10 Frightening Ways We Discriminate Against Fat People
10 Frightening Ways We Discriminate Against
Written by: Morris M. September 27, 2013
It’s no secret that fat people get a pretty
raw deal. Aside from things like diabetes and heart attacks, they have
put up with the rest of us covertly filming
them in Walmart and uploading the “hilarious” results to YouTube. But
anti-fat discrimination goes way beyond gentle mocking and into some
dark, frightening territory.
10 Medical Biases
Most doctors want to help people. That’s why they become doctors instead
of, say, dictators—to make a positive difference in people’s lives.
Unless, that is, their patient happens to be fat.
Earlier this year, two separate studies revealed that medical students
show a strong subconscious bias against
fat people. According to the researchers, fat patients are less
likely to be treated with respect, more likely to be the butt of jokes
and, perhaps understandably, more likely to switch their primary care
provider than skinny people. As if that wasn’t enough, some hospitals in
Britain have even started to ban patients with a BMI over 30 from having
any routine sugery. Those banned surgeries, by the way, include knee and hip
operations—things you’d think have nothing to do with your waistline.
When questioned about this flagrant violation of the Hippocratic oath,
54 percent of doctors said they were totally cool with denying fat people
treatment—meaning they haven’t even got the excuse of their hatred being
9 Legal Discrimination
A word of advice—if you’re going before a
jury, try not to be fat and female. A Yale study from last year
discovered that male jurors were more likely to convict a fat woman than a skinny one for the same crime. It
goes way beyond bored jurors mentally playing “hot or not” with the
defendant—male jurors faced with a fat woman were quicker to label her a
“repeat offender” with “awareness of her crimes.”
In short, it seems that men subconsciously associate fatness with
criminality in women, regardless of the facts of the case and despite it
being totally illogical. Add that to earlier studies that suggest juries
are more lenient with slim, good-looking people, and you’d be forgiven for thinking that
the world objectively hates the overweight.
8 Ruined Careers
Unless you’re applying to be a firefighter or basketball star or Playboy
bunny, your weight arguably has no bearing on how well you can do your
job. Yet study after study has found that hiring managers and senior
really hate fat people. One study gave a bunch of HR-types identical resumes
with before and after weight-loss surgery photos attached. They found
that the resumes with before photos scored far lower on assessments of
things like leadership potential and starting salary, despite belonging
to the same person.
As dumb as that is, it creates real-world problems for overweight
According to some figures, fat women earn on average up to $19,000 less than their
identically skilled skinny counterparts. That’s as much as some people
earn in a year down the drain, all because we as a culture don’t dig fat
7 Welfare Discrimination
Since we make it so hard for fat people to achieve at work, you’d think
we’d at least be a little more lenient when it comes to dishing out
welfare. But it turns out that government bodies hate obesity just as
much as the rest of us—and that can lead to some insane consequences.
Earlier this year, the UK government announced plans to
cut welfare for fat people who don’t go to the gym. In other words, for those at the
bottom of the social scale, their ability to pay rent may soon be
directly linked to how much they exercise—unless they’re skinny, in
which case no one cares if they just sit about playing Xbox. The most
insane part of all this is that studies have shown as many as
60 percent of people of a “normal weight” may be just as unhealthy
as their fatter counterparts and equally prone to an early death. So a
fair system would get everyone to the gym, but when is discrimination
Here’s a bizarre statistic—if you’re fat, you’re more likely to be
homeless. It’s true. Despite our mental image of extreme poverty
involving rake-thin hobos searching desperately for a meal, the reality
shows that homelessness and obesity go practically hand-in-hand.
A two-year study of the Boston homeless population, found only 1.6
percent of those on the streets were underweight. By contrast, nearly 66
percent were overweight, with 32 percent
classed as obese. Thanks to capitalism’s amazing ability to produce junk
food at phenomenally cheap prices, our society is currently flying in
the face of all human history by ensuring that you’ll probably be fatter
after losing your house than beforehand. And this is becoming
apparent across all income levels—wealthy people tend to be skinnier,
while poorer people tend to be larger.
5 We Punish Fat Children
We’ve all heard some variation on the phrase “only a mother could love
that face”—it harks back to the cultural myth that parents will love
their children regardless of their faults. And while that might be true
for your average dog-faced kid, it sure as hell isn’t for his overweight
reported on a study that suggested parents subconsciously penalize their
for being overweight. By looking at students who owned cars, researchers
discovered that obese kids were less likely to get financial assistance
from their parents when buying their first vehicle than their skinnier
counterparts. This suggests that even parents buy into the cultural myth
that fat people are
inherently lazy and need to learn some discipline.
4 The Boy Scouts Ban
For a group that’s frequently associated with
child abuse and
rampant homophobia, you’d think the Boy Scouts would need all the friends
they can get. But in June this year, the organization decided to add fat
people to the list of things it discriminates against, by
banning obese children from attending its regular Jamboree, a sort of summer
camp held every four years.
Worst of all, this ban was based solely on the BMI of the children
involved, despite BMI being a dumb way to measure health—a high BMI
might mean you’re heavy, but it’s totally possible to be both heavy and
in robust health, which is at least part of the reason sumo wrestlers
don’t all drop dead at the age of 20. Yet the Scouts effectively
outlawed any kid with a BMI of over 32 from joining their
once-in-a-lifetime celebration, despite that making zero sense.
3 Eternal Bullying
Still, let’s say the Scouts let those heftier kids in. What would
happen? That’s right—bullying, Endless, merciless, hideous bullying.
Now, the fact that kids pick on one another may be nothing new, but the
sheer extent of their hatred for the overweight surely is—obese kids are
65 percent more likely to be bullied at school than their average-weight
counterparts, a number so large it’s mind-boggling. And it’s getting
In 2003, researchers reproduced a 1961 study that showed children
pictures of six other kids, including one obese child, and asked them to
rank how much they disliked them. On the whole, the ’60s kids tended to
dislike the obese kid the most, but by 2003 there was no contest. The
modern children showed a whopping 41
extra antipathy toward the fat kid, for no reason other than his weight.
