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LargeInCharge Magazine -  Nine Years and Counting!

 Issue#113 - August 2013

Welcome to LargeInCharge Magazine

In this Issue of L.I.C.

 

 

Raqui-ism

Words of Wisdom from the Heart & Mind of Raqui

 

The Big GB Getting my Life Back after Gastric Bypass  Angie Bee

 

From the Desk of NAAFA

National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance

 

FOoDiE in You ~ Lucia Roth

 

The B.I.G. Beautiful Inspirational Girl  - Ms Suga

 

Dating Survival for Today's Woman

Kathy Edmondson

 

The Observer - Jness

 

Curvy Styles - Amy Lucas

 

The Skinny on Big Love - Jay Hansen

 

Thinking Big - David Edmondson

 

LargeInChargeDating - Dating for the Large People who are going to be in Charge of their Love Lives!

 

LargeInCharge Friends - The Place for Big People to make Friends and maybe MUCH MORE!

 

Chubby Women
Challenges notions
of Traditional Beauty

 

Chinese sculptures turning heads in Australia

Internet Source:

 

Watch above News report.

With Asian art becoming increasingly prominent in Australia, one of China's most accomplished sculptors has brought his latest work to the country.

 Xu Hongfei says his art, "Chubby Women", challenges the traditional notions of beauty.

 So who is Xu Hongfei?

Biography:

Born in 1963, Xu Hongfei studied sculpture at the Guangzhou Academy of Fine Arts and continues to be a major influence on young Chinese artists through his role as President of the Guangzhou Academy of Sculpture.

He has been involved in numerous public sculpture projects in different parts of China since the 1990s. Internationally he has held exhibitions in France, Hong Kong and Thailand.



In 2008, the Paris Eighth District Government invited Xu to hold a solo exhibition in the French capital. While later that same year the International Olympic Committee selected him as the only sculptor representing China at the “Olympic Sport & Art Exhibition”. His work “A Merry Victory” is on display at IOC Headquarters in Lausanne, Switzerland.



Much of the inspiration for Xu Hongfei’s contemporary work is drawn from his friendship with Chinese master Huang Yongyu, who has produced numerous acclaimed works in calligraphy, oil painting, watercolour, ink painting and woodcuts. Huang’s works are currently hung at the Art Gallery of New South Wales and the Queensland Art Gallery | Gallery of Modern Art.



In the late 1990s Xu Hongfei and Huang Yongyu discussed a new direction for his art, the result was his acclaimed “Chubby Women” series – a collection that has now grown to over 100 pieces.



In this series, Xu searches for beauty from daily life and found liberty and enchantment in portraying Chubby Women. He looks for a unique and creative perspective in an all natural way. Xu is certain about the beauty in them and pays a lot of respect to them, respect to the human body with a philosophical stance. He considers that each person has the right to enjoy one’s own body and be confident and contented about it.



Xu Hongfei believes “art should be fun and amusing” and has combined traditional and contemporary spirit of art in this series. His Chubby Women are independent and live their lives with both purpose and enjoyment. His meticulous use of white marbles, precious wood and bronze in portraying these figures have left viewers and art pursuers with new dimension to beauty in a revitalizing way.

See more of Xu Hongfei’s work and learn about him at:

Facebook: Hongfei Xu Arts  - https://www.facebook.com/XuhongfeiArts

Website:   http://xuhongfei.artron.net/main.php?aid=A0260526

Biography taken from HongfeiXu Arts facebook page

 

 
 

Thank you for Reading The LargeInCharge Feature

 

Cover Model of the Month!
Florida's own

Chica Plush

 

Want to be a LargeInCharge Cover Model? Download the Application for 2013 - HERE

COVER MODEL INTERVIEW

 

LargeInCharge.com: What is your name?

·         Janelle but I’m well-known as Chica Plush online (i.e. Facebook, Twitter, Tagged, etc.)

LargeInCharge.com: Where are you from and what is your current Location?  

·         Originally, I’m from Brooklyn, NY but moved to the Tampa Bay Area in Florida when I was 11 years old; so, I’m a native Floridian. ;-)

LargeInCharge.com: Can you give us some information about yourself (Age, Height, Size, Nationality, Marital Status, Children, etc.)? 

·         September 17, 1977 | Age 35 | Virgo

·         Height  is 5’ 7” without heels

·         Size ranges from 20-22

·         Nationality is Argentinean, Puerto Rican and a small percentage of Italian

·         In a relationship

·         No children, however, I have to Pugs so they count as my kids ;-)

LargeInCharge.com: Were you a big child, or did you gain weight later in life?

·       When I was young, I was always the “biggest” among my cousins and friends. When I look back at my pictures, I realized I wasn’t that fat as how everyone perceived me to be. Now, I wish I was that “fat” back then. LOL I’m much bigger now than when I was a teenager or in my twenties.

LargeInCharge.com: (If you were a big child) how did you feel growing up as a large child?

·         Since everyone made me feel as if I was a big child, I felt awkward in crowds or with my skinny cousins. I always admired their clothes and how nice they looked; meanwhile, I was wearing oversized shirts to cover my butt and tried to avoid wearing shorts as much as I can to prevent showing my legs.

LargeInCharge.com: (If you gained weight later in life) what caused you to gain weight and how did you feel about it?

·         My weight gain was due to convenience of fast food. I very often stay up late at night and have a difficult time in the morning to get up on time. So, I would daily visit McDonald’s for breakfast or lunch and then I work late, so again, I order fast food for dinner or get Chinese take-out. Since I eat so late at night, I don’t move around a lot to burn some of it off. Instead, I lay down in bed or on my couch which is not good at all!

LargeInCharge.com: What made you decide to enter the LargeInCharge model search?

 

·         This model search represents size-acceptance which I do my best in portraying when I post positive messages online. I also co-manage BBW & BHM Club Plush in Tampa, FL and it always feels good when my patrons tell me that they feel welcomed, accepted and how there’s no judgment due to their weight size. They always have a good time and make new friends. My sister & manager, Camille (aka Latin Breeze) and I do our best to provide an environment where they can be themselves. If I was on the cover, it would enhance my ability to show everyone in the community that no matter your size, you can be a part of anything when you strive for it! I don’t want anyone to feel that their weight should hold them back in doing whatever their heart desires.

LargeInCharge.com: Did you find it a hard journey to be accepted for your size, and do you find acceptance among your family and friends?

·         Yes, it’s a hard journey to be accepted of my size. Outside of the plus-size community, I tend to feel awkward among skinny people when I go to a store, restaurant, or clubs. But then I realize I don’t care what these people think of my size so I shake it off, put my chin up, and walk in with confidence. My friends are true and they accept me as I am. However, there is judgment with my family that me and my sister face every-so-often, but we encourage each other and we keep it moving!

LargeInCharge.com: What would you say inspires you most in life?

·        Honestly, what inspires me are the positive messages/posts and pictures I see of plus-size women looking all sorts of fabulous! Just because you’re big doesn’t mean you can’t wear just as beautiful clothes, flattering outfits, have nice hair styles and makeup done.

