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LargeInCharge Magazine - Eighth Year in Progress

 Issue#93 - December 2011

Welcome to LargeInCharge Magazine

In this Issue of L.I.C.




Words of Wisdom from the Heart & Mind of Raqui

From the Plus Side ~ Emily Smiltneck


Good 4 U Food  ~ Xander


The Big GB My Gastric Bypass Memoirs - Soyna Bennett


From the Desk of NAAFA

National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance


Fashion & Products with The WebGirl ~ Lucia Roth


Fattitude - Its a Fat way of Life ~ Pat Llewellyn


The BIG - Beautiful Inspirational Girl  ~ Ms Suga


Big Girl, Small World - Gabriela Falarz


LargeInChargeDating - Dating for the Large People who are going to be in Charge of their Love Lives!


LargeInCharge Friends - The Place for Big People to make Friends and maybe MUCH MORE!

LargeInCharge Writer's Search 
Have your own Column in
LargeInCharge Magazine!

Have your own Column in LargeInCharge Magazine APPLY NOW!

By: Raqui plus Online Sources


Looking for new Writers for 2012



About Our Writers Search:

     LargeInCharge is looking for Volunteer Writers for our Online Magazine.  We are looking for Males and Females who wants to write about issues that concern large people.  We need people who will be dedicated to writing columns/interview once a month in a timely manner.  You do not need to be a professional writer,  Good writing, typing skills, the ability to spell check, understand grammar and have your article sent in on time is what we are looking for.


     We want to bring the voice of the people to the people.  Give them something they can related to and enjoy on a monthly basis.


    LargeInCharge is a non-profit Online magazine which is why we are asking for Volunteer's.  This is a great opportunity to brush up on your writing skills, expand your writing experience and portfolio, or to learn different writing styles.


NOTICE:  This is not a responsibility to be taken lightly.  You must be able to hand in one article on time monthly for a period of at least 12 months.  You will be asked to give in three stand by articles for you column for emergency purposes.  If you wish to continue after 12 months then you may stay if your track record is good.


We are looking for writers for the following Positions.

  • A Big Man's World - a writer who will write about living life as a Big Man in this Society.

  • Make- up, Medicine and Body - External to internal make your body feel and look great!

  • All Natural - Natural Remedies that help the body be balanced. Catering to Plus Sized People

  • Loving my Big Lady - From a Man who loves big women... to the Big women of the world.

  • Fashion Find - Someone to search for and find Fashions and sales.

  • Inspiration - Inspirational stories, interviews and articles on loving yourself as is.

  • Plus Sized Entertainment - Interesting Plus Sized people on TV and in theater.


Would you like to be a writer? Apply following the directions below.


     Send in the information below along with a clear photograph of yourself and one complete article at least 500 words.  Please make sure your article is matching the position your applying for.  If you are a versatile writer and applying for more than one position send in one article for each position. If you have an idea for your column which doesn't fit the above categories please give details about your idea for the column along with your sample


     Any submissions maybe be used in the magazine as a guest article or other wise if you do not receive a position.  If you are picked for a position it will be used as a back up for your column in case of emergency.


I want to Apply for a Writers Position:


My Name is:

My email address is:

My Phone Number is:

My location/address is:

The position I am applying for is:


Here is my article:


I am allowing LargeInCharge to use my image and article as they see fit.  By typing my name and date I understand that I agree to the above.   NAME/DATE


Send to:


Thank you


Thank you for Reading The LargeInCharge Feature



Vote for our Cover Model of the Year!

 Apply to be a 2012 Cover Model


Issue #84 - March 2011

Issue #85 - April 2011

Issue #86 - May 2011

Issue #87 - June 2011

Issue #88 - July 2011

Issue #89 - August 2011

Issue #90 - September 2011

Issue #91 - October 2011

Issue #92 - November 2011
Back Issues do not have a Voting Poll.


2012 LargeInCharge Cover Model Sponsors:

  • StarBurstGlass. - a diachronic glass pendant  - Value $30. - Visit the Facebook Group Buy BBW to see more Starburst Glass - CLICK HERE
  • Bubbles and Babbles Original Gift Basket - Value $30.00 - To see more CLICK HERE for the Facebook Page

APPLY NOW to be a LargeInCharge Cover Model for 2012!





 It has been almost Eight years since LargeInCharge opened its online doors to the Big World.  We started with 740 readers March 2004.  We have built up to over 800,000 readers a month.  We have continuously given the Big World article after article.  Fashion tips and clothing companies.   Hot events and self-esteem advice. Interesting information and cool products.  We have changed, grown and become better.  Online Magazines are the big now, doing better than physical paper magazines.  Any successful magazine must have an online presence.  LargeInCharge has been leading the way for the Plus Sized Community.


     Now with our Seventh annual Cover Model Search taking place we are beaming with pride.  LargeInCharge keeps our entrance to be a cover model free by using photographs that the person submits for our covers. We don’t ask for an entry or submission fee from our models.  All we ask for is clear good photographs that would be considered portfolio type of pictures. At the end of the year we have a voting for the public and name one of them Cover Model of the Year he or she wins prizes and possibly money from our sponsors depending on what our sponsors give that year.


     Being a LargeInCharge cover model can be a great add on to your comp card or resume.  It can also be a feather in the cap of aspiring models.  So many beautiful and handsome big men and women who are not professional models can now be featured where they will be appreciated.  NO MORE SIZE 18 or 2XL ONLY MODELS.  AGE DOESN'T MATTER.  NO MORE FETISH ONLY PICTURES. We like them professional and in all sizes INCLUDING SUPER SIZED.  There are no limits with us.





NOTICE - Follow the Directions carefully, if you have a question you can email me and ask before you send in your entry.  Any Entries that are not sent in properly will be thrown out. Take the time to send in your entry properly.

Raqui does not Guide, Help, Preview, Custom Pick Photos of any model or submission. It is unfair to all applicants. All Males and Females are free to enter and encouraged to submit according to guidelines. - Thank you

Send In the following - You must send at least two of each.