Another study showed that overweight people who get bullied are more
stay overweight than those who don’t. So that bullied fat kid everyone
hates is going to probably stay fat and bullied and hated for the rest
of his life.
2 Patient Biases
But before you start getting all worked up about uncaring doctors, you
should be aware that it cuts both ways. Patients are less likely to
overweight doctor and more likely to ignore their advice than they are a
skinny doctor’s, with a direct correlation between declining levels of
trust and a physician’s expanding waistline.
It’s almost as if we believe fat has the magical ability to erase
people’s memories of medical school, or that all overweight people are
automatically on an intellectual par with Homer Simpson. And we’ll
apparently go on believing that even when they’re actively trying to
save our lives.
1 Global Hatred
In 2011, a worldwide study discovered that anti-fat prejudice was
becoming a global reality. Even cultures such as that of American Samoa,
where 95 percent of adults are obese, and Puerto Rico, where fat used to
be celebrated, now display bias against the overweight. In
every single country monitored, obesity had become associated with
laziness and a lack of self-control, with the sole exception of
Tanzania, where skinniness is still associated with death from HIV. Even
there, attitudes were classed as “neutral” as opposed to “fat-friendly.”
In other words, if you have a plus-sized waist, the entire world is
demonstrably, objectively against you. And there’s not a thing you can
do about it.
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COVER MODEL INTERVIEW
LargeInCharge.com: What is your name?
LargeInCharge.com: Where are you from and what is your current
I’m from Ohio and I’m located in Byesville
LargeInCharge.com: Can you give us some information about yourself
(Age, Height, Size, Nationality, Marital Status, Children, etc.)?
I’m a white BBW female 26 years old a mother of 2 amazing beautiful
adopted kids whom I love with my whole heart and soul. I’m married
and have been for over 8 years.
LargeInCharge.com: Were you a big child, or did you gain weight
later in life?
I started beginning to gain weight around 4th grade.
LargeInCharge.com: (If you were a big child) how did you feel
growing up as a large child?
I was sad, depressed about it. I remember seeing some of my peers
and how some of the females especially were very thin and it made me
really want to “fit in”.
LargeInCharge.com: What made you decide to enter the LargeInCharge
I started being an online BBW model with a company called Luscious
Loves. I adore them so much especially the owner Jessica Camp. I had
really bad low self-esteem and self-confidence issues. Practically
all my life and being a model on here is really breaking me through
my shell. I’m finally becoming the women that I have always been
destined to be. I’m me and that’s what matters!
LargeInCharge.com: Did you find it a hard journey to be accepted for
your size, and do you find acceptance among your family and friends?
I did find it hard and even still do at times. Health issues can
happen no matter what size you are. When your heavier you can have a
lot of risk factors. However I feel pretty healthy and happy women.
My family and friends love me for the women I am.
LargeInCharge.com: What would you say inspires you most in life?
My passion for life! I have a drive that is unstoppable.
LargeInCharge.com: What is your primary occupation, and how did you
get into this line of work?
Actually I’m just a mom. It’s not just a “mom” that’s one of the
hardest job’s you will ever have in your life. Like I said
previously I’m a mom of 2. My children are adopted and I do not
refer them as “adopted” children in their faces. However, my son
does have special issues going on. So that’s a struggle all on its
own. I deal with what comes our way though.
LargeInCharge.com: What changes do you believe should take place for
Large People in the work force?
I think acceptance is the biggest issues that society plays on us
“larger” girls, guys. I think that we should unite as one and stress
that we all are only skin and we all have feelings and that it does
LargeInCharge.com: What do you think about the fashion industry for
big sized clothing?
I think it could be better! I know I would love to wear something a
“thin” person wears but the sizes are never in my size.
LargeInCharge.com: What do you wish to see change with the fashion
I want to see BBW’s walk the run way just as the thin girls does. I
want to see that smile and happiness on their face because they
finally feel they took the power back! We are beautiful!
LargeInCharge.com: Tell us some of the places you buy your clothing
from.Do you have any
I normally buy my clothes from normal stores such as Walmart, Kmart.
Nothing fancy but it’s what I can afford and what I can find in my
do you prepare for a Photo shoot?
What should aspiring models be prepared for? I prepare by getting
dolled up as best as I can. I have learned to be prepared for
anything to happen and to go wrong ….it could be good or bad.
LargeInCharge.com: Look at Size acceptance five years ago... look at
size acceptance now.
What changes do you see?
Honestly not much of a difference. I see over-weight people get made
fun of just as much as I see overly-thin people get made fun of. It
seems that society plays a huge role on us. It seems that there
never is an even ground.
LargeInCharge.com: Tell us about your goals as far as modeling and
My goals were to focus on my own self issues. Now that I’m really
working well on that and feeling great I want to focus on showing
especially over weight teen age girls that it’s ok to be that size
20. It’s ok and that we all just need love too.
have you accomplished as a Plus Sized Model?
I have accomplished myself worth. I feel so grateful to just be me.
I owe that to my Luscious Loves girls.
LargeInCharge.com: Can you tell us about an inspirational moment in
your life that made you feel good about your size.
Yes, my son is 3 and everyday he reminds me how beautiful I am. My
son may use the term “chubby” example ….”Even though your chubby
mommy I love you and your beautiful”. I feel that it starts at home.
Especially with our children and being a parent I teach him that
feelings are feelings. Feelings matter and they are a part of how
someone may react to a certain situation.
LargeInCharge.com: Is there a person in your life that makes you
My children as they are my life. My children keep me happy and
smiling every day. I want to be a great person for them and for
LargeInCharge.com: What advice would you give to other people of
size who want to model?