LargeInCharge.com: What is your primary occupation, and how did you get into this line of work?

·         For over 10 years, I worked in the magazine publishing industry. I loved working for magazines such as the duPont Registry of Fine Automobiles, Makes & Models Magazine and South Tampa Magazine. I would handle the advertisements for each publication, circulation, press checks, dealt the printers & newsstands, etc. But the instant access to news and articles on the internet hurt sales in the (paper) publishing industry, so therefore, I was laid off. Since then, I’ve been working for a company that hosts conferences and trade shows on aboveground & underground storage tanks nationwide. I handle their marketing and get to do some traveling. When I travel to different states, I take the opportunity to have a BBW meet up somewhere while I’m visiting. ;-)

LargeInCharge.com: Do you find acceptance in the work force?

·         At my office, my size really isn’t an issue. However, when I do my travels to the conference and trade shows, it’s a male dominate industry and I get looked at a lot as I walk by the exhibit booths and I can see that they’re checking me out making me feel like they’re thinking “she’s big or look how big her butt/legs are, etc.” I do ignore those looks and keep a smile on my face. I always have a professional demeanor and I approach them no differently than anyone else. I remain friendly and cordial with everyone regardless if I feel they are judging me according to my size.

LargeInCharge.com: What changes do you believe should take place for Large People in the work force?

·         Changes in the workplace ultimately results in the person. People sometimes feed on the vibe you give off. If your demeanor, confidence, and professional approach are positive and upbeat, they will no longer see your size and see you as a person. If you’re over weight, don’t put yourself down or criticize yourself in front of others. They feed on that negativity too and will say the same about you. Your attitude in the workforce or anywhere for that matter will change the outlook of how people see/treat you!

LargeInCharge.com: What do you think about the fashion industry for big sized clothing?

·         The changes in the fashion industry for big sized clothing are fantastic!! I see a lot of pictures of runways, pageants, and clothing lines all the time and I love the style and use of colors. Most of the clothes are so flattering for women that have curves, big thighs or a belly. I’m constantly seeing improvements in this industry and I can’t wait till it becomes completely main stream.

LargeInCharge.com: What do you wish to see change with the fashion industry?

 

·         So far, I’ve seen everything from hats, tops, bottoms, swim suits, casual wear, nightgowns, club attire, and shoes for plus-size women! The change I would like to see is having more of these items in an actual store than online and runways. Also, I understand that some clothing lines price their clothes high due to demand, but I would like to see more reasonable price clothes too.

LargeInCharge.com: Tell us some of the places you buy your clothing from.  Do you have any beauty tips.

 

·         Most of the clothes I buy from are DOTS and Ross. Both stores are hit or miss but they’re reasonably priced, trendy, and flattering plus they’re convenient to where I live and work.

·         As for beauty tips, wear low cut or v-neck tops/dresses. Round neck tops are not always flattering especially if you have broad shoulders like I do. As a personal preference, try to always wear mascara or false eyelashes. I think it’s such a great feminine look that instantly brings out your eyes which are most men’s favorite feature on a woman. ;-)

LargeInCharge.com:  How do you prepare for a Photo shoot?  What should aspiring models be prepared for?

·        Most of my pictures are taken from my iPhone. However, I’ve done two photo shoots in my life. For those two occasions, I washed my hair two days before the photo shoot because my hair always looks best on the second day and it’s easier to manage. Apply extra foundation and eye shadow so it shows better in the pictures. Practice your angles in the mirror and find what looks best before the photo shoot. Practice on your happy smiley face, serious look, slightly pucker your lips, and always stick out your chin to show the jaw line of your face. For your eyes, take pics of yourself looking away from the camera, look up, look down, look to the side, and practice those looks with different facial expressions too.  Play around with it and have fun.

LargeInCharge.com: Look at Size acceptance five years ago... look at size acceptance now.  What changes do you see?

·         Five years ago, I wasn’t fully involved in the BBW community like my sister was. She worked as a door girl for the owner, Chris Plush, at the time and she introduced it to me. Before that, I had no clue about size acceptance. I just dealt with the fact with I’m a plus size woman and felt the need to constantly get on a diet to fit in. After being involved with the BBW community, I see all the changes that evolved and what a great support system we have and to know that your size is love and admired by many! It was a complete 180 from five years ago and I’m so happy to be a part of it! I strive to find others that were like me and educate them that their size is nothing to be ashamed about rather to embrace it and feel great & confident in the size you’re in.

LargeInCharge.com: Tell us about your goals as far as modeling and other interests.

·         My goal is to continue growing BBW & BHM Club Plush and expand somehow. Extend my marketing efforts to reach more people who are heavy weight and let them know about the plus size community. So if they’re feeling down about themselves, I want to let them know about the great support system we have and encourage them to go out more often. Not necessarily only to Club Plush, but anywhere they want to and not let their weight hinder them in going places and trying new things to keep the momentum going! In the future, my sister and I intend in doing more activities such as a local BBW fashion show, speed dating, clothes swap, workout programs, pool/beach parties, picnics, etc.

LargeInCharge.com:  Have you entered or won any Contests, Pageants or Awards?  What was the experience like?

·         No, I haven’t …. Yet!

LargeInCharge.com: Is there a person in your life that makes you keep going?

·         There’s not one person per se rather it’s a group of people: My sister, niece, boyfriend plus my Club Plush team and patrons keep me going. They instill in me that I’m beautiful regardless of my size and the support & love I get from them is overwhelming. Therefore, I pass on the love to others and encourage/reassure them that their size is of beauty and to build on confidence.

LargeInCharge.com: Which plus size figure do you most admire?

·         The plus size figure I admire is Fluvia Lacerda and Rosie Mercado. They are so beautiful and the styles of clothes they model are feminine and gorgeous! They represent curves and plus size very well.

LargeInCharge.com: Describe yourself with one word.

·         Motivated

 


 

Thanks for reading about our

Cover Model of the Month

 

 

     Raqui the Owner and Founder of LargeInCharge.com, Raqui's  "Tell it like it is" style of writing has brought thousands to her blogs and millions to LargeInCharge.com.  There is so much behind the woman who has brought this magazine into existence.  Being Internationally known as a wrestler/squasher lead the way to modeling for companies and being featured in magazines and documentaries from all over the world.  She has made a career out of her size and personality. Born and Raised in the Bronx NYC. This city girl is taking the world by storm.

 

     For almost a decade Raqui officially moved into Size Acceptance and Empowerment.  With the creation of LargeInCharge she took what she said to individuals to a higher level and made it public to the internet world. She is a woman who doesn't let things get to her.  Knock her down for the moment but she will rise up stronger and better.  Being a speaker on behalf of many subjects and counseling Plus Sized people online her grace and style has made people love her.  Raqui continues to set an example of a powerful woman who will bend the world to fit her, her way.

 

     Raqui's appearances include, Uk Television, German TV, Japan, Europe, Sweden and the Spanish circuit.  Her many magazines appearances have been world wide.  She has hit American Television in 2006 with Good Morning American and since has appeared on The Cristina Show,  The Maury Show and The Tyra Banks Show.

