public to the internet world. She is a woman who doesn't let things get to her.  Knock her down for the moment but she will rise up stronger and better.  Being a speaker on behalf of many subjects and counseling Plus Sized people online her grace and style has made people love her.  Raqui continues to set an example of a powerful woman who will bend the world to fit her, her way.

 

     Raqui's appearances include, Uk Television, German TV, Japan, Europe, Sweden and the Spanish circuit.  Her many magazines appearances have been world wide.  She has hit American Television in 2006 with Good Morning American and since has appeared on The Cristina Show,  The Maury Show and The Tyra Banks Show.

To view her Online portfolio visit www.Raqui.com

Raqui feature on Gordos.com and Glamour Plus - go to www.Raqui.com Portfolio Section

Death by Hospital

Written By: Raqui 


 

     It was Monday April 27th 2009 when my so called stubborn big mouth saved my life.  Saturday April 25th I arrived at the Emergency Room in so much pain I wanted to die.  Death would have been relief after eleven hours or horrible pain. 

 

     Since eight am that morning I had pain in the center of my chest leading under my ribs.  I thought at first it was gas and tried all the normal things people would do to relieve it.   Alka-Seltzer's,  Gas X,  Maalox, Hot Tea, Ginger ale,  My mother and good friend both rubbed my back and ribs trying to release the gas I believed was trapped.  I had to get to the hospital while I could still walk and get into the ambulance.  911 was called and very soon I was on my way.

 

     At the Emergency Room I went through Doctor's looking at me as though I was RETARDED when I told them I have no health problems.  I repeated to at least 20 people that I DID NOT have, Diabetes, High Cholesterol,  High Blood Pressure... etc etc etc.  Blood tests confirmed all of this to their amazement,  I mean how could a big ole fat woman like me not have ONE HEALTH PROBLEM?  It was a mystery.  This prejudice almost cost me my life as you will see.

 

     After many tests that came out completely normal,  EKG,  Sonograms to my groin to detect blood clots,  Chest x rays for my lungs,  Finally they did a sonogram to the area that hurt!  They found the small tube from the gallbladder to my stomach was dilated and a stomach specialist was called in.  The Stomach Specialist told me he didn't believe that it was my gallbladder,  he said there is something going on in your stomach and we have to check,  it could be an ulcer.  Since the Hospital I was in didn't have a large enough Cat Scan Machine,  I would have to have a camera enter my body through my mouth and go down into my stomach.  And I would have to be put to sleep to do it.  I was admitted early Sunday Morning on the 26th and finally after three morphine shots the pain began to subside.

 

Bruises from Heparin shots to my upper arms

 

     I spent Sunday on a liquid diet waiting for my procedure on Monday.  My chest was very sore and I felt so tired,  Again more blood was taken and I was being given IV antibiotics and heparin shots (a blood thinner) I am not sure why but I was told it is mandatory.  They stabbed my arms so viciously trying to get through my fat (I ASSUME) that I was left with knots and bruises on my upper arms.

 

     Monday morning I had to face anesthesia and I was nervous about it.  But I cant complain about the camera procedure that went completely well it is what happen afterward that almost cost me my life.  Many doctors consulted with me and I was told that my stomach itself was inflamed and making to much acid.  That was the root of the problem and my pain.  I was then put on medication to control stomach acid.

 

     Here is where the big mouth I have saved me.  Monday afternoon they are preparing me to leave the hospital as long as I can keep a meal down.  Final blood had to be drawn to double check everything and while I wasn't happy about it I let them take it.  They came back to me saying that my Sugar level was sky high...

 

What do you mean... How high?   I asked

 

Why didn't you say your Diabetic?  the woman who took my blood asked.

 

I'm not Diabetic...   I don't have high sugar.  I said matter of factly.

 

Well with your weight you know....  

 

I cut her off immediately and said.   Listen I know I am not Diabetic...  I have a doctor I go to and have never been pronounced with Diabetes.  I just went to her last month, and my tests are clear!  For the past two days I have been getting blood tests and they are all normal so don't tell me that now I have suddenly become Diabetic!

 

It could be because of the procedure,  your weight,  You cannot leave until your Sugar is normal so we have to medicate you and bring it down.

 

NO... Take it again!  Take my blood again!  I said.

 

     I refused the medication and put my foot down to have my blood taken again.  The woman who took my blood then re-entered and asked me.  

 

Where did I take your blood from?   Your right it doesn't make sense that your sugar is suddenly high.

 

     I then showed my arm to her and the vein she removed the blood from.

 

OH I HAVE TO TAKE YOUR BLOOD AGAIN!!! she exclaimed.   You have a I.V. in that arm and that could make the test inaccurate.  I will be right back to take your blood again!

 

Bruises from having my blood taken improperly three collapsed veins

 

   After she poked me to no avail three times, making me bleed all over my gown, and left me horrible bruises she got another person to come take my blood and once it was tested I got a clean bill of health with out HIGH SUGAR!!!  With out that medication they were so ready to pump into my body.

 

     It wasn't until I got home and the next day that I told my brother about it did he say.  They could have killed you!.  If they would have put that medication into you, you would have gone into a Diabetic Coma and quite possibly have died.   If anyone would have found out that she took blood out of that vein she would have lost her job.   And of course since I am a big fat woman it would have been easy for them to cover it up.

 

     Right now I could be in a freezer somewhere pronounced with Diabetes instead of the true reason!  DEATH BY HOSPITAL!!!    The automatic assumption that I was a diabetic no matter of my records and medical history is terrible.  The fact that many in the medical field believe that every person of size must have a health problem is horrific.  It seems as though they were waiting for one test to come out badly so they have a reason to preach gastric bypass and pump medicine into my body to try and set me right!  Show me how wrong I am about not having health problems.  But my big mouth and persistent claims made them think it through when they should have thought it through from the beginning.  Maybe they should have people who obviously know how to take blood properly.  After taking my blood from the wrong arm and then making three veins on the other arm collapse I would say she needs to get recertified.  At least she listened to my claims of course they were done with a loud determined voice that demands attention.

 

     Could this have happened to anyone?  Yes it could have...  But I believe that those taking care of me leaned more toward something wrong with me.  Than something wrong with them, because in their eyes I am a Big Fat Woman one step away from a medical nightmare!  All people (especially Plus Sized)  have to be our own advocates.  KNOWLEDGE IS POWER,  Have a regular doctor and know your what your blood tests mean.  Have a medical history on record and have physicals.  Ask questions, demand retesting if necessary, I AM SCARED TO DEATH OF NEEDLES but that didn't stop me from getting them to take my blood again.  Doctor's, Nurses and other Patient Care Service Workers have a sense of authority because they are supposed to be dedicated to your health and well being.  But many of them are not qualified because they have prejudices that make them point toward you first instead of assessing the situation properly.  We also listen to them because of that Authority.  If I would have listened to them before myself, and let them medicate me.  I probably would not be writing this article today.

 

 Your Health is your responsibility,  with out knowledge you cant make a proper decision and fight for your rights.  It is your Life... Cherish it.

 

With Love Raqui

 

LargeInCharge Radio - Weekly Radio show discussing Plus Sized Issues.  Friday's 7-9 pm EST - Call in & Chat in our Chat Room.

Raqui's Cool Links

www.raqui.com  

Raqui's My Space Page

Raqui's Yahoo 360 Page

Thank you for Reading Raqui's Spot

Please send thoughts and comments to

articles@largeincharge.com

Super Sized Sounds

with

Lynx

     Super Sized Sounds will be a Music Column that will feature those who are in the industry or up and coming who are size positive. Giving recognition to the plus sized people who are out there and showcasing themselves.  Reviews, Interview, News and more from our new writer Super Sized Spanishfly Lynx.