I feel that it’s something to really think about. Negativity will be
a big factor. You may get a lot of hate mail, haters but don’t let
them ruin your style, your beauty and outlook on life. I feel if you
want to be a model, go for it.
LargeInCharge.com: Which plus size figure do you most admire?
I admire my boss Jessica Camp. Jessica is the most amazing, sweetest
women. I love her drive and passion for taking over the world by
storm. We are bbw’s but we are beautiful and determined.
LargeInCharge.com: Describe yourself with one word.
Thanks for reading about
Cover Model of the Month
Raqui the Owner and Founder of LargeInCharge.com, Raqui's "Tell it like it is" style of
writing has brought thousands to her blogs and millions to
LargeInCharge.com. There is so much behind the woman who has
brought this magazine into existence. Being Internationally
known as a wrestler/squasher lead the way to modeling for companies
and being featured in magazines and documentaries from all over the
world. She has made a career out of her size and personality.
Born and Raised in the Bronx NYC. This city girl is taking the world by
For almost a decade Raqui officially moved into Size Acceptance and Empowerment.
With the creation of LargeInCharge she took what she said to
individuals to a higher level and made it public to the internet
world. She is a woman who doesn't let things get to her. Knock her
down for the moment but she will rise up stronger and better.
Being a speaker on behalf of many subjects and counseling Plus Sized
people online her grace and style has made people love her. Raqui continues to set an example of a powerful woman who will bend
the world to fit her, her way.
Raqui's appearances include, Uk Television, German TV, Japan, Europe,
and the Spanish circuit. Her many magazines appearances have
been world wide. She has hit American Television in 2006 with
Good Morning American and since has appeared on The Cristina Show,
The Maury Show and The Tyra Banks Show.
This year LargeInCharge
has begun its 9th year moving toward our 10th. I challenged myself
this year by starting my own little quest
toward learning, giving, and expanding my own mind, by donating to a
new charity every month. I hope that you all will enjoy
learning about these new charities with me.
I began to
understand that most of us only donate to a charity
if we have an emotional connection to the charity itself or someone
who is trying to raise money for a cause. One day when I
happened to dismiss a charity that was asking for donations, I realized
I dont want to be that person. I want to give because the
cause is worthy and I can. Not only because of an emotional
connection. So join me in learning about new causes and
charities this year. I will post a new one to my column every
CHARITY OF THE MONTH: Love146.org
Love146 is an international human rights
organization working to end child trafficking and exploitation by
caring for survivors, providing prevention education to children,
training professionals working with exploited youth and empowering
an international movement of abolition. Since 2002, Love146 has
worked towards a sustainable, long-term and holistic approach to the
problem of child trafficking and exploitation, caring for children
throughout Asia, Europe and the United States. We're committed to
abolition, Nothing less.
The abolition of
child trafficking and exploitation, Nothing less.
Restoration! We combat child trafficking & exploitation with the
unexpected and restore survivors with excellence.
Slavery is still
one of the darkest stories on our planet. But for us, the hope of
abolition is a reality. Love146 believes in helping grow the
movement of abolition while providing effective, thoughtful
solutions. We believe in the power of Love and its ability to affect
sustainable change. Love is the foundation of our motivation. We
were founded in 2002 as Justice for Children International.
Love146 seeks to rise up and equip new Abolitionists
as well as give greater momentum to effective grassroots efforts. No
single effort will bring about the Abolition of child trafficking
and exploitation — it will be a movement united with a collective
shout. Traffickers are highly organized in their crime – we must be
more organized in our movement to undo and abolish their work. This
requires listening to those who know what’s up. This requires
networking to build relationships and communities committed to
ending this atrocity. This requires audacity. This requires
empowering a movement of Love.
Why the name Love 146?
In 2002, the
co-founders of Love146 traveled to Southeast Asia on an exploratory
trip to determine how they could serve in the fight against child
sex trafficking. In one experience, a couple of our co-founders were
taken undercover with investigators to a brothel where they
witnessed children being sold for sex. This is the story that
sparked our abolition movement.
ourselves standing shoulder to shoulder with predators in a small
room, looking at little girls through a pane of glass. All of the
girls wore red dresses with a number pinned to their dress for
blankly watching cartoons on TV. They were vacant, shells of what a
child should be. There was no light in their eyes, no life left.
Their light had been taken from them. These children…raped each
night… seven, ten, fifteen times every night. They were so young.
Thirteen, eleven… it was hard to tell. Sorrow covered their faces
with nothingness, except one girl, one girl who wouldn’t watch the
cartoons. Her number was 146. She was looking beyond the glass. She
was staring out at us with a piercing gaze. There was still fight
left in her eyes. There was still life left in this girl…
…All of these
emotions begin to wreck you. Break you. It is agony. It is aching.
It is grief. It is sorrow. The reaction is intuitive, instinctive.
It is visceral. It releases a wailing cry inside of you. It elicits
gut-level indignation. It is unbearable. I remember wanting to break
through the glass, to take her away from that place, to scoop up as
many of them as I could into my arms and to take all of them away.
I wanted to break through the
glass, to tell her to keep fighting, To not give up. To tell her
that we were coming for her…”
Because we went
in as part of an ongoing, undercover investigation on this
particular brothel, we were unable to immediately respond. Evidence
had to be collected in order to bring about a raid and eventually
justice on those running the brothel. It is an immensely difficult
problem when an immediate response cannot address an emergency.
Sometime later, there was a raid on this brothel and children were
rescued. But the girl who wore #146 was no longer there. We do not
know what happened to her, but we will never forget her. She changed
the course of all of our lives.”
President and Co-founder
We have taken
her number so that we remember why this all started, So that we must
tell her story. It is a number that was pinned to one girl but that
represents the millions enslaved. We wear her number with honor,
with sorrow, and with a growing hope. Her story can be a different
one for so many more.