·         One or more Head shot Black & White / Color - in your modeling attire

·         One or more Full body shot Black & White / Color - in your modeling attire

NOTE: the more pictures you send it the better.

Type of pictures

·         Digital or scanned pictures only


·         The Picture must represent you in your Current State

·         Pictures must be of one person, no group shots.

·         Pictures of Big Males and Females only.

·         Pictures must be clear with no watermarks. (EXCEPTION: photographers watermark)

·         Pictures cannot be smaller than 300 DPI, 800 x 600 pixels

·         Pictures must be tasteful and fully clothed - Swimsuit and tasteful lingerie is allowed.

·         Nude is not allowed unless it is artistic.  No private areas shown.

·         If your pictures are professionally done be sure to have permission from the photographer.



Cell Phone Camera Images

Pictures with distracting backgrounds  - example: clutter

Webcam pictures

Pictures with Multiple people or with multiple people in the background

Poor lighting or photo shopped edited images

Images that do not meet the size requirement.



Pictures are well lit, clear and centered, background is clear and natural, proper size.

You are free to browse our past cover models to get an idea of what we are looking for.



Picture Categories - You can send in pictures for any of the below categories

·         Professional - done by photographer

·         Winter - Winter wear, coats etc. and Seasonal type of clothing, costumes and colors.  Winter backgrounds scenes

·         Spring - Spring wear, sweaters etc. bright, airy, wind blown. Spring backgrounds scenes

·         Summer - Swimsuits, wraps, summer dresses. Summer background scenes

·         Fall - Fall colors and sweaters.  Earthy natural settings. Fall Colors.

·         Ethnic - Ethnic prints and colors.  Ethnic combinations of fabric and prints.  Jewelry

·         Business - Suite and tie. City backgrounds

·         Sporty - Sports clothing of all types. Participating in sports. Jogging, walking, basketball, football, skating. Etc.

·         Exercise - In exercise outfits, gym scene etc.

·         Gothic - Gothic clothing and costumes etc.





DOWNLOAD the following text file read and complete and send along with your pictures.



What will I receive if I am picked to be a 2011 Cover Model

·         You will be Showcased for the Month you appear as our Cover Model, appear on the cover and remain in our database.

·         You will be entered in our Yearly Cover Model contest to win a Trophy and Prizes at the end of the year. 

·         For the Cover Model of the Year - you will be featured as COVER MODEL OF THE YEAR for the New Years February edition. You will be required to update us with pictures and a statement.


Thanks for reading about our

Cover Model of the Month



     Raqui the Owner and Founder of, Raqui's  "Tell it like it is" style of writing has brought thousands to her blogs and millions to  There is so much behind the woman who has brought this magazine into existence.  Being Internationally known as a wrestler/squasher lead the way to modeling for companies and being featured in magazines and documentaries from all over the world.  She has made a career out of her size and personality. Born, Raised and Residing in the Bronx NYC. This city girl is taking the world by storm.


     For the past 6 years Raqui officially moved into Size Acceptance and Empowerment.  With the creation of LargeInCharge she took what she said to individuals to a higher level and made it public to the internet world. She is a woman who doesn't let things get to her.  Knock her down for the moment but she will rise up stronger and better.  Being a speaker on behalf of many subjects and counseling Plus Sized people online her grace and style has made people love her.  Raqui continues to set an example of a powerful woman who will bend the world to fit her, her way.


     Raqui's appearances include, Uk Television, German TV, Japan, Europe, Sweden and the Spanish circuit.  Her many magazines appearances have been world wide.  She has hit American Television in 2006 with Good Morning American and since has appeared on The Cristina Show,  The Maury Show and The Tyra Banks Show.

To view her Online portfolio visit

Raqui's New Blog titled Raqui-ism "Soulfully Speaking! -

 Raqui Host's Super Sized Seminar at 15th Annual Vegas Bash 2011

go to Portfolio Section

Raqui-ism -  Thanksgiving Really? 36 reasons why I am Thankful.

Written By: Raqui


With Thanksgiving just passing I had many mixed feelings. Thanksgiving is a Holiday that has always hit me with bad thoughts, knowing everything behind it. I often think about the suffering and slaughter of my fellow brothers and sisters (The Native American).

I couldn't get over the past, to be thankful. In my personal goal of decreasing the negativity in my life, I will remember the past but also be thankful for what I do have.

I will be sharing what I am really truly thankful for, right here with all of you. One for every year I am alive... to remind myself that with everything I went through in my life, it really isn't that bad.

36 reasons why I am Thankful Starting NOW…

What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 1 - I am thankful that I live with conveniences that to this day, do not exist for many people. Our Poor have convinces that only the rich have in other countries, Running clean water, toilets, delivery, washing machines, driers, microwaves, a soft bed, air condition, heat, lights, reliable electricity and much more.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 2 - I am thankful that I am alive and safe. There are many people (just in the last month alone) that have lost their life. People who are dying, scared, being abused, in pain, hurting others or themselves. I am here alive, eating chocolate and yummy things. Living, breathing, smiling, sitting comfy in my bed, my biggest decision today will be when I decide to roll out of it. I am truly a fortunate person.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 3 - I am thankful that I live here in America. We have a beautiful land that most ignore. Our country may have been built on horrors, at least we can fight for our rights. Socially we have advanced faster than most other countries. Yes it was hard but we are here and still trying. At least we can try to make it better or hate the changes, because we have the freedom to do so.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 4 - I am thankful that I am a well-rounded person. I have a strong variety of interests, I am not an expert on any one subject but I have been gifted to be strongly knowledgeable in most things. I have been given a brain that is multifaceted and a strong DOSE of common sense. With this I can relate to most people and also join in with most circles.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 5 - That financially I am OK. I can pay my bills and take care of myself. Give a little to a cause or maybe help out someone in great need. I am very far from rich. But with only me to take care of my needs are slight and I am relatively stress free for the first time in my life.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 6 - I am thankful for my health. I do not currently have any disease. I am fat as hell but I am still walking around looking fly. I eat what I want and adjust accordingly. I have been given great height, muscle and bones to carry a great weight. I have been given a strong system to fight disease. RIGHT NOW the only extremes my body is going through is the fact that my heart is so big it had to spread out all over my body. BUT HEY i hear you like it like that :)