 

      Lynx Garcia, also known as "SUPERSIZE SPANISHFLY", is a Latina BBW from Queens NYC.  Lynx is an activist speaking out against size discrimination and began performing back in 1996 at social events for big beautiful women and big handsome males and their admirers. Her special mixture of sound held true as she sang, spat, danced and performed spoken word, soon she was in demand by Big and Beautiful parties nationwide.  Lynx taking her "look" and sound mainstream was rejected because of her size. She did not let this break her spirit, hurt her confidence or minimize her drive. Instead she rose up and started a public access show (LYNX' LAIR) aired in Queens on TIME WARNER QPTV . Combination of comedy and sexy style, she showcased underground artists of all walks of life. The response to her show was PHENOMENAL....in less than a year she has showcased many artist, some who moved to bigger and better things.

 

     Currently Lynx has caught the attention of Joey Mekkah of BLACK SOLARIS ENTERTAINMENT and found herself on the Grandmaster MELLE MEL's SOLO ALBUM "MUSCLES" featured on the hot latin hip-hop track called 'DIMELO", she is the only collaboration on the album. Lynx recently has started her own radio show on EXTRAVAGANGSTARADIO.COM  called Ladies Night. EXTRAVAGANGSTARADIO is #1 on the itunes network.

 

     WANT TO SUBMIT YOUR VOICE FOR REVIEW? See Below

 

 

My people, mi gente…   I have a real special treat for our loyal readers, this month SUPERSIZE SOUNDS salutes R&B /Rap Group Trillogy’s BBW member Rita Tyler , show some love for our sister and make sure you take advantage of the free download of Trilogy’s new hit single “WARNING”. I had the opportunity to meet Rita and she is one of the most humble real sisters I have come across in this music industry.

RITA TYLER

Photobucket

Do you remember back in the mid to late 1990’s when great R&B singers were overwhelming the industry with soft words and meaningful lyrics? As the years have gone by, the female population has thinned to almost bare and R&B has fallen into another genre of music. What will it take to make R&B its own again? The answer is Rita Tyler.

This 21-year-old female carries the distinct voice of reason. Raised in Neptune, N.J., at a very early age Rita’s family knew she was very gifted and talented. Her love for music developed when she was old enough to understand the words to her favorite songs. At the age of two, Rita became the household entertainment by singing and performing for her family. As a result of her entertaining, they realized she could sing and carry beautiful notes sky high. Venturing out into unfamiliar territory might have an adverse effect on any average young person. However, Rita knew what she liked to hear and soon developed her own sense and style for writing music.

While most of her creativity came from life experiences, she could not forget where she acquired her gift. This gift, her love of music, she received from her mother. Her mother was her biggest support and inspiration. Suddenly she found herself without this support because unexpectedly, her mother passed away. Typically, with the passing of a parent, most adolescent children may rebel, but Rita being a unique and special individual expressed her anger and pain on paper. These feelings resulted in the creation of some of the most touching lyrics any artist has yet to explore. She believes that with each great memory that we may lose, there is another great song to be made in honor of it. Her music is real, it is honest and it is R&B. The R&B many of us have watched pass. Let us open our ears and bring these feelings of true R&B back into our lives.

Bio courtesy of S.M.G

 

Here is a your free download of “Warning” by S.M.G’s Trilogy

 warning

Starr Media Group LLC.

 

www.starrmediagroup.com
http://lovelifeandloyalty.com
www.myspace.com/starrmediagroup
www.myspace.com/trillogysmg
www.soundclick.com/starrmediagroup

   
Want to send in your Voice in for review? Are you a singer, rapper, or poet who performs spoken word?  Up and Coming, already established?  Contact Lynx through her Myspace page or email articles@largeincharge.com and all information will be forwarded to her (PUT "FOR LYNX" IN THE SUBJECT AREA) 

You must be a Size Positive Artist, or a Plus Sized Supporter.

Thanks for reading

Super Sized Sounds with Lynx

articles@largeincharge.com

 

Lynx Cool Links

www.myspace.com/supersizespanishfly

www.myspace.com/somemorelynx

www.Extravagangstaradio.com

From the Plus Side

with

Emily Smiltneck

     From the Plus side will be column dedicated to short stories that deal with all aspects of Plus size Life.  Emily Smiltneck was chosen for this position because of her dedication, and realistic writing style. She captures the emotional and mental rollercoaster those who are Plus Sized go through.

 

     Emily Susanne Smiltneck lives in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan (pretty much dead center in the middle of nowhere). She is a substitute teacher, and has recently started a tutoring business. Emily is currently working on several writing projects, including a historical fiction novel and several collections of poetry.

Emily Smiltneck receives recognition in Neighbors Daily Press - See article below

    

     It is a great joy when our fellow Plus Sized people receive recognition for their life's work.  Join me in this Joyous moment when one of our LargeInCharge writers is seen for her contribution and great dedication to her goals in life.  Click the images above to read the article about our dear Emily. When the page open click on the article to zoom in and read it.

 

The Adventures of Phatgurl

by Emily Suzanne Smiltneck  

The Adventures Of Phatgurl is a serial collection of stories about the adventures of Jany, a plus-sized young woman who, in desperation, places an ad on a personals website.  As she embarks on her dates, she meets many different kinds of men who expect many different things from her.  Some of her adventures are wildly amusing and others are more serious and even sad. 

If you have any ideas or experiences, funny or otherwise, that you would like to see depicted in a future Phatgurl story, please e-mail me at emilysuzanne20@hotmail.com.  I will do my very best to incorporate all reader ideas into future columns.  Thanks!

 

The Ad

SW SSBBW seeks SM willing to ask her out.  Need not buy gifts, remember dates, put toilet seat down.  Video game fanatics and men who require guys’ nights out okay.  Willing to watch action movies and avoid “the talk.”  Reply to: phatgurl@personalz.com

 

Candidate 8: The Groper

 To: phatgurl@personalz.com

From: 69er2009@personalz.com

Subject: Hey, Gurl!

 

I seen ur ad.  Sound like u’d be a good girl to snuggle with.  I need summa that.  Been a long time.

 

To: 69er2009@personalz.com

From: phatgurl@personalz.com

Subject: Re: Hey, Gurl!

 

lol… ok.  I made myself a promise a long time ago that I wouldn’t respond to anyone who had “69” in his username, unless it was very obviously not a reference to the obvious, but I decided to give you a shot anyway.  Against my better judgment.  So tell me more about yourself before I change my mind.

 

I, myself, work in an art gallery.  I’m into all those creative, artsy kinds of things.  I don’t go out to much, like to bars and clubs and stuff, but I like to when I get the chance.  And you?

 

ttyl- Jany

 

To: phatgurl@personalz.com

From: 69er2009@personalz.com

Subject: Re: Re: Hey, Gurl!

 

Cool beans.  I work at a gas station on 91st.  U should cum see me at work sometime.  We’ll have some fun in my car on my break.  Do u dare?

 

To: 69er2009@personalz.com

From: phatgurl@personalz.com

Subject: Hahahahaha.  Ha!

 

Let’s just say I’ve been there, done that, and I found out that I’m not really into the whole random, meaningless hookup thing.  At the very least, I’m looking for FWB.  Emphasis on the F.

 

To: phatgurl@personalz.com

From: 69er2009@personalz.com

Subject: Re: Hahahahaha.  Ha!

 

I don’t know what that means, other than that u turned me down.  What’s FWB?  Cum on.  Try me.  I sent a pic.  Can I have 1 of u?

 

To: 69er2009@personalz.com

From: phatgurl@personalz.com

Subject: Re: Re: Hahahahaha.  Ha!

 

Wow- we went to school together, I think!  You were like a year behind me or something.  You’re Steve, right?  We never really talked or anything—no one really talked to me—but I remember you. 

 

BTW, FWB=friends with benefits.  I was just letting you know I’m looking for some kind of a relationship, even if it’s just friendship.  Girls who look like me don’t get naked with people who aren’t at least friends.  Can you handle that?  Oh, and I shot a pic back atcha.  Remember me?

 

To: phatgurl@personalz.com

From: 69er2009@personalz.com

Subject: Holy shit!