Love is the foundation of our name because it is our
motivating drive to end the trafficking and exploitation of
children. Martin Luther King Jr. said, “Justice at its best is love
correcting everything that stands against love.” We hold that to be
A decade ago, one of the first needs we encountered as an
organization was the lack of safe places for children who were being
rescued out of exploitation. We began by supporting and expanding
existing safe homes throughout Asia, knowing that trafficked and
exploited children can be freed & restored only if effective
aftercare is waiting for them. That’s when we met award-winning
psychologist, Dr. Gundelina Velazco, who had a philosophy of
aftercare that required a different kind of safehome. So we built
Round Home In The Philippines
Round Home is uniquely built and designed to facilitate the
restoration and holistic health of every child entering its doors. A
tree house is used for therapy sessions. A volleyball court is
available to play on. There’s even a punching bag for children to
work out their aggression. The physical structure of the Round Home
is intended to promote reflectiveness, a sense of peace, freedom,
dignity and self-esteem, as well as playfulness so that children can
simply be children again.
The approach to
running the home is attuned to the needs of the exploited and
traumatized child, which include both the needs of ordinary children
as well as children who have been wounded in many ways, lack hope,
are broken, lack opportunities and self-worth. Therefore, the Round
Home is characterized by efforts to keep the child safe and well
provided for, instill hope, effect healing and restoration, promote
growth and development, facilitate the release of potentials, and
enable the child to come full circle, liberated from their traumas
and sufferings, to realize their innate worth. The Round Home aims
to be a safe base from which the girls can reside.
Reintegration and Family Reconciliation
not end when a girl leaves the Round Home. Love146 journeys with
girls, aiming for a holistic reintegration into society. It has been
commonly observed that when girls from safe homes are reintegrated
into their communities, they either get re-trafficked or return to a
community environment laced with shame issues, ongoing risk factors,
family dysfunction, stereotypes, and taboos. Love146 works to bring
families into the restoration process if possible, which sometimes
requires locating lost family members.
We would like to make a difference by giving our
reintegrated girls a better fighting chance. Our reintegration
research has shown what they need, foremost of which are livelihood,
education, and assistance in major life events. Like many Love146
programs, Reintegration is informed by and contributes to our
growing body of research.
Angie BEE grew-up a standard-sized young woman, educated in
communications, promotions and planning.She became a wife, mother and ministry support member while
building businesses and her faith.
Through stress, age and a poor diet and while suffering from major
depression and attempted suicide, Angie BEE's weight climbed from
180 pounds to 360 pounds.She was diagnosed with high blood pressure, diabetes,
obstructive sleep apnea, an overactive bladder and poor leg
circulation.At the age
of 40 an anxiety attack and the decline in her mental health forced
her to stop work and look at improving her declining health.It was during this time that Angie BEE became inspired by her
younger sister Sonya Bennett during her process towards Gastric
launched this column and will return occasionally to contribute to
it, but now that she is three years-post surgery... her life is
focused on something new!
Now, celebrating her first year of a new life since having the
procedure herself, Angie BEE is healthier than she has been in over
a decade.Losing the
first 100 pounds was just the bonus!She is now diabetes-free.She has normal blood pressure.The circulation in her legs is normal.She sleeps without a c-pap machine and more!The joy that she feels is documented each day in her
syndicated radio show, a brand new weeklyTV show documentary and each month in this article.The Big GB stands for The BIG Gastric Bypass and it also
stands for "Getting (my life) Back".This article reflects how Angie BEE's life has improved... by
the grace of God and as the result of having Gastric Bypass surgery
on Feb 28, 2011.This
is now her life!
I LOOK GOOD, I REALLY DO!
About a year ago, an old friend from college sent me a picture that
was taken back in 1984.
It was a picture of me dressed up like a Playboy Bunny on the campus
of Wilberforce University.The members of Alpha Phi Alpha Xi Chapter Fraternity had a
fundraiser ball and we Alpha Sweethearts dressed up as bunnies for
I am the bunny on the right.As I reflected on the picture with the memory that it brought
to me, I smiled to myself; I looked good!I really did!
On Easter Sunday, my then-fiancé and I drove to visit my daughter
who is away at school.
We all went out to dinner and afterwards took pictures together.It was still chilly outside in Jacksonville Florida on Easter
Sunday, so I wore my long-sleeved dress.My daughter took this picture of my Sweetie and I, and when I
reflected upon this picture I smiled at myself again: Not only is my
Sweetie a handsome "beast" of a man (lol) but I looked good again.I really and truly did!
Sometimes when we carry extra weight on us, we tend to shy away from
the camera during a special event.Sometimes we just don't even look at ourselves in the mirror.I remember a woman once telling me that she doesn't even want
to look at herself in the mirror while naked!This is a shame.
We need to love ourselves no matter what curves we carry, no matter
what we THINK we may look like.We need to love ourselves!
June was a busy month for me and my then-fiancé.As we tried to plan a wedding, we had events to tend to.I did book signings, my fiancé performed at concerts, we
attended his family reunion, 70's party and we worked the Daytona
Beach Juneteenth Celebration.At the family reunion, we dressed up in costumes and at the
Juneteenth Celebration I took a picture with a local politician (I
cropped him out the picture... no sense in giving him free publicity
in this reputable publication!).As I reflected back to review each of these pictures, I see
my curves, I see my smile and I see how great I looked.I really did!