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 7 - THIS IS A HARD ONE - Life has not been kind to me. I have suffered through many hardships. My first memory in life was an abusive scene. From the beginning I have witness or been a victim of some very bad things. I can’t remember a time in my life, not even in childhood, that I wasn't living with stress, hurt even despair. My brain has always been fighting and doing something to counter act the hardships happening to me/around me. To somehow make it ok to keep going, because look here is this good thing I'm trying to achieve or help out with. But Right here and now I finally have found PEACE and I am not going back to the way it was.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 8 - I am Thankful for my looks. Not for the conventional reasons. If I didn't have this face, this hair, if I didn't have this tone, my skin, if my face wasn't acceptable by society and people. I wouldn't be nearly as successful at helping others the way I do. Unfortunate but true. If I was… let’s say it UGLY, I would have been pushed under the rug, my words thrown to the side. There are friends I wouldn't have made, appearances never had, opportunities never given. With my body being so unacceptable by certain standards, maybe i was given these looks to use and make myself visible. So that eyes could be opened and so that things could change. So that acceptance of body can then turn into the acceptance of Humanity.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 9 - I am thankful for Courage. When it comes to facing things, I have been able to drum up the Courage to move forward. Maybe not at the times others would have wanted but always at the right time for me. When I am ready I jump in... No help... no ropes.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 10 - THE INTERNET, because of the net I have been able to reach out to people, make friends, create connections. I have been able to serve my community and try to make a difference for people. I have been able to make money and share what is me with others. We could never achieve this without the net.


What I am really truly thankful for: 11 - comedy nothing makes me happier than a good comedy to change my mood.


What I am really truly thankful for: 12 - I'm thankful for birth control or else I would be like the old woman who lived in the shoe with so many children she didn't know what to do.


What I am really truly thankful for: 13 - thankful that my mother pushed me to be a good reader it helped me with my writing.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 14 - For the Friends who became family. Blood maybe thicker than water… But Water gives life and blood can poison and kill you.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 15 - I am thankful that I do have food daily, when I was younger some time ago, I didn't know when I would eat or what. When skipping days without food was a regular thing and learning to not feel the cold and hunger pains was just living. When you learn to eat… without tasting, because as long as you can put something in your stomach you were ok. Now I get to pick what I want and not have to eat something just because it’s there.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 16 - I am thankful for the men in my life who were good men. Who showed me that men (even young men) can really be men and that women no matter what size or shape were women and should be treated and protected as such.

What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 17 - I am thankful for every person who hit me, beat me, raped me, threaten me, bullied me, abused me, molested me, and laughed or was happy at my tears of despair. You all taught me what friendship is not, what relationships are not supposed to be like, what sexual depravity really is, and how to see a predator ahead of time. You made me able to help others, teach others, and shine a light on the negative so that others can bring positive things into their lives. By living through it I am stronger, better, more caring, more knowledgeable, and humble to the suffering of all.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 18 - Thankful for my body, height and size. There are times being this large saved my life.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 19 - Supermarkets, I don’t know if I would want to kill my own animals and eat them. I rather buy them at the market.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 20 - CHOCOLATE and all of its associates like chocolate milk, chocolate candy, hot chocolate, chocolate syrup. Chocolate is just good and i like it so much. So thankful that is doesn't affect my complexion as well.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 21 - Cell Phones I remember the days of quarters, nickel and dimes at the pay phone. NO WAY, so happy to have cell phones in my life.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 22 - Travel, most people stay in one place all their lives and are happy that way. I love travel, to see things in different places. Being exposed to different people, and their lifestyle, the customs and traditions. What they grew up with and how it differs from mine. I really enjoy that.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 23 - I am thankful that I didn't wait my whole life to live it. Most of us do things in life not because it was a plan. Because there was a need and we met that need because it was the right thing to do. Things seem to just happen in our lives and we roll with it. We sit what we want for our lives to the side until later. Later never comes for most of us, the fact that I was able to get past all of that to now do the things I want to with my life is an exhilarating experience.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 24 - For all the people who reach out and contact me, sometimes it’s just a friendly email or note, a message, a post, Something to say Hi I thought of you, something you said was cool, or even just in need of some advice. When someone says Hi to me it really feels nice.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 25 - I am so Thankful for naps, I love a good nap. When it rains sometimes looking out the window while it rains with a hot cup of chocolate and my blanket is all I need to settle down and have a nice nap. Hmmm…


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 26 - Time I am thankful I have been gifted with the talent and time to do what I do for my Plus Sized and Human community. It really is a blessing :)


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 27 - Thankful for my LargeInCharge Volunteers who write articles, come to the show, host my show when I am busy, co-host with me to make it more fun, commentators who give lots of varied opinions, guests who have the courage to call in and lay it on the line. It is great to know others want to dedicate some of their time as well :)


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 28 - For my Freedom of Speech, without the freedom to say what we want, when we want to. We wouldn't be able to reach out and make changes. That freedom is one of the most important ones we have. What we do with it is what makes the difference.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 29 - I know some people might laugh others will be like EWW SHE NASTY. But I am thankful for Orgasms, without them sex and sensuality end up lacking and you will always be left unfulfilled. Why would we even have sex and then babies? We were designed quite beautifully so that when we share a special moment with a special skilled person we are given a MARVELOUS REWARD!