To view her Online portfolio visit www.Raqui.com

Raqui's Blog titled Raqui-ism "Soulfully Speaking! - http://raqui-ism.blogspot.com/

go to www.Raqui.com Portfolio Section

Raqui-ism - Worthy Charities 2013

Written By: Raqui

 

 

 

 

 This year LargeInCharge has begun its 9th year moving toward our 10th. I challenged myself this year by starting my own little quest toward learning, giving, and expanding my own mind, by donating to a new charity every month.  I hope that you all will enjoy learning about these new charities with me.  

 

I began to understand that most of us only donate to a charity if we have an emotional connection to the charity itself or someone who is trying to raise money for a cause.   One day when I happened to dismiss a charity that was asking for donations, I realized I dont want to be that person.  I want to give because the cause is worthy and I can.  Not only because of an emotional connection.   So join me in learning about new causes and charities this year.  I will post a new one to my column every month.

 

CHARITY OF THE MONTH:  END 7 - dieases across the World

 

Being raised in the US, I never heard of the many diseases that plague other countries who do not have treatment available to the poor, the same medical care I have received growing up.  I remember my father and mother speaking about how they or others have gotten worms from fruit as children in Puerto Rico.

 

Treatments from parents, grandparents were spoken about, and my father told me about when he came to the US as a child.  Before coming to the US, he received treatment for worms in his body.  He was very skinny but his belly was like a balloon! He was basically starving all the time because the worms were eating everything my father took into his body. He like many children in Puerto Rico ate fruit off the ground that had fallen from trees.  He recounted to me many times as I grew up how he remembered getting the medication and how so many worms came out of his body they filled a bucket.  Yes my father could have died from the amount of worms that had infested his body.

That is my total knowledge of such diseases and for some reason I never was educated about such things. All I was told growing up is that you receive immunizations, you don’t eat things from the ground, and you always wash your hands so you won’t get sick.

 

I consider myself fairly educated and quite resourceful about finding information.  I didn’t completely connect or have knowledge about these sickness.  I am hurt and dismayed that I didn’t have a full understanding these issues that millions of people face across the world.  Medical conditions that are so harmful yet easy to prevent.

Well Today I am joining in the fight to End 7 disease’s buy 2020!  I hope you will check out the below information and donate as well.

Raqui

 

What is End 7? – taken from the End 7 Website and YouTube page

 

Here's the background: Nearly 1 in 6 people around the world, including 500 million children, suffer from seven NTDs: Elephantiasis, Roundworm, Hookworm, Whipworm, Trachoma, River Blindness and Snail Fever.

What's different about this story, though, is the ending. The great news is that all it takes to treat these seven diseases is a packet of pills, costing 50 cents. With the backing of some major players, including the World Health Organization and the Bill & Melinda Gates Foundation, we can actually eliminate these diseases by 2020.

END7 aims to raise the public awareness and funding required to cover the cost of distributing medicine and setting up treatment programs for NTDs. A big problem is that NTDs affect neglected communities -- the world's poorest people. So END7 is about providing them with a voice to help address a big problem.

 

 

 

The Mission

We're on a mission. And it's a big one, to end the suffering, of over half a billion children by 2020. The solution is surprisingly simple.

Your donation, however small, can make a huge difference.  We’ve done the math and for about 50 cents we can treat and protect one child against all seven diseases for a year.  So with $5 you can treat 10 children and with $10 you can treat 20 children ... you get the idea.

More importantly, 100 percent of donations given to END7 will go straight to NTD treatment programs in Asia, Africa and Latin America and the Caribbean, the three regions with the largest NTD burdens.

Your donations will help us deliver much-needed medicines and will help communities set up treatment programs that they can manage themselves.

 

Supporters

We asked celebrities including Emily Blunt, Eddie Redmayne and Priyanka Chopra to watch a powerful new video. See how they reacted to people suffering from neglected tropical diseases (NTDs)...Can you make it through to the end?

Most people have never heard of these seven diseases, but as you'll see on the video, NTDs can be horrific and are a major reason why poor communities stay trapped in poverty. It costs just 50 cents to treat and protect one person for an entire year.

Emily Blunt ("Salmon Fishing in the Yemen," "Devil Wears Prada"); Eddie Redmayne ("Les Miserables," "My Week with Marilyn"); Tom Felton ("Harry Potter" series); Yvonne Chaka Chaka (South African pop star); Tom Hollander ("Pirates of the Caribbean," "Pride and Prejudice"); and Priyanka Chopra (leading Bollywood actress and international recording artist) are featured in the video and are END7 supporters.

This won't be easy. To end these diseases by 2020 we need to raise money from governments and the public to transport the pills to those in need, and set up treatment programs that communities can run themselves. While the diseases have been around for centuries, the global effort to eliminate them is brand new.

 

Donate Now

Please donate at http://www.end7.org/ENDthis

Like END7 on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/EndSeven
Follow END7 on Twitter: https://twitter.com/END_7

Visit http://www.end7.org to join the fight.

 

END7 is a grassroots campaign managed by the Global Network for Neglected Tropical Diseases, an initiative of the Sabin Vaccine Institute, to raise the awareness, funds and political will necessary to eliminate the seven most common NTDs by 2020.  The Sabin Vaccine Institute has received Charity Navigator's highest four-star rating consecutively since 2008. 


 

LargeInCharge Radio - Weekly Radio show discussing Plus Sized Issues.  Friday's 9-11 pm EST - Call in & Chat in our Chat Room.

 

Thank you for Reading Raqui-ism

Please send thoughts and comments to

articles@largeincharge.com

 
 

   

Angie BEE grew-up a standard-sized young woman, educated in communications, promotions and planning.  She became a wife, mother and ministry support member while building businesses and her faith.

Through stress, age and a poor diet and while suffering from major depression and attempted suicide, Angie BEE's weight climbed from 180 pounds to 360 pounds.  She was diagnosed with high blood pressure, diabetes, obstructive sleep apnea, an overactive bladder and poor leg circulation.  At the age of 40 an anxiety attack and the decline in her mental health forced her to stop work and look at improving her declining health.  It was during this time that Angie BEE became inspired by her younger sister Sonya Bennett during her process towards Gastric Bypass Surgery.  Sonya launched this column and will return occasionally to contribute to it, but now that she is three years-post surgery... her life is focused on something new!

Now, celebrating her first year of a new life since having the procedure herself, Angie BEE is healthier than she has been in over a decade.  Losing the first 100 pounds was just the bonus!  She is now diabetes-free.  She has normal blood pressure.  The circulation in her legs is normal.  She sleeps without a c-pap machine and more!  The joy that she feels is documented each day in her syndicated radio show, a brand new weekly  TV show documentary and each month in this article.  The Big GB stands for The BIG Gastric Bypass and it also stands for "Getting (my life) Back".  This article reflects how Angie BEE's life has improved... by the grace of God and as the result of having Gastric Bypass surgery on Feb 28, 2011.  This is now her life!