In February 2011, I received gastric bypass surgery.I have lost almost 200 pounds.Yes, during the past month or so I do see that I have gained
a couple of pounds but I ain't worried; my Sweetie and I finally
stopped traveling and working ministry engagements and we married on
August 9th.The pounds
I gained have come from enjoying dessert and "bed rest" with my
I will get away from the sweet treats sometime soon!Yes, I had some health issues in June and July and even
thought I would have to undergo surgery but God saw fit for me to
enjoy my summer and not have to undergo a procedure.Now, I am looking forward to planning cosmetic surgery to
remove possibly 30 pounds of skin that hangs around my mid-section.My belly and sides have to carry this skin, but my back pain
is where I feel the most burden.I have an estimate from the plastic surgeon and now I am
working on securing the funding that I need to pay for the 50% that
my health insurance won't cover.I am not having this skin removed in order to increase my
good looks; I already look good, remember?I am removing this skin so I can remove the back pain, remove
my need for a girdle to help decrease the back pain and to remove
the flapping noises from sagging skin.This has everything to do with how I feel and the pain that I
Last month I participated in a book signing at the historic Wells
Built African American Museum in Orlando Florida.At the end of the event, my husband snapped a picture of me
next to the sign.He had
been telling me all day that I look lovely and his smile remained on
his face while I spoke before the audience.Once I took a look at the picture that he took of me, I could
really see what he was smiling about.I didn't see my fully midsection of belly from that excess
skin.I didn't see my full
un-sleeved arms.I didn't
see the sagging skin left over from an old double chin.All I saw was a beautiful, happy, healthy woman that serves
the Lord with gladness.I
saw a woman with a wonderful man by her side and I saw a great
smile.I looked pretty good
that day.I really did!
The Big GB - Getting My
Life back after Gastric Bypass
with Angie Bee
Founded in 1969, NAAFA is a non-profit
civil rights organization dedicated to improving the quality of life
for fat people. NAAFA works to eliminate discrimination based on
body size and provide fat people with the tools for self-empowerment
through public education, advocacy, and member support.
This Column is dedicated to the tremendous
work NAAFA has been doing for over four decades. LargeInCharge
wishes to support NAAFA in spreading the word of its work, and give
the public more information into issues we as plus sized people
should be aware of. The fight for equality for people of all
sizes is one we support.
This Column will include News Releases and
Calls to Action from NAAFA Directors.
This Column has been Approved by NAAFA.org
Good Samaritan Setting the Example: End Bullying Now!
NAAFA's END BULLYING NOW Campaign commends former Marine Wen Jones
of Florida for his bravery and for doing what should be done.
Mr. Jones has set the example for every one of us who may witness an
act of bullying. When Jones witnessed three men bullying a 14 year
old boy on Florida's Juno Beach, he stepped in to stop the attack.
The cost was personal pain and suffering as Jones was beaten
unconscious by the bullies, but he is the stuff of which heroes are
made. "You know doing the right thing is always the right
thing," stated Wen Jones.
·1 in 4 kids are bullied
·2.7 million students are bullied each year
56% of students have witnessed a bullying crime
School playground bullying statistics:
Every 7 minutes a child is bullied
No intervention -
Bullying is no longer exclusive to children and their peers on a
playground. There are no innocent by-standers. It is
time for us to speak up, stand up and put an end to bullying NOW!
The End Bullying Now Campaign incorporates all-volunteer teams
working with schools, communities and like-minded organizations to
change the bullying climate wherever it may be found. To learn
more about NAAFA’s End Bullying Now Campaign, write to Peggy Howell
to learn how you can become involved and bring this program to your
community. “Like” our Facebook page at:
The END BULLYING NOW Campaign is a program of NAAFA, a non-profit
human rights organization working to eliminate discrimination based
on body size and provide tools for self-empowerment through public
education, advocacy, and member support.
Founded in 1969, NAAFA is a non-profit human rights organization
dedicated to improving the quality of life for fat people. NAAFA
works to eliminate discrimination based on body size and provide fat
people with the tools for self-empowerment through public education,
advocacy, and member support.
Some of you make know me as web girl/Lulu from Fashion Find. Well…
I’ve move on to another one of my favorite’s pastime which is
cooking. To get you all up to date on what’s going on. I’m currently
pursuing a graduate degree at Ashford University I have a B.A.
degree in Organizational Communication from Southeastern Louisiana
I am most passionate about cooking. I believe with cooking you can
always grow… I fried my first egg when I was 2 and baked my first
cake at 5. Cooking is an easy and dynamic experience if you have a
passion for a good tasting meal.
Motto: Cook with your heart not with your head.
If you have a favorite dish you would like to share please forward
with recipe and photo to
with Lucia Roth
Party ideas… I was just sitting here
thinking that when it comes to having a party I am fresh out of
ideas. Not knowing what to serve is one of my biggest Ughhh!
Moment and not to mention a unique flaw I have because I am just
not a person with great merrymaking ideas.
when it came to writing this article I decided to look into easy
and sample and, let’s not forget it has to be great tasting
recipes that I like.
We are coming into the Holiday season. However, we don’t need to
wait for the holiday to have an exciting party idea and granted
this article is just in time for Halloween but why wait. Let’s
get the part started now.
Strawberry Cream Cheese Tea Sandwhiches
My Favorite Recipe from INDIGO TEA SHOP:
Strawberry Cream Cheese Tea Sandwiches
(perfect for holidays, parties, or anytime).
10 slices of white bread, crusts removed
4 oz strawberry cream cheese 4 strawberries
fresh mint leaves 1 3" heart shaped cookie cutter
Rinse the strawberries. Remove stems
and any leaves-pat dry. Slice thinly, then set
Using the heart shaped cookie cutter,
cut 10 hearts out of your white bread.
Generously cover the tops of the cut-out hearts with
strawberry cream cheese. Place one sliced
strawberry in the center of each heart.
Garnish the top of the strawberry with 2 fresh mint
Need Something Tasty to Drink?
Refrigerate until ready to serve.
Note: and if you’re looking to serve
no-alcoholic beverage try
grape sparkling cocktail Mango Passion Fruit
Sparkling Cocktail, Raspberry Limeade Sparkling
Cocktail, and Strawberry Lemonade Sparkling
Note:You can always double your recipe to hide
some for yourself…. Wink!