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 30 - I am thankful for ice cream especially caramel sundaes with the bananas and all :) I want one now :)


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 31 - I am thankful for the simple things, the beautiful, the strange, and the things that make you laugh for just a moment. The things that make you wonder why, what or if in a just because I am thinking about it way. They make life interesting and fascinating :)


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 32 - The sense's we have, to taste, to see, to smell, to hear, to feel. If we didn't have any one of these senses we feel something is missing. That I am able to have all of mine makes me feel quite lucky.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 33 - I am Thankful for Music, Art, the many ways we use our creative natures to make amazing works. To create and play instruments, to sing with our voices. When we use our hands to make items, whether they are for daily use or purely decorative. These crafts make live so fresh and bright.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 34 - Thankful for the Heroes in our world. In whatever form they may come. A badge or uniform doesn't make you one automatically. Your spirit does, our veterans, officers, firemen, the guy down the block who saved a young girl from kidnapping. The woman who call the firemen and they came in time to save lives. The person who got in the middle… when they saw injustice, The dog that saved their owners from an attacker. The neighbor who thought something was fishy and went by their instincts. We have so many heroes around and we never see them or recognize them.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 35 - For the things that make my feel content. A good breakfast, nice hot cup of cocoa or flavorful chicken broth, a friendly puppy/dog, a feel good movie, working on a new hobby, listening to music loud while driving on an empty road, herbal medicine, wearing kick ass shoes with a titty dress and getting those LOOKS! These are just a few things that make me feel content and put a little zing in my life on any given day.


What I am Really Truly Thankful for: 36 MY LAST AND FINAL - What I am Really Thankful for. My life, what I learned, who I have become. I am not perfect but at every stage in my life I know that I tried my best. I had hardships and issues to deal with. I had to learn and mature and see beyond certain things. I had to get more and more common sense with time, and sure I did some stupid things. But I know in my heart I did try the best I could have at the time. With all the limitations, I had at different times in my life, and with my brain still learning and adjusting. I look back, and can say, I tried my best. For some it wasn't good enough, and for others it was much more than they could ever do. I am proud that I always tried and will keep trying to do my best.




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From the Plus Side


Emily Smiltneck

     From the Plus side will be column dedicated to short stories that deal with all aspects of Plus size Life.  Emily Smiltneck was chosen for this position because of her dedication, and realistic writing style. She captures the emotional and mental rollercoaster those who are Plus Sized go through.


     Emily Susanne Smiltneck lives in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan (pretty much dead center in the middle of nowhere). She is a substitute teacher, and has recently started a tutoring business. Emily is currently working on several writing projects, including a historical fiction novel and several collections of poetry.

Emily Smiltneck receives recognition in Neighbors Daily Press - See article below


     It is a great joy when our fellow Plus Sized people receive recognition for their life's work.  Join me in this Joyous moment when one of our LargeInCharge writers is seen for her contribution and great dedication to her goals in life.  Click the images above to read the article about our dear Emily. When the page open click on the article to zoom in and read it.


The Adventures of Phatgurl

by Emily Suzanne Smiltneck  


The Adventures Of Phatgurl is a serial collection of stories about the adventures of Jany, a plus-sized young woman who, in desperation, places an ad on a personals website.  As she embarks on her dates, she meets many different kinds of men who expect many different things from her.  Some of her adventures are wildly amusing and others are more serious and even sad. 


If you have any ideas or experiences, funny or otherwise, that you would like to see depicted in a future Phatgurl story, please e-mail me at  I will do my very best to incorporate all reader ideas into future columns.  Thanks!


The Ad (Part 2)

SWSSBBW seeks SM who will not rape her, emotionally or otherwise.  The ability to both speak and write in complete sentences is a plus.  Must not inadvertently throw her down stairs or pretend that she is “Mama.”  Intelligent conversation, a little respect, and the lack of a current significant other will get you far.  And a well-developed sense of humor won’t hurt, either.  If you like smart chicks with jelly bellies and thunder thighs, reply to






“Jany?” Haroon whispered, when he managed to stop laughing.  “I am sorry.”

            “Sorry?  For what?”

            “I do not usually sleep with women like this.”

            “You mean with two other people in the bed, or without your pants on?” Jany giggled.

            “I mean I do not sleep with women this soon.  I know we did not make love last night, but I feel like I should not have been sleeping with you with—with no pants.  I really like you, Jany, and I’d like to spend more time with you.  I do not want you to think I am the sort of man who—“

            “Did you seriously just say ‘make love’?”  Selena sat abruptly upright.  “Who says that anymore?  Really?”

            “I—why—yes, I did,” Haroon stammered.

            “So you love her?  You’re saying you love her.  Because it seems like you gotta, like, love someone to make love to them.  Otherwise, it’s just sex.”

            “Selena, shut up!” Jany hissed.  “I think we all know what he meant.  As if waking up in a bed with like a million other people isn’t awkward enough, now we’re trying to have a serious conversation and you have to make that awkward, too?”

            “I’m not the one who decided to have a serious conversation while I was in bed with a million other people.  It’s not like I was trying to listen or something!”  Selena threw her arms in the air in frustration, almost slapping Jacob in the face as he sat up.  He wrapped his hand around her wrist and brought her arm back down to her side.

            “Looks like someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed, Selena.  And Jany.  Come on, girls.  Kiss and make up.”

            Selena and Jany glared at one another.  Haroon, who hadn’t said anything since Selena’s outburst, had scooted so far back he was nearly falling out of the bed and was watching silently. 

            “This is no time for being crabby,” Jacob continued.  “We had a great night last night, a really wonderful time, and now Haroon and I are in bed with two beautiful women.  Let’s not ruin it by fighting.”

            Jany was pretty sure she knew what the problem was.  After everything they’d been through the previous day—Jany’s frantic call to Selena for help, their flirtations at the bar, Jany’s insistence that Selena was her date—Selena probably hadn’t been overly impressed by Haroon’s confession of his feelings for Jany.  And Jany felt a little guilty, even though his confession hadn’t been her idea.  Should she say something to indicate to him that she didn’t feel the same way?  That wouldn’t be fair; she wasn’t sure how she really did feel.  The fact that Selena was soaking up Jacob’s attention had sort of made her forget that she’d promised that she was Selena’s date for the night.