 

I'm Getting Married!

with Angie Bee

Can you believe it?  On August 9th I will marry a man that has become my best friend.  I will marry a man that prays with me and works with me and plays by my side.  This man doesn't see a woman that "had gastric bypass surgery".  He doesn't see a woman that weighed 386 at her heaviest weight.  He doesn't see the former diabetic or the woman affected by sleep apnea and high blood pressure; all he sees is me!  All he sees is a happy, healthy evangelist that uses her gifts and talents to spread the gospel of Jesus Christ and all he sees is my joy.  I'm getting married and I couldn't wait to share it with each of you!

 

Getting my life back after gastric bypass has always been the theme of this article.  I try to share with you how my life has changed and improved while I am losing weight.  In May I was diagnosed with a tumor that was affecting my health.  I became anemic and the pain was horrible.  The doctors finally prescribed something that made the pain tolerable and the medical treatments for the tumor is working!  Throughout the month of May and June I continued to produce segments for my syndicated radio show and make concert appearances with The TOUR!  In June the TOUR performed at the Daytona Beach Juneteenth Family Festival and although I was in pain and miserable, the Lord got me through it with a smile on my face!  Just having my fiancé by my side made it all that much sweeter.  Thank you Lord!

 

In July the TOUR took a break and I started shooting episodes of a new talk show that will debut in September.  The show will be called "Angie BEE Presents" and you will see highlights of concerts, speaking engagements, book signings and even interviews that I do with business owners and ministry leaders.  Some episodes of the show will be featured here in this magazine during the upcoming months, but needless to say I was REALLY BUSY during the month of July.  My Lord was leading me every step of the way and my fiancé was with me too just smiling with support and love.  Towards the end of the month he took me on a vacation to his family reunion and we even dressed up for the 70's Party!  OH WEE!!  I had SUCH a great time at the Jenkins Family Reunion!

Once the reunion was over and we started looking at our upcoming schedule... setting a date for our marriage was really looking bleak!  The TOUR is doing a Back To School Concert event in August plus we travel to Detroit to meet my family...I have a book signing coming up at the Bethune Cookman University book store in September and a speaking engagement later that month...  October bookings are coming in and then there are the holidays... when can we find time to share our vows?

 

Sometimes when you are getting your life back after a life-altering experience, you have to learn to adjust schedules and plans and make accommodations.  For example, after my knee was broken in a car accident years ago I had to get my life back through physical therapy and surgeries while continuing to raise my children.  I just had to use the time I had and make it work!  Later on when I was suicidal with major depression, I had to go through mental therapy and medication while getting my life back.  Life still moved on for my family and I just had to learn to compromise and make accommodations. Now, my fiancé is a singer with concert engagements and I am an evangelist with engagements, we had to make adjustments to our schedules!  Every weekend that we have been engaged has been BOOKED and trying to find time for a ceremony was tough! 

 

Finally we talked and prayed and applied for a license and found some BEAUTIFUL rings and now that this is all finished we decided to get married before leaving town for an event.  The day before our Moms-n-Ministry Workshop in Ocala Florida, Friday, August 9th at 1:00 pm we plan to be married!  I am not stressing about how I will look in my dress, I ain't trying to get my tummy tuck before I walk down the aisle... It doesn't matter that we have an event that weekend.  God said that it shall be so and I am OK with that alone!  I am simply dedicating my life to be by his side while we live our lives together and nothing else matters!

During Easter I took my fiancé to meet my daughter.  Later that month my fiancé accompanied me as I was the MC of the Women In Red Ministry event.  The pictures that we took with me in my red gown are STILL favorite pictures on Facebook :)

We took pictures together at his family reunion 70's party and next week I am sure there will be more pictures while we exchange vows.  Next month you will see them and I will post more event flyers and continue to let you see how God has blessed me with this new life of health and healing and weight loss. 

Gastric Bypass saved my life from the downward spiral of declining health but I got my life back through obedience and service.  Now, my life is evolving to include someone supportive and I am more receptive to his love and support because I have healed!  My body has healed.  My mind is stronger and I have forgiven myself for many past decisions. 

Start loving yourself and forgive yourself and watch how your life then becomes your own....with your now IN CHARGE OF YOUR LIFE!

 

 

 

 

Angie BEE

www.daqueenbee.com

Author, Magazine Publisher, Producer, Promoter &

The Host of The Hottest Home Hotspot WORLDWIDE

Syndicated Holy Hip Hop Radio Show

Last Week I wanted to Die!

NOW AVAILABLE FOR PURCHASE!


 

   
 

Thanks for reading

The Big GB - Getting My Life back after Gastric Bypass

with Angie Bee


     Founded in 1969, NAAFA is a non-profit civil rights organization dedicated to improving the quality of life for fat people. NAAFA works to eliminate discrimination based on body size and provide fat people with the tools for self-empowerment through public education, advocacy, and member support.

 

     This Column is dedicated to the tremendous work NAAFA has been doing for over four decades.  LargeInCharge wishes to support NAAFA in spreading the word of its work, and give the public more information into issues we as plus sized people should be aware of.  The fight for equality for people of all sizes is one we support.

    

     This Column will include News Releases and Calls to Action from NAAFA Directors.

 

This Column has been Approved by NAAFA.org

 

AMA Rules Against Advisors: Fat Now a Disease!

from: NAAFA.org

Against the recommendation of their scientific advisors, the AMA declares obesity a disease.  Many believe this will further damage the already fragile relationship between physician and fat patient.

Patients of high body weight are one of the groups of people who are least inclined to seek medical attention because of the discrimination they face.   

 

Physician’s weight bias, already a major problem, is now moving beyond just stigmatization to clear dislike and negativity toward the overweight, (Brochu P., Esses V., [2009]).    Couple this with the fact that physicians have received insufficient or no training to address or examine fat patients and are frustrated with the lack of resources available to them (Amy NK, et al [2006]), setting the stage for a powder keg of discrimination, the likes of which we have never seen before.

 

Into this environment of bias and discrimination, the American Medical Association (AMA) declares that obesity is a disease.   "The AMA just put its official stamp of approval on the widespread weight bias of physicians.” stated NAAFA Advisory Board Member Dr. Deb Burgard.  “This act furthers the ‘War on the Obese.’ Economic greed and weight stigma have trumped science and the advice of the AMA's own expert committee, and it is a sad day for the relationship between doctors and their higher-weight patients…People are losing confidence that their doctors have their best interests at heart…This decision represents a clear victory of economic interests over science.”

 

Key points against AMA Ruling:

AMA turned away from science and the recommendations of its own scientific advisors

AMA cited economic motives in colluding with corporate interests

AMA failed to reach this decision with input of the relevant community of higher-weight people

 

NAAFA votes:

NO CONFIDENCE in the AMA

 

NAAFA demands:

A reversal of this designation and an immediate roundtable discussion that includes higher-weight people from every community.

 

 In response to the AMA decision, fat activists have started the #IAmNotADisease hashtag on Twitter.  Author and fat activist Marilyn Wann started a Change.org petition, which is already getting strong support. NAAFA encourages everyone who supports Equality At Every Size to sign and share the petition with others:  https://www.change.org/petitions/american-medical-association-stop-defining-obesity-sic-as-a-disease

 

 

Founded in 1969, NAAFA is a non-profit human rights organization dedicated to improving the quality of life for fat people. NAAFA works to eliminate discrimination based on body size and provide fat people with the tools for self-empowerment through public education, advocacy, and member support.