 

Yeah, I remember u.  Wow.  I always had a crush on u when I was a kid.  I was just scared to talk to u.  U should cum see me at work.  Really.  I work Wed-Sun nights from midnite-6.

 

To: 69er2009@personalz.com

From: phatgurl@personalz.com

Subject: Re: Holy shit!

 

Really?  You had a crush on me?

 

And are you nuts, by the way?  I work in the mornings!  I guess I could come on a Friday or Saturday, but I’m really not sure it’s safe to be toodling around on buses all night.  Oh, well.  Gotta take some risks in life, right?  Maybe I’ll see ya Saturday night.  But this is a just friends thing for now, ‘kay?

 

To: phatgurl@personalz.com

From: 69er2009@personalz.com

Subject: Re: Re: Holy shit!

 

Cool.  See u then.  U should wear a skirt.  With no underwear.

 

            The message made Jany angry, but her anger was tempered by a flush of giddy excitement.  She remembered Steve as shy, quiet, not one of the cool kids.  She was pretty sure he’d been a stutterer, and the other kids had made fun of him for it.  And he wasn’t an overly attractive guy, to be honest.

            But Jany couldn’t help wondering how her life might have been different if she’d known he’d had a crush on her.  She’d never had a boyfriend, never known any boys who would even talk to her.  Not back in school.  She’d grown up assuming that no one had even been attracted to her, and that no one ever would be.  She didn’t believe that anymore, of course.  At least, she hadn’t thought she did, but Steve’s admission had shaken her to her very core.  As much as she wanted to be angry and indignant at his offer—have some fun in his car?  Not the kind of “date” Jany was looking for!—she was actually flattered.

            She changed her mind a thousand times on Saturday.  She awoke in the morning to find herself alone in bed, lonely, and thought she might as well go see him.  Then she settled herself at the kitchen table and painted a picture of her view into the apartment next door—an extraordinarily beautiful and detailed picture that made her feel strong and confident.  She decided not to go because, in that moment, she felt like she would have no trouble at all finding another man, one who would like her and not just lust for her.  Then Jany decided it couldn’t hurt to go, just to talk to an old friend.  Never mind that they’d never been friends.  And then she thought that it might be better not to go.  Back and forth, back and forth, all day long.

            Finally, at 10:30 Saturday night, she crawled out of bed.  She’d tried to sleep early, just in case, but it wouldn’t happen.  Her heart was racing and every little sound made her head snap up instantly.  And she figured that if she wasn’t sleeping, there wasn’t anything keeping her from going to see Steve.

            Jany got in the shower and stood under scalding hot water until she couldn’t stand it anymore, just to shock herself into reality in case it made a difference.  Then she got out and rubbed lotion into her pink skin before she pulled on a skirt and sweater.  And the ugliest, most old lady-like underwear she had, just to be contrary.  Not that she intended to let Steve see them.

            She got on the bus around midnight.  The only other person on it was an elderly man who looked like he might be on the bus just because it was warmer than the park bench he lived on.  He didn’t seem to be dangerous, though, and the bus driver seemed like a nice enough guy.  He’d probably save her if she needed him to.  She settled into the seat and waited for the stop Steve had told her to watch for.

            She could see the gas station when she stepped off the bus into a dark and scary neighborhood.  She wanted to dilly-dally along the way and put off walking into the gas station as long as possible, but she was afraid if she didn’t walk quickly and with purpose, she’d be murdered or raped before she got there.  She felt safer when she approached the building, which was well-lit inside and out.  She paused to peer through a window that was mostly blocked by liquor bottles and grime.  What little she could see was the area behind the counter.  There he was.  In person.  Sitting behind the counter in the empty store, playing solitaire with a deck of cards featuring a different bikini-clad girl on the back of each one.

            Jany braced herself, then approached the door.  A big stupid grin plastered itself on her face and she pushed the door open and slowly walked in.  Steve lifted his head as a bell rang, warning him of her arrival.

            “Hey, there, Sexy.”

            “Um—hi.”  Jany giggled, then grimaced.  “I—how ya doing?  Good seeing you again.”

            “Yeah.  Wasn’t really expecting to see ya.”

            “I almost didn’t come.  But here I am.”

            “Here you are.”

            “Here I am.”

            “Here—”

            “Okay, really,” Jany interrupted.  “We’ve established that I’m here and now we’re just saying nothing.  Let’s take a new tack.  What’s up?”

            Steve laughed and slid the deck of cards back into their box.  Jany noticed that he was careful not to let her see the bikini pictures.

            “Not much.  Just workin’.  ‘Bout all I ever do.  What’s up with you?”

            “Same.  Been doing this whole personals thing for a few months now, but otherwise, just been work.”

            “How’s it going for ya?  The personals thing.”

            “Okay, I guess.  Haven’t met the love of my life or anything, but it’s been a learning experience.”

            “I bet.  I’d like to teach ya some things.”

            Jany giggled again.  An awkward pause followed before Steve spoke again.

            “Sound good to you?”

            “Um—maybe?   I mean, it depends what you mean.  God, this feels like a weird conversation.  To me, anyway.  Does it to you, too?”

            “Nope.  I’m on break in a half hour.  John’ll be up to watch the counter.  You can come out to my car while I eat.”

            Smooth transition.  She had to give him credit for so expertly avoiding the issue of just what he wanted to teach her.

            “You eat in your car?  That’s kind of weird.”

            “Tonight I do.”  He grinned.  “So whatcha been up to since school?”

            “Not much, really.  I went to school to study art history for a while and now I work in a gallery.  I take a class every now and then.  Might get a degree eventually.  That’s about it.”

            “Cool.  I had enough of school by the time graduation came around.  I work here and with my dad, fixin’ cars.  You got any kids?”

            “What, me?  No.  Oh, God, no.  I mean, not that I don’t want any.  I’ve never even really dated anyone, though.  All you have to do is look at me to know I don’t have any kids.  I mean—”  Jany stopped talking.  Nothing like making yourself look like a complete idiot and loser.  “I—I didn’t really mean that.  I was—kidding.”  She faked a giggle that, at best, was the laughter equivalent of a dog running away with its tail tucked between its legs.

            “Aw, com’ on.  It ain’t that bad.  I’d make babies with ya.”

            “Mm hmm.  Sure.  But anyway, no, I don’t have any kids.  Do you?”

            “Yeah, I got a couple.  Don’t get to see ‘em, though.  Just when I see ‘em around or whatever.”

            “Ah.  I see.  Their mother—you’re not—with her, then?”

            “Nah.  I don’t see either one of ‘em anymore.  We were never really together, just kinda hung out and shit.”

            “Oh.”

            “Yeah.”

            They made small talk for another fifteen minutes or so, pausing once when someone came in to buy cigarettes.  Then another guy wandered in from the back.

            “Hey, Steve-o.  You can take off now if ya want.  I’m here.”

            “Awright, John.  She’s all yours.  Slow night.”  Steve stood up and slipped out from behind the counter.

            “Com’ on, Jany.  Let’s go.  I’ll show ya everything you been missing out on.”

            Jany stared at the floor.  John had to have heard what Steve had said, and there weren’t too many ways to interpret his words.  She hurried out the door after Steve.  The darkness and cool air were a relief.

            He unlocked his car ducked inside.  Jany opened the passenger side door and started sliding in.

            “Hold on, there, Babe.  I was just grabbin’ somethin’.  Let’s get in the back.  More comfortable.”

            Jany stood up.  She considered just walking away.  It couldn’t hurt to just sit there, though, could it?  He had to eat lunch, after all.  She could always get out if things got weird.  Hesitantly, she closed the front door and opened the back one.  Steve got in on the other side.

            “So—ya came to see me.”

            “Yep.”

            Steve just looked at Jany for a second, then suddenly wrapped his arms around the back of her neck, pulled her close, and kissed her almost violently.  A swell of excitement rushed through Jany’s body, but she forced herself to pull away.

            “Uh, hey.  I thought—I thought you had to eat.”