Jany did the only thing she could think of that might break the tension without saying something to hurt either Selena or Haroon: she followed Jacob’s instructions.  She reached up, grabbed Selena’s head, and pulled it toward her.  As Selena gasped in surprise, Jany kissed her, long and hard.  Their eyes locked again, more in surprise or even horror than in passion, and when they pulled apart, both held their breath.  Haroon, round-eyed, had risen up on one elbow to watch.  Jacob smiled broadly.

            “Thank you, Jany.  Didn’t that help?”

            Neither of them answered.  Instead, they continued to stare, unsure whether their standoff was over or not.  Finally, Jany tipped her head to the side and silently mouthed, “Come on,” at Selena.  And then, just as Haroon hesitantly whispered, “You should do that again, Jane,” Selena leaned over and kissed Jany in return.  Everything was okay.

            “This is very, very different from how I thought my Sunday morning would be,” Haroon said.  “I thought I would wake up by myself, very early, and drink some coffee, and then I would spend the day studying.  Instead, I slept with other people and now—well, this is interesting, isn’t it?”

            Jacob laughed heartily.

            “I thought that maybe you two were the kissin’ kind.  After all, I was there in the bar last night.  To be honest, that was part of what motivated me to bring you all back here last night.”

            “Pervert!” Selena spat, but she was smiling now.

            “We’re not—well, I’m not—I mean, I like guys too.  So does she.  Really, I mainly like guys.  I just—well, Selena’s the only—I--we’ve—oh, God, never mind.”  Jany flushed bright red. 

            “No need to explain.  I think Haroon over there is glad to hear ya like boys.  He probably wouldn’t complain if ya kissed her again, though.  With less clothes on.”

            “She was right.  You really are a pervert.  And I’m not sure that’s really what Haroon wants..”

            “I do,” Haroon sighed.

            “So you felt funny waking up next to me without pants on because you thought I might get the wrong idea about what kind of guy you are, but you have no problem with me getting naked right in front of you?  With another girl?  How’s that for a double standard?”

            “I—I just mean that I would not think badly of you.  You are both beautiful.  I would like to see that.”  Even Haroon’s skin wasn’t dark enough to hide the fact that he was blushing.

            “Let’s not fight again, girls.  We’re all here together, now, and we may as well enjoy ourselves,” Jacob said gently.

            “Jany?  I think they’re totally trying to talk us into an orgy,” Selena whispered.

            “I heard that, and no, we’re not.  I don’t like that word.  Haroon isn’t trying to talk you into anything; he can barely talk at all, in fact.  And I was merely suggesting that the two of you should enjoy yourselves, here, in my bed, and that if the mood strikes us, Haroon and I may enjoy you as well.”

            “Well, now this is all just weird.  I don’t usually get naked and start making out on command,” Jany said, lying down and hiding her face in a pillow.

            “Performance anxiety.  It’s only natural.  Just relax and do what you’d do if you were alone.”

            “Oh, you mean start talking about how much men suck?  ‘Cause that’s how it usually starts.  Let me out.  I gotta pee.”  Selena shoved Jacob’s legs to the side and climbed out of the bed.

            Selena left an uncomfortable silence behind her when she exited the room.  Jacob shrugged, then threw back the blankets and wandered out after her.  “May as well get up, I guess,” he mumbled.  Haroon got up and followed him.  Jany, not sure exactly what she should do, stayed in the bedroom, but she got out of bed, too, and walked over to the window.  The view was almost as pretty as it had been at dawn.  The sun and the sky were amazingly bright and clear, and the two together seemed to magnify the colors of everything that existed underneath them.

            “Hey, Jane!”  Jany turned around to see Selena hiding behind the half-closed door.


            “They’re out in the kitchen.  We should—you know.  We should do what they wanted us to do.”

            “You mean get naked and make out?”


            “Why, Selena?  I mean, they’re not even in here.  It would just be us.”

            “I’m kinda in the mood now, though.  I mean, after everything—and they’re not here to make us feel weird about it.”

            “Are you just doing this to try and make me forget about Haroon?  I know it probably wasn’t that cool for you to hear the stuff he was saying before, but don’t worry about it.  I don’t even know him that well—“

            “Jane, shut up.  I just wanna kiss you.  Nothing to do with either of them, ‘kay?  I just wanna, like, mess around.  We were pretty hot an’ heavy last night ourselves, you know.  At the bar?  Jacob even noticed.”

            Jany giggled nervously and glanced toward the kitchen.  Jacob and Haroon seemed to be keeping themselves busy.

            “Yeah, we kinda were.  I just—“ Selena walked across the room and stopped her from talking by kissing her.  Then she led Jany across the room and gently pushed her onto the bed.

            “Let’s get naked.”

            “What if they come back in?”

            “You really think they’re gonna mind?”

            In answer, Jany slowly stretched her arms into the air.  Selena took the hint and slid Jany’s shirt up and over her arms, then removed her own top.  She pressed breasts against Jany’s breasts and pressed her lips against Jany’s lips.  Jany wanted to stop her, wanted to say that she just wasn’t sure, that she was afraid of what might happen if Haroon and Jacob came back, but when she opened her mouth, she moaned softly instead.  Without her permission, her legs parted and made room for one of Selena’s legs to find a place between them.  And then, in the distance, she heard Jacob’s voice trying to speak quietly but failing.

            “Now this is what I was waiting for!”



Thanks for reading

From the Plus Side with Emily Smiltneck


Emily's Cool Links


     Xander brings blend of life experience and culinary twist to his writing. From cooking on television and live demonstrations, to writing Xander cook’s like he feels. A former Chicago native transplanted to Tennessee, His goal has been to experience the fullness of food heritage. He believes that as a people and society, can learn a lot from what we eat. Combining a great life lesson and a easy recipe.  They go hand-in-hand to provide a tasty addition to your day. Xander has to confess that ingredients in a great meal are like the ingredients in a great life are never far apart.