Ms Suga is a plus size woman hailing from Sunny South Florida. She
is a 24 year old recent recipient of a Bachelor in Arts degree in
Communication Studies. Being plus size for the majority of her life
she has overcome many obstacles to finally come to the point where
she is fully content with herself and her life. This self love has
also allowed Ms Suga the privilege of sharing her love with those
around her. She is very passionate about life and loves to help
Ms Suga likes to see herself as the one everyone can go
to for positive, inspirational and truthful words of advice and/or
support. She is the Beautiful Inspirational Girl that is blessed,
intellectual, trustworthy, caring and hardworking.
Ms Suga has had a passion for writing since she was a
little girl when she used to think of short stories about what her
life would be like as she got older. This is Ms Suga’s first
opportunity for her thoughts to be public for the world to see.
Excited about this column Ms Suga is also very optimistic of her
future in writing and promoting self love and acceptance in the plus
Stir it Up!
with Ms Suga
How does the old saying go? When life gives you lemons...do
what? Well lemonade is all well & good but how about you cut
that sucker up, get you a bottle of tequila, some salt a few
friends & have a night of body shots! Wow, I think that was a
little extra even for me but sometimes it bees (yes bees) like
that. Sometimes you just gotta "stir the pot."
I read a quote one day that read "Life is 10% what happens to
you the other 90% is what you do about it!" Makes sense right?
Think back on all your best and worst memories, what happened?
Don't you remember you spent that night in jail because of that
stupid thing you did. That failed class because all you did was
party & bullsh** (in my Notorious BIG voice). Or do you remember
graduating with honors inspire of the failed class? What I'm
saying is you are more likely to remember what you did before
you remember what was done to you regardless If it's good or
So what about when things get boring? When life seems to be one
mundane routine after the next, what do you do? You take body
shots! Ok… body shots are a metaphor but you get the idea. For
the past few weeks I have worked nearly 70 hours a week between
my 2 jobs. Not to mention I had no days off by day 12 I was
deliriously worn out and I still had 3 days left to go. If I was
gonna survive the madness I had to make something happen or
collapse...I had to stir it up. So I got me some of those Katie
Perry lashes, put on some outrageously bright lipstick and some
stupidly big earrings (like the earrings I usually wear aren't
big but you get the picture) and jazzed myself up as much as I
could and still be within dress code at work. Now it wasn't as
drastic as body shots but it did the trick. My customers would
be so caught up in my earrings and lashes I was able to take a
step back and work at a calmer pace. Don't get me wrong I was
still busy as hell but when I stirred the pot it gave me a
little boost to keep going.
So I encourage you to stir your hypothetical pot a bit. Bored
with your workout routine? Take a class instead, go in the
morning before work instead of after work, and change your
playlist. Tired of school and writing paper after paper after
paper? Go for the extra credit; add a picture to the cover
sheet. Go do your homework in the park. Here's a thought how
about you TAKE A BREAK! Get out the house for an hour or so. If
you’re stuck wasting away in a cubical, take 5 minutes and run
up the stairs then back down to your desk. Do whatever it takes
to shake things up (within reason of course. Don't try shaking
it up but taking shots before work).
All I'm saying is don't let this world of work and bills and
life keep you from being happy. I encourage you to stir the pot
because at the end of it all 90% if your life is yours to
Until next time!
Live, Laugh, Love, Inspire
Kathy is originally from a small town in Michigan but has lived in
San Diego County since she's been 18 years old. Kathy
graduated from San Diego State University with a Bachelors in
Finance in 1999.
She has a real estate broker’s license and works as a mortgage
Kathy also owns BBW Club Catalina in San Diego which has monthly
night club parties and other fun events on a frequent basis.Kathy has been an avid supporter of NAAFA, Vegas BBW Bash and
San Diego BBW Bash and believes in size acceptance and health at
Kathy is a firm believer that people need to have a full life by
going to the movies, dinner, bowling, dancing and anything that will
make them a happier person and not wait till they are at the perfect
size to start living their life to the fullest.
Kathy is in her mid-40's and her children are grown and living
productively on their own.In her spare time she likes trying new restaurants, dancing,
modeling, bowling and spending time with family and friends.
Getting over your Ex
When you have been in a serious relationship and you thought it
was going to lead to a lifetime with that person, then moving on
and getting over your ex can be pretty hard. I have
two friends right now that are having such a difficult time
letting go of something they know wasn't a healthy relationship
in their heads, but their hearts are still very much in love
with these men.
I think everyone needs time to think about what went wrong in a
relationship, and possible things that could have been done to
save the relationship. There also comes a time when
you need to stop thinking about the past, and concentrate on the
future. It is almost painful to see friends post 2
to 5 times a day how much they miss this person, or the angry
posts about how betrayed they feel, and I know that venting
anger and frustration is something we all need to do.
Let's talk about some positive ways to get over your ex and look
for a brighter future for yourself.
1. Stop all communication with your ex.... that means no e
mails, texts, phone calls or tweets.
2. Stop glamorizing all of your past great memories of your ex
and don't forget all the bad times that were the reason for the
3. Stop talking to your ex's friends because that is a direct
link to him and talking about how his life is going
4. Clean house--- get rid of anything and everything that was a
gift or reminds you of your ex.
5. Don't try to get your stuff back from the ex or gifts you
gave to the ex... these items will just remind you of your ex
even more because they were at his place.
6. Hang out with your friends, family, focus on your kids but
don't spend this time talking about your ex.
7. Take a vacation, take a class, try something you have always
wanted to do but do not sit at home with a tub of Ben & Jerry's
8. Go out on some dates and let the dates know that it will be
a PG13 date because you just got out of a long term relationship
and you want the foundation of any new relationship to start at
a solid friendship.