            “I do.  I wasn’t talking about food, though.”  His grin was half seductive and half just plain frightening.

            “Oh?” Jany said.  Then, “Oh!”  It took a second for her to grasp what he was saying, but when she did, she sat upright.  It was too late, though.  Steve’s hand was already dancing its way down her back and sliding under the waistband of her skirt.  She tried to clear her mind and make him stop, but her brain had suddenly turned to mush.  Finally, she pushed him back and slid to the other side of the backseat.

            “Hold on.  Can you hold on?  I’m—just give me a minute to think, okay?  Please?”

            “Take your time, Baby.”  He winked at her.

            Jany smoothed her skirt and looked out the window.  The first clear thought that came to her was that he had probably already discovered one of the holes in her ratty underwear, which was just a little humiliating.  The second thought was that, as much as she wanted to care, she didn’t.  She didn’t care about her underwear and she didn’t care that he was practically forcing himself on her.  Because, she had to admit, she kind of wanted him to. 

            The reason that she was resisting was that she felt like she was supposed to.  A good girl wouldn’t mess around with a near stranger in the backseat of a car.  A good girl wouldn’t let a guy use her for meaningless sex.  But what if she really wasn’t a good girl?  What if she’d always just been a good girl because there hadn’t been any other choice?  What if he wasn’t using her—what if she was using him?  Slowly, she scooted back toward Steve.

            “Okay.  I’m good now.”  She leaned over, took his face in her hands, and this time it was she who kissed him.  Jany totally lost herself in his manly scent and the way his hands felt on her skin as they slipped under her skirt and found their way to places that hadn’t been touched in months.  And then suddenly, something was thumping loudly on the outside of the car.

            “Shit!” Steve muttered as he untangled his hands from her skirt, wiped them quickly on his pants, and jumped out of the car.  Jany’s heart thudded as she lay across the seat and peered out the window.  Were they being robbed, car-jacked?  Her hand immediately went to her pocket and she pulled out her cell phone. 

            “What’s going on here?” a female voice shrieked.  “I hate you, mother f—”

            “Settle down, Sandy.  It’s not what you think.”

            “Then what the hell is it!?!”

            Jany got out of the car.  The woman standing face-to-face with Steve was rather large, just a little mean-looking, and definitely angry.

            “Yeah,” Jany said softly.  “What’s going on?”

            Steve looked about as uncomfortable as a person could look.

            “Um—hey, Jany?  This is—well, this is Sandy.”

            “Yeah, I’m Sandy, Bitch.  What you doin’ with my man?”

            “Your—he’s—I—I’m sorry.  I’m sorry.”  Jany started backing away. 

             The woman came around the car toward her.

            “I said, what you doing with my man?”

            “Nothing,  Absolutely nothing.  I didn’t know, I swear.  He said he was single.  Look, I don’t want anything to do with him.  You can have him.  I don’t care.  I’ll never talk to him again.”  Jany was walking backwards and crying as she sputtered out words.  She wasn’t really even thinking about what she was saying, was too frightened and shocked to think at all.  She just didn’t want the other woman to have a chance to talk, so she didn’t allow her to have one.  Steve was following them, calling out every once in a while for Sandy to relax.  Jany’s heart was beating so fast and hard she could feel it in her toes.  She didn’t have enough breath to keep going much longer.  Luckily, the other woman was a little short of breath, too, and she was slowing down. 

            “I’m sorry,” Jany said.  “Really, really sorry.  I would have left him alone if I’d known!”  She turned around and ran toward the bus stop.  Luckily, the bus pulled up just as she reached the corner.  She could hear the other woman yelling at Steve in the distance, and the faint murmur of Steve’s apologetic voice.  She glanced toward them one more time as she stepped onto the bus.  She had finally decided to just relax and have fun, not to worry about being a good girl, and look what had happened.  Another disaster.

            Except, for some reason, she didn’t feel too horrible about this disaster.  In fact, she found herself giggling as she settled into a seat near the back of the bus, because she suddenly realized that her ratty underwear were still on the floor of Steve’s car.

   
   
 

Thanks for reading

From the Plus Side with Emily Smiltneck

articles@largeincharge.com

 

Emily's Cool Links

www.myspace.com/heartsoulspirit

Good 4 U Food

Recipes for Good... Healthy Food

By: Xander - The Food Dude

   

Legislatutus Interruptus

by Xander The Food Dude

Sometimes I actually open my eyes and see where the world is going, and it scares me.  With everything that has come to pass in the last few months, few can doubt that we are in store for some “interesting” times ahead.  But, I think realistically there are changes on the way that may hit closer to home.

I had been thinking about this article for sometime.  I had started work on it, but either it would go on to long or seem far to short to make the point I really wanted to make.  That is, until I saw and article out of the Sun from Great Britian until I saw and article entitled “Fat People Cause Global Warming.”  At first I thought it was another silly story from The Sun who is renowned throughout the world as having some of the strangest stories.

The article goes on to detail the “scientific fact” that as large people we inhale more oxygen and exhale more CO2 emissions then our “in shape (whatever that means) counterparts.  Due to the increase in the CO2 emissions from our collectively large existence is causing the questionable (ok, my opinion) theory of global warming.

Ok, so here’s where I go conspiracy theorist sounding for some.  Recently, at work there was an announcement that starting in January 2010 if you smoke or someone in your household in which you are exposed to second hand smoke, you would be subject to an additional $50.00 charge for your health care coverage.  Two years ago, I would have said “You don’t like it, quit smoking.”  But now, be it due to increased awareness or (dare I say it) wisdom, I see where this is really going.  We have a woman in our office who is probably to biggest chain smoker I’ve ever seen.  Essentially, even if you’re not looking you know when she passes by from the odor of the cigarette smoke.  She walks into the office steaming mad, asking who is going to protest this, I roll out of my cubicle and say I will.  She looks at me strangely and says  “Xander, you don’t smoke.”

She doesn’t realize what I realize.  After the smokers, the fat people are next.  The fat people will the targets to be negated or neutralized.  Due to our increasing health care cost and the drag we place on the whole of society, we will be targeted for the increased cost of the “normals” in society having to accommodate our large forms.  Recently, an airline decided to charge fat people double the rate if the took up anymore space than one coach seat.  Anybody been in a coach class seat lately ?  I can see it at the terminals now, one coach class seat there to have us sit in to see if we exceed the width of those little chairs.  I say fine, you don’t need my dollars you &%#$# airline.  I’ll take my business elsewhere.  But eventually, the world will role in the same direction.  You will comply to what society deems as an appropriate form.  You WILL submit to the necessary procedures to be what society deems you should be, or you will be allowed to die.

Parts of the stimulus package prompt health to be restricted on elderly unless it could extend their lives by a certain amount, if not, they will be allowed to die without care, merely given medication to comfort the end.  Yes, my friends I am scared.  I see the changes that are being put into place now, and they scare me, not necessarily for myself because I should be long gone before this plays out, but rather for my children and my children’s children.  When society as a whole allows the government to set standard of existence, our future becomes one where decision of who lives and dies are as important as what type of toilet paper we use  (recycled of course).  Our president says that we are no longer fighting a war on terrorism.  He’s right we aren’t.  We now wage a war on individualism, and I fear “they” will win.  Any time a government is allowed to determine the fate of a particular race, creed, color, sex, or any number of qualities, we take a gigantic step toward a fascist society.  We see ourselves as individuals, but the government sees us in groups like smokers and/or fat people.  But hey, look at the good side, when all the “bad” elements like smokers, fat people, addicts of any kind, elderly, physically and mentally challenged people, are eliminated, we will finally have the best of the best to ensure the existence of the human species.  We will finally have what one political figure called the “Master Race.”  While history records that Hitler was an obsessive, driven madman, there are countless sources that indicate that in his mind he was only trying to remove the “bad” elements from society so that it could flourish.  So I would think that in returning to the fated article that indicates the fat people cause global warming I would think they would suggest that fat people should breathe less or not at all.