My Bag of Hope

by Xander The Food Dude



My job forces me to see the pain that others suffer through on a daily basis.  I see it all levels.  It can be physical, emotional, intellectual, or any other of a host of hurts.  At this time of year, even in a time of short supplies, there are those people who involve themselves in helping others.  However, there are those who unselfishly engage in the activity of helping others all year long.  One of these groups is one that is near and dear to my heart.


There is a local group of ladies who make duffle bags for the children in our Department of Children’s Services.  Each bag is filled with toys, necessities, and a handmade quilt.  When we get children who have to come into the office and stay for a while waiting for placement, they are given one of these bags.  They come designed for different aged children, however the effect is quite similar.  Picture a child having been neglected or abused being brought in the office.  A little face with the dried path of where tears had been are evident on a downturned face.  A little soul who should never been harmed in such a way.  Even worse still, that mind in the child blaming themselves for having been assaulted.  There is no hope.  They are taken to a cubicle where the sit quietly, scared, and alone.  Despite the abuse they have received, they only want to go back home at this point.  Again, they blame themselves.  They repeat over and over again, I’ll be good, I promise,….. I promise.  They have no hope. They have nothing except the clothes they are wearing.


A bag is presented to them, being told that this is theirs to keep.  The are scared to touch it.  Older hands help open the bag revealing the first of a few treasures in the bag.  More often then not it is a stuffed animal.  Slowly it is taken.  Then it is hugged tightly as one would hold a shield to protect themselves from attack.  A few more toys, crayons, coloring book.  The child eyes open wider, their head raises slightly.  At last the biggest item, a handmade quilt.  They take the quilt and put their face into it.  They hide from this world that had treated them so terribly.  It almost seems as though they were given the opportunity, the would stay there for and eternity, protected from all the pain they feel.


Suddenly and slowly, the child becomes more than the pain they feel.  Even if for a moment only they feel normal.  In that moment, if you pay attention you can almost make out the beginning of a light in that child’s eyes. There is an ember of hope.

Of the many times I have seen this happen it always strikes me as though a miracle had happen. 


I don’t mean to insinuate that the child doesn’t have hard times ahead, but in facing those they have a shield and safe area.  One bag of items.  It doesn’t seem like much but its enough to keep hope alive, even if just from moment to moment.  I hope you holiday season is filled with hope and love.  Remember to look for the miracles that happen all year long, not just during the season. 


Peace and Love to all of you.



Xander's Recipe of the Month

Holidays Ham Bone Soup



1 ham bone with some meat

1 small onion, finely chopped

1 (15 ounce) can whole peeled tomatoes with juice

1 (14 ounce) package frozen mixed vegetables, thawed

3 potatoes, peeled and diced

1 1/2 cups uncooked elbow macaroni

3/4 cup uncooked long grain rice

1 cup chopped cooked ham, or amount leftover

1 (10 ounce) can tomato sauce




1.   Place the ham bone into a large pot and fill with enough water to cover. Bring to a boil and cook for 15 minutes. Add the onion and tomatoes, then stir in the frozen mixed vegetables and potatoes. Simmer for about 20 minutes, then add the macaroni, rice, and chopped ham. Cover and simmer over medium-low heat for 1 1/2 hours. Any ham on the bone should come off easily. Stir in the tomato sauce and let cool for about 15 minutes before serving.



Thank you for Reading Good Food 4U

By Xander the Food Dude

Please send thoughts and comments to


In 2007, Sonya was diagnosed with Type II Diabetes; a generational curse that she had prayed to avoid, but didn’t worry about while she piled butter pecan ice cream on her German Chocolate Cake.    Only a few months into this diagnosis, she woke up one morning unable to walk and in excruciating pain in her left foot.  Doctors finally diagnosed an acute tendonitis, exacerbated by uncontrolled diabetes. 

That was the wake-up call, She had suffered for years with high cholesterol and sleep apnea; all associated with her weight,  it wasn’t until this happened (wheelchair bound for a month and on crutches following that) did she tell herself "I have to do something about my weight."  On April 17, 2008, Sonya had the gastric bypass medical weight loss procedure and it was the best decision that she made for herself.  In these upcoming writings, Sonya invites you to learn the ups and downs of gastric bypass: through the eyes of one who lives it every day.

Now Sharing her story Angie Bee  (Sonya's Sister) is sharing her Similar but entirely Unique Story with LargeInCharge Readers through Sonya's Column.
Angie Bee - I'm Starting my New Year... Now!
with Sonya Bennett & Angie Bee


I feel like I am SO in charge of my life now, Praise God!  I have lost more than 100 pounds since my February 28, 2011 gastric bypass surgery and several of my health issues have been resolved.  My asthma is under control.  The high blood pressure is normal.  The insulin-dependent type II diabetes is in remission and the sleep apnea has improved.  I survived Thanksgiving without overeating and I am really looking forward to Christmas!  What a wonderful year it has been! 


While chatting on the phone with a one of my recording artists, she shared a similar testimony about the goodness of God and an improvement in her health.  We both started the year in poor health and under the irregular leadership of a "Mentor".  Our lives weren't under our control; her life misdirected by an inept and greedy manager and my Spirit being crushed under a controlling and irresponsible business partner.  We emerged from these miserable associations knowing that our lives would depend on taking stronger control and now we rejoice in the blessings that are on the horizon for each of us.  "I'm starting my New Year right now, Angie" states Elder Porschia Steele, "and I see the glory of the Lord preparing to bless us for our obedience".


When I think about how challenging life has been for many of us this past year with lay-offs, illness and loss, it is a wonder that many of us have survived.  The upcoming election promises to bring better times for our nation, but I stand on the position that my life is in my hands and I need to remain in charge of it!  Yes, as a Christian I realize that my steps are ordered; but I would rather be ordered by Christ than to allow someone else to be in charge of my life.