9. Make sure the next guy you date is an upgrade from your
ex....make a list of things that you need and want in a
relationship... rule of thumb is if you have 10 things on a list
that the new man should fulfill at least 8 of those things
because we don't need 100% but at least 80% to make sure we are
10. Do not feel sorry for yourself because this will probably
lead to depression.. think about it as have a new and bright
future where you can do anything you want.
11. Put yourself first and make yourself a priority because
when we make ourselves a priority than people will too!!
Celebrating almost two decades as a Graphic Designer/Published
Illustrator, Jean Nerestant Jr (Jness) got his start as a graphic
artist in 1994, Still working as a graphic designer by day/ Jness
devotes time to his hip hop Culture, comic book art and Plus
One thing I have learned in forty something odd years of
living is that life is richly and abundantly saturated with
challenges that seem to be tailor made for the purpose of
testing character and moral integrity. With that being said, I
am sure that many of you might agree with that theory. Then if
that is the true purpose of life’s mountains and valleys, we
have to strive for that bitter sweet spot of righteous
unwavering character. This is the very virtue that greatness is
gleaned from. As complicated as an individual’s life can be, my
careful review has lead me to believe that there are two ways to
walk through life, with your head up or with your head down.
When you choose one of these methods of walking through
life several things happen. The first thing that either posture
can affect is how you feel about yourself. Walking with your
head down makes your outlook one of defeat. For example a track
runner would have a difficult time gaging a rapidly approaching
hurdle with their head down.
When attempting to clear obstacles, it is better to keep your
head up, because it makes a statement of confidence to every
onlooker and challenger. Hence the second thing that is affected
by your posture, the way you are perceived by others. Keep your
head up. In reality every runner can’t win the race but, how it
was run, and how you finish makes you a winner and a force to be
This month’s new illustration features a fashionable curvy
beauty, and diva in the making. This piece is called CONFIDENCE.
It makes reference to, how a person feels, how they want to be
received, and most importantly who they are. Dress your best, be
your best, show you’re very best, and don’t yield to every
invitation that comes your way to distract you. You are far too
valuable for that, Big, with much more to offer, beautiful in so
many ways and ready for the world. You are poised for the
challenge and confident of what the outcome will be.
LargeInCharge Hopes that you enjoyed this article.
Our writer and artistic contributor JNess will be taking a
so please enjoy his previous artwork and writing in
Hello there all my fashion loving friends. My name is Amy Lucas and
in this column I hope to bring you some new outfits that will make
you feel great and be Large and In Charge.
My whole life has not been devoted to fashion as my background is in
teaching Spanish, Math, and Science. I also have a master’s degree
in Central Office Administration.
With that said, I have been wearing
plus sizes for as long as I can remember so I do know the struggles we all
face to find cute clothes. I come from a smaller town in Michigan, which
means I have an even harder time finding plus size clothing in my area
since the choices are so limited; as well as, the sizes and styles each
Out of necessity, I started looking
online instead of just settling for the places here and have found that
other women could use the help too. I run a fashion group on Facebook
called BBW Fashion where I post something fabulous each day hoping to help
all those to find what they want in their size.
In my career, I've helped plus size
students and their parents to find fashion in their sizes that would help
them with their self-esteem and make them feel good about themselves. I
have also dabbled in fashion before this modeling for three different
stores, winning a cover model spot in July of 2012 in Large in Charge
magazine, and I was Ms. LBC 2008 for Linda's Big Connections in Chicago. I
look forward to showing you what is available in plus size fashion and
help you to look even more beautiful and chic.
Halloween Costumes - 14 Complete Looks!
with Amy Lucas
Halloween is coming around the corner and that means there will
be lots of Halloween parties and balls to attend whether you are
at a BBW event or at home. Costumes in plus sizes are not so
easy to find especially in the larger sizes, but there are great
costumes online or some you can even put together with fun
accessories, shoes, and makeup. There are even sites that offer
costumes in different lengths and colors. You can also make a
dress longer by throwing on some leggings, tights, or add a
petticoat to add a few inches to the bottom of the dress.
Burlesque Babe Costume by In Character Costumes,
includes everything on the model except the shoes,
Jay Hansen and Heidi Davis are size-acceptance advocates from Oklahoma and
co-own Oklahoma's only social size-acceptance group,
Oklahoma BBW, BHM, and their
Admirers. Heidi was born in 1969 and has been a large woman her whole
life, just as Jay has been an admirer of such plus-sized women all of his.
Heidi graduated High School in 1987, which is the same year Jay was born.
The two met online in 2005 and quickly developed a friendship. In 2009,
Jay graduated the University of Central Oklahoma with a Bachelor’s in
English Education, and the following year he and Heidi started dating and
quickly fell deeply in love.
Heidi is experienced, blunt, pragmatic, down-to-earth, and strong in every
sense of the word, while Jay is intellectual, articulate, ideological,
contemplative, and gentle. Heidi is eighteen years Jay's senior and nearly
three times his weight, while Jay is 140 pounds soaking wet with a brick
in his pocket. He's a king amongst nerds and all things geeky; she's a
tattooed, rough-and-tumble, hard rocker to her core. Together, they are a
beautiful personification of the old adage
"The Skinny on Big Love with Jay Hansen" was started in 2013 with Jay as
the primary writer and Heidi as his muse and endless source of ideas and
inspiration. Together, the two hope to provide people with a new frame of
mind on love and relationships, promote open-mindedness and acceptance,
ask intriguing questions, foster conversations, and prove to the world
that titles such as weight and age, amongst countless others, should never
stand in the way of one's pursuit of happiness.
Big, Beautiful Worries
with Jay Hansen
Video: P!ink's - Just Give Me a Reason
The other day someone called into a local radio station and requested
P!nk's "Just Give Me A Reason."
When the DJ asked why, the girl said
"because all relationships have their more hopeless person that can't help
but imagine and assume the worst from the tiniest of happenings, and
that's what makes this song so brilliant."