 

 
 
 

 

Thanks for reading

From the Desk of NAAFA

Link

www.NAAFA.org

    

Some of you make know me as web girl/Lulu from Fashion Find. Well… I’ve move on to another one of my favorite’s pastime which is cooking. To get you all up to date on what’s going on. I’m currently pursuing a graduate degree at Ashford University I have a B.A. degree in Organizational Communication from Southeastern Louisiana University.

 

I am most passionate about cooking. I believe with cooking you can always grow… I fried my first egg when I was 2 and baked my first cake at 5. Cooking is an easy and dynamic experience if you have a passion for a good tasting meal.

 

Motto: Cook with your heart not with your head.

 

If you have a favorite dish you would like to share please forward with recipe and photo to

Web_girl1999@yahoo.com

 

 

 
Happiness Kitchen
with Lucia Roth
 

 Welcome to August! Which is the middle and the hottest  summer of the month and the best way to beat the heat  is to have a festive picnic. Have you ever wonder where the term picnic came from? Let’s look at the history of the word….

History of the Picnic:

Food historians tell us picnics evolved from the elaborate traditions of moveable outdoor feasts enjoyed by the wealthy. Medieval hunting feasts, Renaissance-era country banquets, and Victorian garden parties lay the foundation for today's leisurely repast. Picnics, as we Americans know them today, date to the middle of the 19th century. Although the "grand picnic" is generally considered a European concept, culinary evidence confirms people from other parts of the world engage in similar practices.

So now we know the history of the picnic. What’s the best dish that  can go on that  picnic table which is easy and take no time to prepare.  Mmmm...   how about Avocado and Ham Sandwiches!

 

 

 

Avocado and Ham Sandwiches

 

Ingredients:

         2 loaf(s) (about 18 inches each) ficelle

         1/4 cup(s) butter, softened

         2 tablespoon(s) Dijon mustard

         1/8 teaspoon(s) coarse black pepper

         3/4 pound(s) Virginia ham, sliced

         3 large avocados, peeled and sliced

Directions:

1.       Cut each ficelle loaf into 3 equal pieces, and split each horizontally along one side, leaving the other side intact. Open the pieces so they lie flat.

2.       Stir the butter, mustard, and pepper together until smooth, and spread on both sides of the bread. Layer with the ham and avocado, and sprinkle with the sea salt.

3.       Wrap the sandwiches with parchment, and tie with a string to secure. Keep chilled and serve within 3 hours.

Note: Ficelle is a thin, chewy baguette loaf. Substitute one standard baguette for 2 ficelles: Just cut the heels off the ends and make each sandwich a little bit shorter.

Note:  You can always double your recipe to hide some for yourself…. Wink!

Bon Appetite!

 

 
   

     Ms Suga is a plus size woman hailing from Sunny South Florida. She is a 24 year old recent recipient of a Bachelor in Arts degree in Communication Studies. Being plus size for the majority of her life she has overcome many obstacles to finally come to the point where she is fully content with herself and her life. This self love has also allowed Ms Suga the privilege of sharing her love with those around her. She is very passionate about life and loves to help others.

     Ms Suga likes to see herself as the one everyone can go to for positive, inspirational and truthful words of advice and/or support. She is the Beautiful Inspirational Girl that is blessed, intellectual, trustworthy, caring and hardworking.

     Ms Suga has had a passion for writing since she was a little girl when she used to think of short stories about what her life would be like as she got older. This is Ms Suga’s first opportunity for her thoughts to be public for the world to see. Excited about this column Ms Suga is also very optimistic of her future in writing and promoting self love and acceptance in the plus size community.

 

"I is what I is"

with Ms Suga

 

 First things first let me put out my disclaimer right now that this month’s article is NOT I repeat NOT about PD, racism or anything of the like. I just liked the statement and I think it applies to the overall spirit of this column which is to inspire you all to be a better you in any and every way possible.

 

Now...Can you believe summer is almost over and school will be starting back up very soon?? I know that bit of info doesn't apply to me but to you all out there getting ready for another term in school...GOOD LUCK! I did my time and am now attempting to pay my debt and I am in NO RUSH to go back.

 

Anyway lately I have observed several seemingly random events that have caused me to wonder "where did we go wrong?" The first two instances have to deal with two children being murdered solely based on a person judging them. Granted I am not here to talk about guilt or innocence because it is not my place to do so. I believe we all need to and will be tried for our wrong doings so it's not up to me to decide the fate of anyone other than myself. My point in mentioning these two instances is that two children are DEAD because someone assumed something and the reactions to those assumptions were FATAL.

 

The next instance is very, very personal and the most I will say to it is that I've noticed that people, who used to be closest to me, have decided to pass judgment on me for one reason or another and as a result their attitudes towards me have changed dramatically. These changes in attitudes have caused me to reflect on my relationships with several people and wonder what went wrong and what have I done to contribute to the problem. 

 

The final example is with this book I'm reading the series is called Bloody Jack's Adventures and basically it's about a girl living in and trying to grow up in the early 1800s. So basically what happens in the books is that this girl goes through all types of life experiences that no child should go through and the main problem for it all is because people treat her a certain way because she's a girl.

 

Now to anyone else these instances really don't have anything to do with each other. But in actuality...they have one major common denominator...other people's opinions directly affecting one's life. Hopefully you are still with me. For a long time I lived my life how everyone else wanted me to. My parents, friends, teachers, I was breaking my neck to literally try to be the person everyone else wanted and I was miserable beyond words. Then came the rebellion when I was like "F*** the world and everyone in it" (thank God I got passed that phase). As our faithful readers know I use my life as an example of my messages because when you know better you do better. And now that I know I want to pass my knowledge along and hope you don't make the same mistakes I did.

 

So don't be like Ms. Suga okay? Don't live your life for others. And surly don't allow anyone else to cause you not to live the life you want. My mom told me "Don't let anyone steal your joy baby. If they are feeding, financing or freaking you then their opinion doesn't matter." It took a while for that to sink in and when it did it was like "Duh!" I is what I is, or to be proper, I am what I am and that's all that I am (Cuz I’m Popeye the sailor man!! TOOT TOOT!!!!!)

 

It's so easy for us as people to go through life thinking we have to look this way and act that way because we have so many different images shoved at us telling us that what these people say is law. But you don't have to be no one other than who you are! If you're a nerd that loves playing Sims and other fantasy world games then go for it. If you want to be a fashion designer, hair stylist, painter or actor Get the right training. Perfect your craft. Don't let anyone tell you what you can and cannot do. Now some stuff might not be for you but if you love it and it's within your skills GO FOR IT! Be the person you were born to be!

 

My coworkers call me "Bookworm" because from the time I clock in every morning to when I clock out in the evening I have my headphones in and 95% of the time I'm listening to a book. Yea the clown me but do you think that matters? I have 2 library accounts as well as an audible account and I can clear a whole book in one day at work. So what? I is what I is...a natural hair high-top fade wearing, can't leave the house without makeup and earrings nerd that loves to take pictures and will blow up at you and give you my last dollar within 15 minutes.