Me, I think I’ll just let him know he can shove that paper right up his article and recycle it.

This month I’ve include several recipes for you to celebrate Cinco de Mayo, The holiday commemorates the Mexican army's unlikely defeat of French forces at the Battle of Puebla on May 5, 1862, under the leadership of Mexican General Ignacio Zaragoza Seguín.

The Battle was significant for at least two reasons. First, while out numbered almost two-to-one, the Mexicans defeated a much better-equipped French army that had known no defeat for almost 50 years. Second, this battle was important because it would be "the last time that an army from another continent invaded the Americas." While significant, however, Cinco de Mayo is not an obligatory federal holiday in Mexico.

While Cinco de Mayo has limited or no significance nationwide in Mexico, the date is observed in the United States and other locations around the world as a celebration of Mexican heritage and pride.

Xander's Recipe of the Month

 

Corn and Avocado Salad

INGREDIENTS

  • 8 slices bacon
  • 2 heads butterhead lettuce
  • 1 red bell pepper, chopped
  • 1 bunch green onions, chopped
  • 4 ears sweet corn, cut off the cob
  • 2 avocados - peeled, seeded and cubed
  • 2/3 cup red wine and vinegar salad dressing
  • 3 tablespoons blue cheese salad dressing
  • 2 tablespoons honey

DIRECTIONS

  1. Saute bacon in a large, deep skillet over medium high heat until evenly brown. Drain, crumble and set aside.
  2. In a large bowl, combine the lettuce, red bell pepper, green onions and corn, and mix together. Carefully stir in the cubed avocado.
  3. In a separate small bowl, whisk together the red wine and vinegar dressing, the blue cheese dressing, and the honey.
  4. Pour the dressing mixture over the salad and toss. Add bacon just before serving to keep it crunchy.

 

Churros

INGREDIENTS

  • 1 cup water
  • 2 1/2 tablespoons white sugar
  • 1/2 teaspoon salt
  • 2 tablespoons vegetable oil
  • 1 cup all-purpose flour
  • 2 quarts oil for frying
  • 1/2 cup white sugar, or to taste
  • 1 teaspoon ground cinnamon

 

DIRECTIONS

  1. In a small saucepan over medium heat, combine water, 2 1/2 tablespoons sugar, salt and 2 tablespoons vegetable oil. Bring to a boil and remove from heat. Stir in flour until mixture forms a ball.
  2. Heat oil for frying in deep-fryer or deep skillet to 375 degrees F (190 degrees C). Pipe strips of dough into hot oil using a pastry bag. Fry until golden; drain on paper towels.
  3. Combine 1/2 cup sugar and cinnamon. Roll drained churros in cinnamon and sugar mixture.

 

Chicken and Corn Chili

 

INGREDIENTS

  • 4 skinless, boneless chicken breast halves
  • 1 (16 ounce) jar salsa
  • 2 teaspoons garlic powder
  • 1 teaspoon ground cumin
  • 1 teaspoon chili powder
  • salt to taste
  • ground black pepper to taste
  • 1 (11 ounce) can Mexican-style corn
  • 1 (15 ounce) can pinto beans

DIRECTIONS

  1. Place chicken and salsa in the slow cooker the night before you want to eat this chili. Season with garlic powder, cumin, chili powder, salt, and pepper. Cook 6 to 8 hours on Low setting.
  2. About 3 to 4 hours before you want to eat, shred the chicken with 2 forks. Return the meat to the pot, and continue cooking.
  3. Stir the corn and the pinto beans into the slow cooker. Simmer until ready to se

 

Fresh Tomato Salsa

 

INGREDIENTS

  • 3 tomatoes, chopped
  • 1/2 cup finely diced onion
  • 5 serrano chiles, finely chopped
  • 1/2 cup chopped fresh cilantro
  • 1 teaspoon salt
  • 2 teaspoons lime juice

DIRECTIONS

  1. In a medium bowl, stir together tomatoes, onion, chili peppers, cilantro, salt, and lime juice. Chill for one hour in the refrigerator before serving.

 

Pepper-Mint Limeade

INGREDIENTS

  • 4 limes, juiced
  • 1 cup white sugar
  • 2 sprigs fresh mint
  • 1/2 gallon water
  • 1 fresh jalapeno pepper, sliced

DIRECTIONS

  1. In a large pitcher, stir together the lime juice and sugar until dissolved. Stir in mint sprigs, and mash with a wooden spoon to release some of the oils. Pour in water, and mix well. Mix in jalapeno slices. Put a lid on the pitcher, and refrigerate 8 hours, or overnight.
   
 

Thank you for Reading Good Food 4U

By Xander the Food Dude

Please send thoughts and comments to

articles@largeincharge.com

Big Girls on the Red Carpet

   

Cher was born in Los Angeles California in 1955. Being adopted by wonderful parents she grew up in the city of Encino, and was always surrounded by loving caring family and friends. Growing up with a thin mother, who was always trying to get Cher to lose weight, diets of all types, sending her to fat camp, bribing her, and
not ever having sweets in their home.

Growing up Cher never was lacking in friends and boyfriends who loved her personality and her kindness.
Guys in her life always were saying your so pretty but why don't you lose some weight. This she heard all of her life but her weight just would go up and down.

Cher has always loved seeing others happy and helping others to find their inner self and beauty.
Ten years ago, she found the plus size community and she knew this is where she would focus on helping others who were like her and had some of her experiences and pain that she went through.

Cher has been in the community working with others for size acceptance. She was seen on "Dr.Phil, "Good Morning America","Entertainment Tonight", "Russian, British, Japanese,and Viet Vietnamese Television". Also a documentary filmed at the Las Vegas Bash on the Travel channel, and Current TV, a online station, with numerous radio interviews talking about size acceptance.


She was a promoter for the number one BBW hip hop club in California, and seeing people come into the club and make new friends and feel good about themselves warmed her heart.

Her love for helping others to feel better about themselves and to help mainstream accept the plus size community is her focus and goal. She is Vice President of "Hollywood Cure For Pain" a celebrity movement to help those who suffer in chronic pain. She is now showing mainstream that "Big Girls can rock the Red Carpet"! Besides being a wife, mother and activist, playing with her Chocolate Lab Ruby is what she loves best!

   

Truth Movement Event on April 10, 2009

Article by: Cher Rue 

 

 

 This was a Live Premier for their new album Technology Analogy and they performed the album in its entirety. The evening was hosted by Ed Begley Jr. and  had many special surprise elements. Corey Feldman and Truth Movement auctioned off on stage a Squier® by Fender® Stratocaster® autographed by the entire band. It was a Green Carpet Charity Event helping to Raise Funds and Collective Consciousness for our Environment. The show was held at the Key Club on Sunset Strip at PM.This event was to raise money for Global Green USA for our environment.  

Ed Begley Jr. hosted the event. Ed is one of the leading voices in environmental issues, and created his own line of echo friendly products. He wanted  to spread some positive words of hope. He currently has a reality show about green living called Living With Ed on Planet Green with his wife, actress Rachelle Carson. The evening is a Green Carpet Charity Event helping to Raise Funds and Collective Consciousness for our Environment. As you know a all of the evenings profits will go to Global Green a non profit organization. 

Amongst the line up is Jon Carin (multi-instrumentalist) 25-year veteran of Pink Floyd co-writing their massive hit "learning to fly", Mark Karan (Rat Dog) 10-year lead guitarist and extended "Grateful Dead family" (The Other Ones, Mickey Hart's Planet Drum, Phil Lesh & Friends and Bob Weir & Rat Dog).

There were five sponsors  who will be contributed to the event: BMI Entertainment, FUEL (The Film), Fender, who is donating a Squier® by Fender® Stratocaster® guitar autographed by the entire band to be auctioned at the event, NJOY, a nicotine based smokeless cigarette smoking alternative, which does not pollute our environment; and Eco Limo, an environmentally friendly limo company who will be supplying our cars for the evening.
The list of performers and key people that joined on stage.