Thanksgiving was a time of reflection and joy with family.  Christmas is a time of giving and getting.  What does the new year bring?  I ain't gonna wait to see!  I want to start living my new year right now!  I want to continue in ministry and outreach.  I want to rejoice as my health improves.  I want to expand my business and collaborate with other business owners.  Our syndicated radio show is growing and the TV shows are too!  I want to give advertisers more than they could have asked or thought they would receive and I want to watch the blessings of the Lord rain down on my head.


Be in charge of your life and dedicate your gifts to the improvement of your life and your community.  While attending End Time Warriors for Christ in Winter Garden, Florida a few weeks ago, Pastor Alexander Trapp informed the congregation that we are blessed to receive in order to share them with others.  We received gifts in order to be a blessing to another.  This puts us in CHARGE!  Pastor Trapp stated "If you aren't giving to others or blessing another then you will cease to receive additional blessings.  We receive blessings in order to BE a blessing!". 


Spend this month taking charge of your life and use this control to bless someone else.  A blessing doesn't need to be a gift or food donation or a cash donation.  Don't just help out another person because of how they may return the favor.  Do something for someone and be sure they DON'T know that it came from you! Bless someone in a way that makes them rejoice in what you have done and let's see if this action encourages them to do something for another.  Society calls it "Paying It Forward", but I like to call it "Stimulating the Cycle of Blessings".  The birth of Jesus is the reason for the Christmas Season, but Christ desires to see His gifts shared with others.  Let's be in charge of our lives and let's share our blessings with others.


BEE Blessed, family.  Have a very Merry Christmas and a safe New Year and if it is the Lord's will, I will see you again next month.


Angie BEE

Author, Magazine Publisher, Producer, Promoter &

The Host of The Hottest Home Hotspot WORLDWIDE

Syndicated Holy Hip Hop Radio Show



Thanks for reading

The Big GB - My Gastric Bypass Memoirs

Sonya's Links:

Sonya Bennett on Facebook

     Founded in 1969, NAAFA is a non-profit civil rights organization dedicated to improving the quality of life for fat people. NAAFA works to eliminate discrimination based on body size and provide fat people with the tools for self-empowerment through public education, advocacy, and member support.


     This Column is dedicated to the tremendous work NAAFA has been doing for over four decades.  LargeInCharge wishes to support NAAFA in spreading the word of its work, and give the public more information into issues we as plus sized people should be aware of.  The fight for equality for people of all sizes is one we support.


     This Column will include News Releases and Calls to Action from NAAFA Directors.


This Column has been Approved by


Spend Your Holiday Dollars with those Who Support Us!



As Christmas approaches, NAAFA has a way for you to avoid the craziness that so many of us experience while shopping every year!   Why face those unbelievably early morning hours and aggressive, maddening crowds?  Instead, why not sleep in and shop on-line?  And while you are at it, we encourage you to support those companies that support us all year long, year after year, the companies that provide products and services especially for our community.

In order to help with your shopping this year, we would like to direct you to a special page on the NAAFA website with links to dozens of businesses that specialize in products for people of size: 

Simply click on the category that interests you and the list will open. 

You’ll find links to clothing, jewelry, art, furniture, books, videos and more.  You are sure to find something for everyone on your list on these websites. 

NAAFA takes no responsibility for the sale of goods and services from these websites, and suggests that you shop with the same care as you would in any other marketplace.



Thanks for reading

From the Desk of NAAFA



Our WebGirl Lucia Roth, was born in New Orleans, Louisiana. Graduated with a B. A. degree in Communication from Southeastern Louisiana University and is considering going back for her Masters degree. Lucia a people person and is always willing to help out a friend in need. She enjoys music, movies, poetry, and good book on a rainy day. Lucia has several mottos about life.

This is one: Knowledge talks, wisdom listens.


I just wanted to re- introduce myself, since I just joined Large In Charge magazine last year. My name is Lulu, and I am a fashion writer for I am a fashion junkie:) I look forward to finding wonderful fashion find and product of the month for you. I also look forward to chatting with you all an reading some good fashion comments! Please let me know if you have a favorite.



The WebGirl Picks of the Month

Fashion Find Product of the Month


Fashion Find

Fashion Find Type: Fashion Bug

Sale Price: 30-40% off


End of summer… Burr!  Winter is vastly approaching and you know what that mean “Holiday Season” Ughhhhh! So to all my fashionista out there it’s time to hit the sale rack. Check out fashion bug Holiday stocking stuffers, gifts under $25, gifts under $15, and gift under $10. For you or love ones. 



Product of the Month

Recommended by: Lucia

Name of Product: Virgin Mobile

Type of Product: Cell Phones

Where Product can be found:

Description:   Virgin Mobile offers Prepaid Cell Phone Service and Pay as you Go with No Annual Contracts. Ringtones, Downloads, & Wireless Accessories for your Prepaid


Pat is a forty something woman living in Southern Ontario, Canada. She has a varied past and has worked teaching literacy and English as a second language to adults, as an environmental science technician and in the health and safety field. Currently she works in marketing.

Pat fiercely believes in human rights for all and has volunteered for organizations that raise funds and develop and implement programs to help impoverished people and educate women in third world countries. Although relatively new to the size acceptance movement, Pat believes with all her heart that people of size deserve equal treatment and respect.
In her spare time she likes to read fiction, go to bashes and spend time with friends.


with Pat Llewellyn


My goal at the beginning of this year was to try and live my life with more reckless abandon. The year started out well, I was worrying less; I was happier and had a positive outlook.  Lately I’ve been feeling down and been having trouble coping. It’s like I’ve been going from one crisis to the next and haven’t been able to breathe. 


I have been having issues at work with my boss, I have had my 16 year old niece live with me on and off this year, someone close to me recently tried to end their life, I’m dealing with my own health issues and my father has cancer. We have known about his cancer for a few years, but this year I have seen his health deteriorate faster than ever. It breaks my heart to see this man who has always been healthy and strong, become ill and frail. All of these stresses are taking their toll on me


I’ve been very neglectful of things in my life, including this column. I just get home from work most days and I’m exhausted. All I want to do is go to bed. I don’t want to eat; I’m fat and love food, so that is telling you something. I just want to ignore the world and pretend that it doesn’t exist. I’m crying a lot. In fact I’m fighting back the tears as I write this. I’ve gotten into this negative spiral of thinking.