 

But hey I is what I is. So the question remains "WHO ARE YOU?" (In my Cheshire cat voice)

 

Peace, Love and Hair Grease! 

~Ms. Suga~

 

 

 


 

Kathy is originally from a small town in Michigan but has lived in San Diego County since she's been 18 years old.  Kathy graduated from San Diego State University with a Bachelors in Finance in 1999.   She has a real estate broker’s license and works as a mortgage banker.  

 

Kathy also owns BBW Club Catalina in San Diego which has monthly night club parties and other fun events on a frequent basis.  Kathy has been an avid supporter of NAAFA, Vegas BBW Bash and San Diego BBW Bash and believes in size acceptance and health at every size.  

 

Kathy is a firm believer that people need to have a full life by going to the movies, dinner, bowling, dancing and anything that will make them a happier person and not wait till they are at the perfect size to start living their life to the fullest. 

 

Kathy is in her mid-40's and her children are grown and living productively on their own.   In her spare time she likes trying new restaurants, dancing, modeling, bowling and spending time with family and friends.

 

 

When you make more Money than He does!

 with Kathy Edmondson

We all know that relationships are hard because of many different topics, but one of the top reasons for disagreements, or discussions in a relationship is money.   We have to remember that back in the 50's, 60's 70's it wasn't at all the normal scenario, that a woman, would make more money than a man.   The family structure was set up where in many homes, the mothers stayed at home with the children, and made sure the home was taken care of, so she didn't work like many of us do today.   When the women did work, it was usually part time, or not what we would consider a career.   We were told that we would have to choose between having a career, and having a family, if we were a woman.   We have found out that we can have both, if we really want it, although we do have to sacrifice some time spent either at work or with our family at times.  

 

There are so many more opportunities for women to be CEO's or CFO's of large companies, and support for women to start their own businesses.    I also think when men typically made more money than women did, that the men were also making most of the financial decisions, on where, and when, to spend the money they were bringing into the family.   What happens now when the women in the relationship, makes more money than the men do?  

 

I think it's great that women are having successful careers, making more money, and making more decisions, on their own financial futures, but what happens when the men these women are dating, aren't making nearly as much as the women they are with?    There is the issue of a man's ego when he doesn't make as much money, and doesn't want the woman he is with paying his way to travel, eat at restaurants, or he isn't able to buy the woman things, he thinks she would want.   It has become more acceptable today for a woman who is working, and making a good living, to take turns paying for meals in restaurants, movies and travel, when dating a man.  Still a lot of us, whether we are male or female, remember the days when the man, was the main bread winner, and we have mixed feelings, or are uncertain, of what is acceptable or not when dating.  

 

What do you do, when the person you are dating, doesn't make enough money to take the vacations, or trips that you want to?   There are many solutions to this problem, and there will need to be an open communication, regarding the best way to solve the issue, when the woman makes more money than the man, and she would still like to travel, or do other things that require more financial resources.    

 

For example: if the woman wants to take a 7 day cruise, and this isn't within the budget of the man she is dating, than she can go with a girlfriend, or family member on the 7 day cruise.    Another option would be to have the man pay what he can afford and the woman can help pay the remaining balance for this particular trip.   There are always things we can do when we are dating someone that is cost effective but are also a lot of fun.  

 

There are reduced rates at the movie theatres for movies in the morning or afternoons, versus going at night for full price.   The drive in can offer 2 movies for as low as $7, at many drive in theatres you can bring your own sodas, candy and popcorn.    I think the main thing to be concerned with in this situation is that both of you are sharing in the financial costs as much as possible, and no one is feeling used or taken advantage of.   

 

 

 

Celebrating almost two decades as a Graphic Designer/Published Illustrator, Jean Nerestant Jr (Jness) got his start as a graphic artist in 1994, Still working as a graphic designer by day/ Jness devotes time to his hip hop Culture, comic book art and Plus size/BBW Art.

 

 

Confidence

with Jness


One thing I have learned in forty something odd years of living is that life is richly and abundantly saturated with challenges that seem to be tailor made for the purpose of testing character and moral integrity. With that being said, I am sure that many of you might agree with that theory. Then if that is the true purpose of life’s mountains and valleys, we have to strive for that bitter sweet spot of righteous unwavering character. This is the very virtue that greatness is gleaned from. As complicated as an individual’s life can be, my careful review has lead me to believe that there are two ways to walk through life, with your head up or with your head down.

When you choose one of these methods of walking through life several things happen. The first thing that either posture can affect is how you feel about yourself. Walking with your head down makes your outlook one of defeat. For example a track runner would have a difficult time gaging a rapidly approaching hurdle with their head down.

When attempting to clear obstacles, it is better to keep your head up, because it makes a statement of confidence to every onlooker and challenger. Hence the second thing that is affected by your posture, the way you are perceived by others. Keep your head up. In reality every runner can’t win the race but, how it was run, and how you finish makes you a winner and a force to be reckoned with.

This month’s new illustration features a fashionable curvy beauty, and diva in the making. This piece is called CONFIDENCE. It makes reference to, how a person feels, how they want to be received, and most importantly who they are. Dress your best, be your best, show you’re very best, and don’t yield to every invitation that comes your way to distract you. You are far too valuable for that, Big, with much more to offer, beautiful in so many ways and ready for the world. You are poised for the challenge and confident of what the outcome will be.

 JNESS

LargeInCharge Hopes that you enjoyed this article. 

Our writer and artistic contributor JNess will be taking a vacation

so please enjoy his previous artwork and writing in

our other 2013 LargeInCharge Magazine Issues.

Check out Jness in our Back-Issues

 

 

 

 

Hello there all my fashion loving friends. My name is Amy Lucas and in this column I hope to bring you some new outfits that will make you feel great and be Large and In Charge. My whole life has not been devoted to fashion as my background is in teaching Spanish, Math, and Science. I also have a master’s degree in Central Office Administration.

 

With that said, I have been wearing plus sizes for as long as I can remember so I do know the struggles we all face to find cute clothes. I come from a smaller town in Michigan, which means I have an even harder time finding plus size clothing in my area since the choices are so limited; as well as, the sizes and styles each store carries. 

 

Out of necessity, I started looking online instead of just settling for the places here and have found that other women could use the help too. I run a fashion group on Facebook called BBW Fashion where I post something fabulous each day hoping to help all those to find what they want in their size.

 

In my career, I've helped plus size students and their parents to find fashion in their sizes that would help them with their self-esteem and make them feel good about themselves. I have also dabbled in fashion before this modeling for three different stores, winning a cover model spot in July of 2012 in Large in Charge magazine, and I was Ms. LBC 2008 for Linda's Big Connections in Chicago. I look forward to showing you what is available in plus size fashion and help you to look even more beautiful and chic.