  • Scotty Page (saxophonist for Pink Floyd) 
  • Andrew and Liz (The Wizards)
    Executive Producers of Technology Analogy
  • Greg Cipes (Cipes and the People)
  • Steve Shapiro (Laserium light show in Los Angeles)
  • BMI and Fender (Sponsors)
  • Kevin Vickery (Co-producer of Fuel: a film about alternative energy)
  • Walter Rodzen
    (Direct your own video contest winner for “Green is the Colour”)

Celebrities Attending the Event:

  • Greg Cipes (Fast and Furious 4)
  • Hugh M. Hefner (Playboy)
  • Meredith Salenger (Race to Witch Mountain)
  • Kristoff St. John (The Young and the Restless)
  • Susie Feldman (Playboy Playmate and The Two Corey's)
  • Jeff Conaway (Grease)
  • Steven Adler (Guns N' Roses)
  • Sean Astin (The Lord of the Rings and The Goonies)
  • Matthew Nelson (Nelson Twins)
  • Priscilla Taylor (Playboy Playmate)
  • Tanya Memme (Sell This House)
  • Daniel DiCriscio (Bruno movie)
  • Cher Rue (Secret lives of Women)
  • Johnny V ( Scott Baio is 46 and Pregnant)
  • Amanda Rushing (Singer/songwriter)


Sponsors contributed to the event:

http://www.bmi.com/ http://www.fender.com/ http://www.eco-limo.com/ http://www.njoythefreedom.com/


 

 ,

   
 

Thanks for reading Big Girls on the Red Carpet

 

articles@largeincharge.com

Hot & Heavy Entertainment

   

     Stephanie Baham is a native of Los Angeles, CA and now resides in the San Francisco area. She's a 38 year old professional who has long enjoyed the craft of writing. Her other interests include film, theatre, yoga, dancing, literature and politics. Stephanie holds a Bachelor's degree from Cal State University, Long Beach in Theatre Arts. She is currently working towards her degree in Psychology.

   

"I Want to Save Your Life" - A new reality show to help America get healthy or more "fat equals death" propaganda?

with Stephanie Baham



One afternoon I was watching the WE tv channel.  A commercial came on advertising one of their new shows.  This ad starting out with people speaking into the camera saying things like "I want her to be around a long time", "I want her to see the grandchildren grow up", I love her and I don't want her to die"...etc and so on.

I thought this was an ad for another drug intervention show, like the one on A&E called Intervention. The next thing I know....a man walks up to a plus size lady and says "You don't know me but my name is Charles and I'm here to save your life".

I thought to myself..."this isn't a drug intervention...it's a fat intervention!"  The show calls it a Health Intervention....but I don't see anyone filming interventions on people who are underweight.  Why isn't there a show about that?  But I digress....

So is being large the same as being a drug addict?  Is that what this show is advocating?

Here's a piece about the show's premise from WEtv.com:

WE tv’s all-new original series I Want to Save Your Life showcases undercover health interventions by Charles Stuart Platkin, a nutrition and public health advocate, also known as the Diet Detective. After struggling with weight loss in the past, spending most of his childhood and early adulthood overweight, Charles lost more than 50 pounds and has kept it off for more than 10 years. This series, inspired by Charles’s own success, follows him on an incredible mission to bring Americans back to a healthy lifestyle.

I watched online at www.wetv.com/saveyourlife and watched more previews and some episodes.  Charles Stuart Platkin takes each of his clients through a journey geared toward healthy living.  He helps them exercise, cook healthy food and counsels them.  The counseling scenes were mostly large people being brought to tears and talking about their low self-esteem issues.  Charles' solution to the low self-esteem issue is to lose weight. I have an issue with that...but hey I'm not the "Diet Doctor". 

He took one lady to the doctor's office and showed her transparent a 3D image of her body and pointed out where her fat is.  Then he went on about how she is susceptible to diabetes and heart attack.  She started to cry too. There's a lot of crying on this show. It seems the goal here is to break someone down into tears until they agree to go on the weight loss journey. 


I was pleased at Charles' caring nature but he gives his client's this feeling of desperation... as if they need to let him help right away or death will come a knockin'.  I don't see that his clients are motivated by anything positive... but by an overwhelming sense of doom & gloom.

The Diet Doctor does give out some helpful advice on healthy living...which anyone could benefit from.  I was glad to see that he was very thorough when sharing his knowledge on food & exercise.  The man is very intelligent... but I wonder how he views his clients.... as people who are in desperate need of rescue... or people who might benefit from what he has to offer?  Is he trying to be a knight in shining armor for these "victims" of weight & food.... or a helpful source of information and motivation?  It's hard to tell.  I suppose I should stay tuned.

I wonder if these weight loss shows are making things worse for the plus size community.  The point of these shows is this: you should NOT be fat so you must change or you'll DIE! Die die die! Are large people being portrayed in these shows like junkies? Like people who are so addicted they have no control over their lives?  What kind of message does that send to large viewers?  Are these influences from the world of reality tv helping or hurting the emotional state of it's larger viewers?

I think the number of "lose weight or die" shows is on the rise.  I would love to see some shows about plus size people that don't involve victimization. As I've said before....I would love to see plus size people in quality roles in both television & film.  I believe the best way to achieve that is to show support for the shows that have positive plus size characters.

If you would like to check out the Diet Doctor in I Want To Save Your Life, please tune into WEtv or visit them at
www.wetv.com/saveyourlife where you can watch more previews like the one below.

Cheers!

Stephanie Baham

   
 

Thanks for reading Hot & Heavy Entertainment

 

articles@largeincharge.com

DID YOU KNOW?

National and International Plus Size News

 

     I am a former plus-size model and stage performer. I have written articles that have appeared in local newspapers, college magazines and I was a sports editor for my school newspaper. Currently I have a book coming out in May 08, How to Make a Living Without a Job: the Guide to Professional Temping. It will be available online through Amazon and can be ordered through Barnes & Noble or Borders. I split my time between the Bay Area, CA and Houston, TX.

   

War of the Sizes
with Iolande Vitt Argent

 

Sasha Larner                                           Mikyla Dodd

The Daily Mail asked two women to pose for pictures; one is a size 0 (UK size 4) and the other is an 18.  The campaign is to raise awareness of the increasing weight issues in the today’s UK.

Both women appear to eat a healthy balanced diet but nutritionist Fiona Hunter believes that the size zero model, Sasha Larner is eating less than half of the recommended daily calorie intake, and the majority of these are made up of biscuits & alcohol. Fiona had higher praise for the well balanced diet of Mikyla Dodd of Hollyoaks & Celebrity fit club fame.

Sasha Larner, 29, is a model and mother of two boys, Crawford, six, and Presley, three. She lives in Kent with her partner Matthew, 36, a carpenter. She has been a size zero (UK size four) for the past two years.

Sasha says: ‘I find it offensive and insulting, and it makes me angry. When women criticize me for my shape, I just ask them back: "Would you say to a large woman, 'Did you eat all the pies?”’

Both women claim to be happy with their weight, although Mikyla has recently slimmed down from 226 lbs to 210.7 lbs. The 16 pound loss came as a result of taking part in Celebrity fit club.

‘I am perfectly content with my weight. If I never lose another pound, I will be happy. I am a desirable woman. I’ve got great boobs and my last boyfriend said I had a nice bum. I’ve certainly got no inhibitions when it comes to the bedroom. I know for a fact that you don’t have to be slim to be sexy. I feel much better now that I’ve lost some weight - but I’d never want to be a size zero. Pictures of people like Nicole Richie in her swimwear are so worrying. They are all skin and bone, and look as though they might snap.’

“Despite appearing on Hollyoaks, this is the first time I have ever been asked to take my clothes off for a glamorous photo shoot.” Cooed Mikyla.

“Are you incredulous at my audacity in believing the British public may want to see someone of my generous proportions naked? Or are you relieved that amid the size zero hype we are spoon-fed as a misguided interpretation of attractiveness, there's an image of a larger woman looking - if I do say so myself - pretty foxy?”