I need to make some changes in my life. I need to acknowledge the good things in my life. I have some amazing friends, a great editor (yes, I’m sucking up to Raqui), my niece is a joy and I make a comfortable living. My happiness needs to come from within, I know this. Sometimes it’s just hard to find it.


Today, I recommit to living a life of reckless abandon. Wish me luck.



Pat (A.K.A. Lulu)


     Ms Suga is a plus size woman hailing from Sunny South Florida. She is a 24 year old recent recipient of a Bachelor in Arts degree in Communication Studies. Being plus size for the majority of her life she has overcome many obstacles to finally come to the point where she is fully content with herself and her life. This self love has also allowed Ms Suga the privilege of sharing her love with those around her. She is very passionate about life and loves to help others.

     Ms Suga likes to see herself as the one everyone can go to for positive, inspirational and truthful words of advice and/or support. She is the Beautiful Inspirational Girl that is blessed, intellectual, trustworthy, caring and hardworking.

     Ms Suga has had a passion for writing since she was a little girl when she used to think of short stories about what her life would be like as she got older. This is Ms Suga’s first opportunity for her thoughts to be public for the world to see. Excited about this column Ms Suga is also very optimistic of her future in writing and promoting self love and acceptance in the plus size community.


U must make a CHOICE to take a CHANCE or life will never CHANGE!

with Ms Suga



            Pretty self-explanatory huh? Maybe… Maybe Not. I once read somewhere that you can't make the same mistake twice because the second time it's not a mistake it's a choice. The end of the year is swiftly approaching and it's almost time for a New Year and those infamous New Year's resolutions. So this year while you are plotting and planning the diet you won't continue past February and the budget that won't survive the first sale of the New Year think about the three C's.


            Instead of the typical "I'm going to lose 20 pounds by the summer" resolution, you should make the CHOICE to take a CHANCE on eating healthier little by little. This CHOICE could lead you in the right direction to making the CHANGE in your life and your health you want. Give yourself a CHANCE to make a life CHANGE that will be more beneficial and allows more opportunities for CHOICES. Better yet take a CHANCE on eating in and attempting to cook more home cooked meals? That could help you save money as well as develop some social skills within your household. Cook dinner with the spouse and/or kids. Come up with dinner themes such as "Taco Tuesday" or "Soup and Sandwich Saturday." If you live alone invite some friends over for pot luck and movie night. You will immediately notice a difference in how you feel and realize how easy and fun it could be to make a life CHANGE.


            Instead of the "I'm going to save up and finally go on that cruise" promise to yourself why not make a CHOICE to save your pocket change and use that to start saving. Not just saving up for a cruise but saving up for a rainy day or an unexpected bill. Yes it may seem small now, but the more those coins add up the closer you are to your goal.

Take a CHANCE on clipping coupons and even cutting back on your regular spending. Do you really need that new Coach purse?


            This could teach you a life CHANGE instead of just fulfilling your temporary goal. I inspire you to get creative! Step out of your box and make the CHOICE to finally take a CHANCE and you will be amazed in what CHANGE you will see.


 Happy Holidays



Ms. Suga




Gabriela Falarz lives in Toronto, Canada. She has been up and down the scale for most of her life (mostly up), and is proud to say that she loves herself no matter what her size, although it has definitely been an evolution.


She blogs about size acceptance in her blog, Celebreight Yourself (  Gabriela discovered Large in Charge Radio about a year ago and has been hooked ever since. She is thrilled to be writing for Large in Charge and to be part of an organization that helps all large people realize how beautiful, special, and amazing they are.


Ask Yourself This Question

with Gabriela Falarz


Ask Yourself This Question 

What is it about you that makes you, YOU?


Does your weight have anything to do with it?


This question was posed to me recently, and it really made me think. I had to really sit there and think about what makes me the person I am. I can’t narrow it down to any one thing, but this is what I know for sure.


I’m a dreamer. I have always had a huge imagination, and sometimes, my imagination gets the better of me. Sometimes I miscalculate things. Sometimes I overestimate myself. More often, I underestimate myself. But whatever happens, I move along. I take note of the outcome of a situation, and file it away for future reference. If I have failed, I know I can always try again. If I succeed, I celebrate quietly, inside myself. I don’t need to brag. I know that my own recognition of my success is what matters the most.


I’m a fighter. Not in an aggressive, violent way. In a psychological, verbal way. I will not allow anyone to demean me, and I don’t take kindly to seeing it done to anyone else, either. If I get treated badly, my blood boils. It festers inside me and I know I have to release it or I will explode. So I write about it, and I write about the wrongs I see done to other people. I will do this until I die. 


I’m a lover. I love making love and making my partner feel good. I love making other people happy and seeing them smile. I love taking care of the people I love. I love animals, especially kitty cats. I love beautiful places, like my favorite park and the beach, because they remind me of the beauty of the world we live in. I love art because it reminds me of the beauty we all have within us, just waiting to be expressed. I love music because it sets my soul on fire. I love films and books because they let me know what it’s like to be someone else for a little while.


I’m a joker. I’ve always had a keen sense of the absurd and I love to laugh. I’m usually always able to see the funny side of things, and I’m very good at making other people laugh. (I have to acknowledge my older brother for some of this, as growing up with him was the perfect training ground, a constant barrage of dark comedy. Thanks, Glenn!)


Does my being a plus-sized woman have anything to do with this? Having a good sense of humor definitely helps, and I’m sure I developed it at least partly as a defense mechanism.


But my fat has very little to do with who I really am, and I’ll be willing to bet it doesn’t have all that much to do with who you really are either. We put so much importance on the way we look, and not nearly enough on who we really are.




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