 

 

 
Brial Gowns and Accesories
with Amy Lucas

There are so many gorgeous bridal gowns in the marketplace a woman can find the dress of her dreams easily. Designers like Alfred Angelo, Maggie Sottero, Allure Bridals, Bonny Bridals, and Mori Lee create fabulous gowns that will catch your eye every season. Bridal accessories can also add some sparkle and beauty to your special day and there’s no better place than Etsy to get them. I have chosen some of the most figure flattering and stunning gowns available to wear now.

 

No matter which you choose you will dazzle your friends and family.

 

 

Classic  

Style No. 3343 by Mori Lee,

sizes 16-32,

available in ivory or white,

$606.00

www.houseofbrides.com

Enchanted Plus Size Wedding Gown,

sizes 12-32,

$305.00

www.igigi.com

Fantastic Empire One-Shoulder

Floor-Length Beaded

Plus Size Wedding Dress,

sizes 2-26,

available in five colors,

$232.89,

www.dreamprom.com

Embellished V Neckline Organza

Gown Style No. 3142

by Mori Lee,

sizes 16-32,

available in ivory/silver or white/silver, $880.00

www.bestbridalprices.com

Strapless  

Beaded Embroidery on Lustrous Satin No.3128

by Mori Lee,

sizes 16-32,

available in white/silver or ivory/silver, $1,058.00

www.plussizebridal.com

Pretty Sleeveless Sheath/Column

Floor-Length Wedding Dress,

available in three colors,

sizes 2-26,

$298.98,

www.weddingdressbee.net

Tulle Lace Gown

Style 2513

by Allure Bridals,

sizes 2-32,

available in three colors,

$918.00

www.missesdressy.com

Strapless Chiffon Gown

Style 2171W

by Alfred Angelo,

sizes 16-26,

available in ivory or white,

$799.00

www.bestbridalprices.com

Mermaid / Fit and Flare Gowns  

Beaded Appliquéd Mermaid Wedding Dress Style 1314

by Bonny Bridal,

sizes 16-32,

available in three colors,

$1,350.00

www.bestbridalprices.com

Tara

by Maggie Sottero,

sizes 0-28,

available in ivory or white,

$899.00

www.bestbridalprices.com

Ruffled Skirt Wedding Gown

Style No. 3124

by Mori Lee,

sizes 16-32,

available in white or ivory,

$954.00

www.plussizebridal.com

One Shoulder

Trumpet/Mermaid Organza Wedding Dress, available in five colors,

sizes 2-26,

$498.98,

www.weddingdressbee.net

Gowns with Sleeves  

Eugenia Vintage Plus Size Wedding Gown, sizes 12-32,

$570.00

www.igigi.com

Lace Organza Keyhole Back Gown

Style 2611

by Allure Bridals,

sizes 2-32,

available in white/silver or ivory/silver, $958.00

www.missesdressy.com

Milana S5221

by Maggie Sottero,

sizes 0-28,

available in four colors,

$883.00

www.bestbridalprices.com

Luxe Lace Wedding Dress,

sizes 10-32,

available in ivory or white,

$242.00

www.kiyonna.com

Unconventional Gowns  

Elegant Sleeveless

with Natural Waist Wedding Dress,

sizes 2-26,

available in five colors,

$458.98,

www.weddingdressbee.net

Esmeralda High Low Wedding Dress,

sizes 10-30,

$899.00

www.realsizebride.com

Sexy Sweetheart Empire Waist

with Multilayer Skirt Wedding Dress, available in seven colors,

sizes 2-26,

$288.98

www.weddingdressbee.net

Ingenue
Style SC5029
in blush,
sizes 14-32,
$278.00
www.sydenyscloset.com
Brial Accesories from Etsy  

Vintage Lace Birdcage Veil,

$45.00

available in three colors,

Lovely Ever After store at www.etsy.com

Ivory Silk Organza Flower Hair Clip

and Birdcage Veil,

$120.00

Wearable Arts store at www.etsy.com

Plus Size Garter Set in White Stretch Lace with Rhinestone Details,

$38.00

available in four colors,

Art House Bridal store at www.etsy.com

The MONROE Couture

Vintage Inspired Garter Set,

$74.99,

Southern Ever After store at www.etsy.com

Wedding Jewelry Set,

$119.84,

The Fab Bridal Jewelry store at www.etsy.com

Victorian’s Style Three Strands Bridal Pearls Necklace and Crystal Hair Comb Set, $190.00

Only Handmade Jewelry store at www.etsy.com

Wedding Dress Sash in Pink Champagne, $173.25,

Design Your Pedestal at www.etsy.com

Swarovski Wedding

Sash- Silver beaded belt,

$85.00

Glam House at www.etsy.com

Ivory Wedges Matching Ivory Bow, available in medium and wide widths,

$265.00

Design Your Pedestal store at www.etsy.com

Ivory Platform Heels with Lace Overlay and Ivory Flowers with Silver Rhinestones, available in medium and wide widths, $383.25

Design Your Pedestal store at www.etsy.com

Champagne Lace Peeptoes with Gold Rhinestone Heels and Gold and Rose Rhinestone Butterflies,

available in medium and wide widths,

$380.00

Design Your Pedestal store at www.etsy.com

Small Diamante Brooch Bouquet,

$249.00

Blue Petyl store at www.etsy.com

WOW Gorgeous Bridal Brooch Bouquet, available in three colors,

$198.00

Elegant Wedding Decor by Joanne store at www.etsy.com

Sarina Bridal Clutch,

$84.00

Bijoux and Couture store at www.etsy.com

White Bridal Wedding Clutch,

$70.00

Weddings with Flair store at www.etsy.com

   
   
   
   
   
 
 
 

Jay Hansen and Heidi Davis are size-acceptance advocates from Oklahoma and co-own Oklahoma's only social size-acceptance group, Oklahoma BBW, BHM, and their Admirers. Heidi was born in 1969 and has been a large woman her whole life, just as Jay has been an admirer of such plus-sized women all of his.

 

Heidi graduated High School in 1987, which is the same year Jay was born. The two met online in 2005 and quickly developed a friendship. In 2009, Jay graduated the University of Central Oklahoma with a Bachelor’s in English Education, and the following year he and Heidi started dating and quickly fell deeply in love.

 

Heidi is experienced, blunt, pragmatic, down-to-earth, and strong in every sense of the word, while Jay is intellectual, articulate, ideological, contemplative, and gentle. Heidi is eighteen years Jay's senior and nearly three times his weight, while Jay is 140 pounds soaking wet with a brick in his pocket. He's a king amongst nerds and all things geeky; she's a tattooed, rough-and-tumble, hard rocker to her core. Together, they are a beautiful personification of the old adage opposites attract.

 

"The Skinny on Big Love with Jay Hansen" was started in 2013 with Jay as the primary writer and Heidi as his muse and endless source of ideas and inspiration. Together, the two hope to provide people with a new frame of mind on love and relationships, promote open-mindedness and acceptance, ask intriguing questions, foster conversations, and prove to the world that titles such as weight and age, amongst countless others, should never stand in the way of one's pursuit of happiness.