“I hope you conclude the latter, and that my pictures are the beginning of the womanly woman's fightback.”
   
 

Thanks for reading Did You Know

http://ivargent.spaces.live.com

 

articles@largeincharge.com

The Big GB

My Gastric Bypass Memoirs

Sonya L. Bennett, (also known as “Truthfulblkwoman”) is a 38 year old, black female, single with no children living in Detroit, Michigan.  She is the youngest of a set of fraternal female twins, with a older sister.  Sonya lives with being the larger twin, and discovered people always presumed that they would look alike in SOME way... Even though fraternal twins don't necessarily look alike.  Always being the heavier of the two, people (family, associates, friends) were quick to point it out. She grew to realize an outer appearance is what people judge you on initially.  As a college-educated freelance court stenographer, it never occurred to her that size would prohibit her from receiving work.  In the legal world, the “eye candy” usually didn’t fill UP the corner.

In 2007, Sonya was diagnosed with Type II Diabetes; a generational curse that she had prayed to avoid, but didn’t worry about while she piled butter pecan ice cream on her German Chocolate Cake.    Only a few months into this diagnosis, she woke up one morning unable to walk and in excruciating pain in her left foot.  Doctors finally diagnosed an acute tendonitis, exacerbated by uncontrolled diabetes.  That was the wake-up call, She had suffered for years with high cholesterol and sleep apnea; all associated with her weight,  it wasn’t until this happened (wheelchair bound for a month and on crutches following that) did she tell herself "I have to do something about my weight."  On April 17, 2008, Sonya had the gastric bypass medical weight loss procedure and it was the best decision that she made for herself.  In these upcoming writings, Sonya invites you to learn the ups and downs of gastric bypass: through the eyes of one who lives it every day.

 

Who is Sonya Bennett?

with Sonya Bennett

     My name is Sonya and I am 38 years old.  I have always been a “healthy fat person”, tipping the scales at over 300 pounds, wearing a size 30/32 and proudly, had no obesity-related illnesses.  The epitome of a BBW; an advocate for size acceptance, a warrior against low self-esteem (as it related to weight) among my peers and wore the Badge of Obesity as being a “card I was dealt” and rolled with it (pun intended).  Growing up the larger of a fraternal-twin set, I took the teasing from children (“fat and skinny were in the bed, fat rolled over and skinny was dead!”  “Did you take all the food from your sister in the womb?”, “You two look like the number ‘10’ walking down the street”), the back-handed compliments from family “You have SUCH a pretty face, if only you weren’t so fat!”) and grew up realizing there is a difference between a Fat Admirer (FA) or BBW Admirer and someone who pursues a person of size (much like a leach) that latches on sucking the life out, thinking that because you’re overweight you will settle for anyone just to say that you’re dating.  I learned, being a single BBW, that there were some men who saw big women as ‘loyal, great cooks and desperate’ describing their prey as ones who will satisfy your every need and accept many things that the socially-acceptable “normal-sized woman” wouldn’t (infidelity, disrespect etc.) because they are happy just being with someone.   Of course, there ARE the true ones out there – the warriors who appreciate the curves, the style and the appeal of a true Big Beautiful Women and to those forward-thinking individuals, my hat is off to you and I’ll always be grateful for the love I’ve been shown at any size. 

            I have a family history of heart disease: a maternal grandfather who was not a person of size but suffered a mild heart attack and a mother who succumbed to a massive heart attack at the age of 54.  My physician reveled in the fact that my blood pressure was excellent and I had minimal health problems outside of a mild case of sleep apnea.  As time progress and I became increasingly “fluffier”, health problems arose including a diagnosis of Type II Diabetes, the necessity of a CPAP Machine to sleep with and finally, cholesterol issues: three, silent killers.  At 36 years old, I was pricking my finger twice daily to check my blood sugar and taking almost as many pills as my 80 year old grandmother!  I knew that I needed to change my life, I just did not have the motivation to put forth the efforts needed. 

            Growing up a fat child, my mother worked for a very popular weight-loss facility and placed me on her version of the program to lose weight.  I can recall feeling isolated as my two, thin sisters were allowed to eat whatever they wanted, whenever they wanted and I was placed on meals which included steamed vegetables,  smaller portions, diet pop and no dessert.  When you’re a twin, you expect that you’ll be treated equally and I resented these outward prejudices!  Very introverted, though, I retreated to sneaking food; even ordering pizza deliveries in my teen-aged years and hiding the pizza in my closet where I would eat it in my dark, unsanitary tomb; thinking I was “getting away with” something when I was really hurting myself more than I knew both mentally and physically.  These defining moments prepared me for the love of drive-thru restaurants as I began to drive; ordering food that I would scarf on the drive home and finishing up my gluttonous tirade as I reached my destination.    

            As a health-conscious adult, I jumped on the bandwagon of fitness at different points in my life.  I followed medically and non-medically supervised weight-loss programs, I purchased a lifetime gym membership, I tried the “fad diets”, imbibed in the ‘tricks’; I even underwent hypnotism which seemed to actually make me desire more food!  I would lose and gain, lose and gain; this yo-yo dieting was unhealthy for my body and detrimental to my state of well-being.   It seemed as I would receive compliments as to “how good” I looked when I would lose, it would cause me to reward myself; and what better way to reward myself except with my close, lifelong friend: food.  I needed a drastic change in my thought pattern about food so I began to research surgical weight loss options.  

            Changes do not always come in the way and the time that we would like them to.  After periodically taking my 1000 mgs of Glucophage daily and changing my several-times-daily can of pop to an occasional diet liquid that washed , I woke up one morning in December of 2007 to an excruciating pain in my left foot and an inability to raise my left arm.  I literally could not bear weight on my foot, especially the 335 pounds that my 5’0’’ frame was carrying.  My doctor took x-rays, sent me for an MRI and gave me a painful cortisone injection and finally diagnosed a peripheral neuropathy caused or exacerbated by ill-controlled Diabetes.  Definition:  I wasn’t taking care of the glucose in my body so it was going to take care of me!  At 37 years old, I was confined to a wheelchair and unable to raise my left arm.  It was the beginning of a slow deterioration of my body and it was beyond time to take control of my life, staring with my weight.

            After a year of preparation which included a psychological evaluation (insuring that my mental desires were logical), a series of x-rays, an EKG and a full blood work-up (assuring that I was physically prepared for this very invasive procedure) all results returned stable and my new “birth date” given to me was April 17, 2008.  Though my family physician is connected to a local hospital that performs medical weight loss surgeries, I chose to go to a facility that solely performs these types of procedures: Barix Clinics – www.barixclinics.com

            I hope that this Column will serve as informative, edifying, answers questions for those who are curious, bias or unaware.  I also sincerely welcome comments, statements and thoughts from the readers of LargeInCharge and trust that my continuing experience will be of interest to you.

 
 

Thanks for reading

The Big GB - My Gastric Bypass Memoirs

Sonya's Links:

www.SonyaBennett.com

Sonya Bennett on Facebook

 

Time to tell it like it is!

    

     This is an experiment in Confession, you can anonymously confess, or let everyone know something that you feel.  Every Month we will post all the confessions and you can come and view them and be inspired to make your own.

 

     You can send in a picture,  You can make a graphic,  You can just send in your written words.  You can do it anonymously and get something off your chest.  You can let everyone know who you are and liberate yourself.

 

     Hope you enjoy Confession!  Send in your own check the bottom of this page!

 

CONFESSIONS

 


 

I am going under the knife in a couple of Months,  My friend died because of Gastric Bypass

Now I am getting it.  I rather die than stay the way I am, And I hate myself for feeling this way!

 

****CONFESSION*****

 

 

You tell me you don't know why you love me.  You know you don't want me to lose weight.

Why are you with me?  Love or Weight?