 
Grow the Hell Up!
with Jay Hansen
 

As you read this my partner Heidi and I are out enjoying the Well Rounded Las Vegas BBW event. Hopefully I haven't snapped from the disruption of my sleep schedule, Heidi hasn't tried to cut a bitch for waving hello at me in a drunken stupor, or any other occurrences worthy of the plot to the next Hangover movie. Of course, one can only hope.

 

In our community, it's no secret that women frequently, and unfortunately, lack the self-confidence and self-respect of women more conformed to society's definition of "beauty." Because of this, especially at large BBW events as Heidi and I frequently attend, there are significantly more men of ill repute that seek to take advantage of women. Don't get me wrong; there's nothing wrong with a healthy, active sex life, and it's not a majority of men or fat admirers by a long shot, but it is still enough to stigmatize portions of the fat admirer population and to warrant caution for plus-sized women when a man suddenly takes interest in them.

The first is a type of man that exists in every community, sub-culture, and social group on the planet - the cheater. Women in the size community, for the reasons mentioned above, can make easier targets for these men because of their frequent lack of self-respect. Usually, cheaters and liars depend on subtly undermining a woman's confidence or coercing her to drink more alcohol than she should to wear down a woman. In the size community, society unfortunately does this work for them. The best way for a woman to protect herself from being taken advantage of by these men, then, is a healthy degree of self-respect. Outside of that, though, there are some signs women can look for to protect themselves.

 

First and foremost just ask about their relationship status. It's remarkable how many of these men are ignorant and self-absorbed enough to just be upfront about their disloyalty. Other, smaller signs, however, are safer ways to test the waters of a man's sincerity. For example, if a man says he is "separated" from his wife, but that they still live together, consider that a red flag. If he lives locally, but won't give you his home phone or is unwilling to bring you back to his place, consider that another red flag. If he's only taking you out to places far from where he lives or is just simply checking the time far too often, don't be afraid to demand some answers.

 

Other than cheaters, however, there is another type of male that is more unique to the size community that women should beware. There’s no simple, self-explanatory title for these men, but I refer to them as “moped” fat admirers based on an old, offensive joke I heard from an equally offensive man. These are the men that live by the ideology “fat girls are like mopeds; they’re fun to ride, until someone sees you with one.” The title “closeted” fat admirer isn’t quite right to describe these men, because closeted implies they’re just too shy or scared to even get involved with plus-sized women in the first place because of social stigmas. A “moped” fat admirer, though, is more than willing to hook up with a larger woman, but nothing more than that. He is unwilling to introduce her to his friends or family, he is unwilling to be seen in public with her, and he rarely lets the relationship evolve much beyond casual sex.

 

Some people may claim that such a relationship is what they want, but those that do don’t seem to understand the great damage they do to the size-acceptance movement and to themselves when they accept such treatment. Honestly, these men sicken me, and in some ways are even worse than cheaters. Cheaters just have a generic disregard for the feelings and self-worth of other people in general; “moped” fat admirers specifically target the plus-size, further damage their already weakened self-esteem, and reaffirm all the false, negative stereotypes of large women somehow being undesirable. And why? Because they’re afraid of what others will think of them? Because they’re afraid of being teased for being with a fat girl? Grow the hell up!

 

It’s an unfortunate fact that there will always be people, (primarily men) that prey on the insecurities of others for their own sexual gratification. In a community where self-esteem, self-confidence, and self-worth are as fragile and hard to find as it is in the size community, it is up to all of us as members of it to stop this from happening. Behavior such as this should not be tolerated, especially by those in positions of authority. Our BBW group in Oklahoma has strict rules to prevent cheating both at group functions and on our online groups. We would encourage other groups and organizations to adopt similar measures to protect their own. All too often though, the wrong men are not only tolerated, but held up as role models or some sort of "champions" of male, sexual conquest, which not only sickens me, but depresses me to no end.

 

Above all, these men are a testament to why any fat admirer with a shred of decency needs to be an active participant in fighting fat hate and discrimination in society, even if they themselves are not plus-sized. By doing our part to fix misconceptions about weight and size, we can help build the self-esteem, self-confidence, and self-worth of the very people these men exploit over their lack of these very qualities, greatly hindering their ability to do so in the first place. If you’re not strong enough to fight the battle against fat hate then you don’t deserve to be a part of our community to begin with, let alone experience the bountiful love and joy of a large woman.

 

 

I was born in San Diego, California on August 30, 1972.

Grew up in San Jose, San Francisco, and San Diego California. I Graduated from San Diego State University in 1996 with a Bachelors Degree in Journalism (Radio-TV News) and a Bachelors Degree in Political Science.

I interned with U.S. Senator Dianne Feinstein from 1995-1996.

I interned with CBS News during the 1996 Republican National Convention.

Currently I'm a Licensed Sales Representative with Pacific Shores Real Estate, Inc. in Solana Beach, California

I'm Co-Owner of Club Catalina BBW Night Club in San Diego, CA.

And a newlywed, married to Kathy Edmondson as of December 31, 2012.

I am the father of one daughter - Safiyah Edmondson (8) and stepfather to two young men, Alexander Hernandez (22) and John Rhakman Macklin (21).

I enjoy bowling, basketball, tennis, football. I play 12 musical instruments. I also design a web page for a real estate company.
 

Criticism From Within

with David Edmondson

    

It’s the summer time, which means most people are fascinated with maintaining their definition of the perfect body. Whether people choose to starve themselves to get that chiseled look or fit into that outfit. While physical appearance is a constant fascination throughout the year, it is even more magnified during the months of June through September.  If you don’t believe me, check out other publications and their swimsuit editions or turn on the television and you will see the number of extreme fitness weight loss shows, which have increased in number on the traditional networks. Naturally, those who are of bigger size are stared at, pointed towards and hear the whispers from others who choose to ridicule them simply because they have a lack of self esteem. But how do you handle the criticism from someone that was once just like you?

     They have no doubt lost the weight and changed their lifestyle and have fallen into one of the following subcategories:

A) This is how I lost the weight and you need to do exactly as I did to succeed;

B) I can’t be seen with you because I’ve changed my life with the weight loss;

C) You can’t possibly be happy with being big.

 

     They are convinced that they have all the answers because after all, they were once in your position and understand the pressure and the constant strain that being bigger supposedly brings to an individual. This leaves you in a predicament. On the one hand, you are happy that your friend successfully made their goal and changed their way of living. However, you don’t want to be pressured or forced to conform to a lifestyle that you may not agree with. So how do you handle the situation?

 

     One way, is to remind this friend or loved one that the decision they made was their personal decision and they did this to make themselves happy. We need to remind ourselves that happiness does not begin or end with being smaller; rather it begins and ends with our own self esteem and personal growth. I am proud of myself, no matter my size and it has no impact on how I treat others or wish to be treated.  Those who are truly your friends or loved ones will love you know matter what your size may happen to be. Those who continue to ridicule you or try to make you feel guilty about being of bigger size, the best way to handle their criticism is to rid yourself of the excess negativity. Sometimes, just lifting that excess weight from your shoulders is healthier for your body, mind and soul than any physical exercise you could ever choose to perform.

 

 

 
 
 

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