 

 

****CONFESSION*****


 

I would have been getting married this year,  He said he was attracted to me the whole me including my fat.

But then he complains that I cant do everything others can.  I don't think he loved me at all.

 

****CONFESSION*****


 

My Daughter was being harrassed because I am fat.

When i went to her school she had been in a fight.

Another girl told her that her mom was a fat whale.

My child said. 

At least my mom is happy and yours is a meanie who treats everyone bad.

I don't know if I should be sad or proud because my daughter is not ashamed.

 

 

****CONFESSION*****

 

 

 
Send in your own Confession,  Use the email to the Right and send in a your confession, weather it is a graphic you made (NO BIGGER THAN 5x7 92 DPI) or a picture you saw.  You can also just send in text words.  Your Confession can be Anonymous or you can tell everyone who you are.

Send in your Confession NOW!

Thanks for reading Confession

Send in your Confession to

articles@largeincharge.com

 

Large In Charge Guest Spot

We want to hear and see your talents!

 

One of our favorite parts of the Magazine.  The Guest Spot is for our readers to submit there talents to be viewed.  We want to see all you wonderful supporters making moves of your own.  If you write poetry, short stories, commentaries, or just thoughts in general, please submit them to us.  If your a designer we want to see pictures of your clothing.   We would love to include your talents in our newsletter.  We hope you take an active part in the L.I.C. newsletter. Send in your article, poetry, comments to - articles@largeincharge.com

NOTE: The Opinion of the writer is not always the opinion of The Large in Charge Staff.  We support the Right to all views.  We do not Condemn or Approve writing based on our personal thoughts.  We approve writing based on if the subject is a concern for the BBW / SSBBW / BHM Community.  Thank you for your writing and please send in those articles!  - The Large in Charge Staff

Writers Search

WRITERS SEARCH

Looking for new Writers for 2009

 

 

About Our Writers Search:

     LargeInCharge is looking for Volunteer Writers for our Online Magazine.  We are looking for Males and Females who wants to write about issues that concern large people.  We need people who will be dedicated to writing columns or doing an interview once a month in a timely manner.  You do not need to be a professional writer,  Good writing, and typing skills, the ability to spell check, understand grammar and have your article sent in on time is what we are looking for.

 

     We want to bring the voice of the people to the people.  Give them something they can related to and enjoy on a monthly basis.

 

    LargeInCharge is a non-profit Online magazine which is why we are asking for Volunteer's.  This is a great opportunity to brush up on your writing skills and learn different writing styles.

 

NOTICE:  This is not a responsibility to be taken lightly.  You must be able to hand in one article on time monthly for a period of at least 12 months.  If you wish to continue after 12 months then you may stay if your track record is good.

 

We are looking for writers for the following Positions.

  • A Big Man's World - a writer who will write about living life as a Big Man in this Society.

  • Product Review - A writer to search for and find products that are beneficial for plus sized people.

  • Make- up, Medicine and Body - External to internal make your body feel and look great!

  • Inspiration - Inspirational stories, interviews and articles on loving yourself as is.

  • My Life Before and After Gastric bypass - we are looking for a writer who will document there life before and after this controversial surgery.  Positive and Negative experiences are welcome.

  • The Erotic Phatty - Erotic stories and poetry for the Full Figured form.

 

Would you like to be a writer?  If you have an idea for a column let me know.

 

 

HOW TO APPLY TO BE A WRITER!!!

 

Interested in applying for a writers position?

 

     Send in the information below along with a clear photograph of yourself and one complete article at least 300 words.  Please make sure your article is matching the position your applying for.  If you are a versatile writer and applying for more than one position send in one article for each position.

 

     Any submissions maybe be used in the magazine as a guest article or other wise if you do not receive a position.  If you are picked for a position it will be used as a back up for your column in case of emergency.

 

I want to Apply for a Writers Position:

 

My Name is:

My email address is:

My Phone Number is:

My location/address is:

The position I am applying for is:

 

Here is my article:

 

I am allowing LargeInCharge to use my image and article as they see fit.  By typing my name and date I understand that I agree to the above.   NAME/DATE

 

Send to: raqui@largeincharge.com

 

Thank you

Send in your Work to Appear in LargeInCharge

We love our guest writers, they help us to make LargeInCharge more personal and reader friendly place.  We bring the people words from there own peers.  If you always wanted to write but never knew what to do with your thoughts and opinions.  Send them in to us we love to feature you in our guest spot.

 

What type of entries do we accept?

  • Original Articles that have not been placed in publication.

  • Size Empowerment Stories

  • Discovery of Size Acceptance

  • Romance of Large Size

  • Poetry - at least 25 lines in length

  • Complaints about Society

  • Complaints about what is provided for Big People

  • Complaints about Health Care

  • Weight Loss Surgery Experiences

  • Dealing with Doctors

  • The Joy of being Big

  • Learning to Love yourself

  • etc.

How to Submit my Article for review?

  • Check your article for spelling and correct format, We do not edit articles.
  • Attach your article either in Word, Text Format, or in the Body of your email.
  • In your email send your Real Name, E-mail and Address (state, location).
  • Under your Name and Address include date, and the line. "I give www.largeincharge.com and there owners, permission to use my written article. I am submitting it for there use at their discretion."
  • Include a picture if you so wish in .jpg or .gif format and a brief description of yourself.
   

Send in your stories, poems, etc. to

articles@largeincharge.com

 

Large In Charge

Fashion Furious

BBW/BHM Fashion of the Month

     We all hate how the Fashion Industry is just scratching the surface when it comes to Large Sized Fashion.  But I have found out that many clothing stores and online companies are beginning to take up the slack.  Creative BBW, SSBBW and BHM's are making there own clothing or mix matching and finding basic everyday wear and night club wear. 

     Making it affordable is what can be hard so showcase your wonderful finds here.  If your a regular shopper, sew your own clothing or a designer showcase your clothing here by submitting a picture for Fashion Furious of the month.

 

Fashion Furious of the Month

How to send in your Fashion Find. Send a Clear Picture as an attachment

and use the Format Below to describe your Fashion Furious picture.

Email to Raqui:  articles@largeincharge.com

 

Fashion Find by: Raqui

Fashion Type:  SPRING MOTHER'S DAY SALE

Why I Like this Item: SUPER SALE EVERYTHING IS CHEAP AND AFFORDABLE GET IT WHILE ITS HOT!!! Sizes up to 7xl with lots of things to choose from including SWIMWEAR!!!

 

Woman Within - www.womanwithin.com

 

 

   

Send in your Fashion Furious Picture and Details to

articles@largeincharge.com

Large In Charge

Product of the Month!

What is good for Big Sized Bodies

 

    A very important and necessary part of LargeInCharge.  Find out what is helpful for big bodies.  Keep your self straight with some of our tips and tricks. Find out what other Big Sized people use to keep themselves smelling, feeling, looking, and living a proper life.  What kind of products are allowed. Anything that deal with the body. From cleaning aids to soap, lotions, powder, healing aids etc.  anything that can help a big body!

NOTE: The Opinion of those who submit items are not professional.  They are everyday people who found something that worked for them.  We are not held responsible for there opinion - The Large in Charge Staff

Send your favorite Item to be Product of the Month - Follow format below, include a picture of product (most can be found online) and Send to articles@largeincharge.com

Product of the Month

About the Product

Recommender: Raqui

Name of Product: HoMedics Automatic Blood Pressure Monitor (WRIST)


Type of Product: Blood Pressure Monitor

Cost of Product: $89.99

Where Product can be found: www.sears.com 


Description:

Wrist monitor.  Super Sized Digits. Clinically proven accuracy.  120 Memory recall.  2 Users, batteries and storage bag included.



Why I like this Product:
I think that everyone should have a blood pressure monitor in the home.  This one is very convenient because it is placed on the wrist.  No worrying about the big cuff because Plus Sized people have bigger arms.  Compact enough to take on trips and is handy to monitor your own levels.

 

 

Send in your Product recommendation to

articles@largeincharge.com

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