Two months ago, I wrote about some of the biggest, most unfortunately
common vices encountered in the fat admirer community; infidelity and fear
of social judgment for being in a serious relationship with a larger
woman. These two issues are obviously catastrophic for any relationship,
but there's another destructive, albeit much more subtle, force
all-too-often found among plus-sized women - paranoia and distrust. I
understand that it is because of the prevalent problems among fat admirers
combined with the constant social pressures and bullying plus-sized women
face that they have a hard time trusting others, but coming from the
perspective of a fat admirer that's proud to be in a mutually respectful
and loyal relationship with a woman much larger than himself regardless of
what others may think, I can say that issues of trust and paranoia do much
more damage to me and Heidi's relationship than anything else.
Like I said in my previous article, big women make unfortunately easy
targets for sleazy, lecherous men because society does the dirty work for
them of wearing down their self-esteem and self-worth. This is why
patience and understanding are extremely important for fat admirers, and
our relationship is no exception. Literally every serious relationship
Heidi has ever been in, including two marriages, ended because she was
cheated on. Because of this, even though I've personally given her little
reason to, Heidi sometimes has trouble trusting me and her head runs wild
with the worst possible assumptions on a hair-trigger. For example, I'm
obviously a writer, and I enjoy writing a lot, but I've never been able to
write while someone reads over my shoulder (I think most writers feel the
same), so whenever Heidi tries to read what I'm writing while I'm writing
it I stop and get "twitchy" and unnerved. The moment she feels me tense
up, Heidi's emotions automatically assume that
I'm doing something wrong and
gets upset, even though she's the one trying to read over my shoulder. The
same goes for when I'm trying to read e-mails, talk to my friends, or do
anything on the computer at all. BBW events and parties are even worse for
her because she gets extremely upset if I am so much as in a picture with
another woman, even though taking pictures at group events is one of my
primary responsibilities as co-owner of Oklahoma BBW.
In addition to personal experiences, I also went out and did some research
for this column to help further explain the irrationality of paranoia. The
results I found were extremely varied because there's just no reliable way
to measure such statistics, so my conclusions had to be general and
loosely based. The first thing I wanted to know was if there were any
significant statistics on what percentage of men cheat. They ranged from
General Social Survey) to 34% (The
Sun... so take it with a huge grain of salt) of all men. That's
just over one-third at the worst, just under one-eighth at best. I then
juxtaposed these numbers with what mainstream culture considers one of the
most feared and serious "red flags" of cheating; pornography consumption.
For 18-25 year olds at least (my age bracket), the numbers of men who
watch pornography ranged from 88% (University
of Copenhagen study) to, no joke, 100% (University
of Montreal study). So by taking the worst-case scenario
numbers for cheating (34%), and best-case numbers for pornography (88%),
that's a difference of 54%, which means even assuming the worst possible
statistics I could find a majority of men watch pornography and don't
cheat on their partners.
Letting yourself get so upset over such minor things is the definition of
paranoia. When you express paranoia, be it vocally or emotionally, you're
accusing your partner of wrongdoing, and when you experience paranoia,
you're revealing an underlying problem with trust. I can speak from first
hand experience that being accused of wrongdoing for the simplest of
day-to-day activities like reading e-mail, or finding out that your
partner has a fundamental lack of trust in you, is very hurtful. Heidi is
well aware of the irrationality of her paranoia and tries to keep her
emotions under control the best she can, but even now after three years of
our relationship and eight years of friendship, every now and then, it
bubbles up to the surface and I try to be as understanding and
accommodating as possible.
I'm not saying you should ignore warning signs of infidelity at all. My
previous column from July listed several of those warning signs for which
you should be on the lookout. I hesitated to even write most of this
article out of fear that I may appear to be defending questionable men, so
let me be clear; if you rationally suspect something, by all means do
something. My point is, though, that going to a relational DEFCON 1 at a
single, benign sign from an otherwise completely loyal and honest partner
could be just as detrimental to the happiness and wellbeing of your
relationship as the hypothetical cheating for which you're on the lookout
and trying to prevent. Always remember to keep your emotions in check with
sound reasoning and logic, otherwise your imagination could run away with
your past experiences and present observations to ruin your chances at an
honest and healthy relationship.
I was born in San Diego,
California on August 30, 1972.br> Grew up in
San Jose, San Francisco, and San Diego California.
I Graduated from San Diego State University in
1996 with a Bachelors Degree in Journalism
(Radio-TV News) and a Bachelors Degree in
I interned with U.S.
Senator Dianne Feinstein from 1995-1996.
interned with CBS News during the 1996 Republican
Currently I'm a
Licensed Sales Representative with Pacific Shores
Real Estate, Inc. in Solana Beach, California
I'm Co-Owner of Club Catalina BBW Night Club
in San Diego, CA.
And a newlywed, married
to Kathy Edmondson as of December 31, 2012.
I am the father of one daughter - Safiyah
Edmondson (8) and stepfather to two young men,
Alexander Hernandez (22) and John Rhakman Macklin
I enjoy bowling, basketball, tennis,
football. I play 12 musical instruments. I also
design a web page for a real estate company.
with David Edmondson
a hard thing, trying to get that one defining moment out
of your head. A moment that will change the way you look
at everything for the rest of your life. That moment
came for me, when I held my daughter Safiyah for the
first time. There I was fighting to get a glimpse of her
as the doctors and nurses were checking on her a few
minutes after birth. Then, holding her little body in my
arms and having her look at me for the first time. All
of those dreams of living life on the wild side were now
placed on hold, because protecting her (As Chris Rock
stated “Keep your daughter off the pole”.) became my
first and only concern.Now, nearly 9 years later, I see her growing up
and I have come to the realization that…………..Yep, you
are officially OLD.
Being a parent is a difficult job to begin
with. There is a ton of sacrifice that must take place.
You have to check your ego at the door, because the
things that may matter to you may not necessarily
correlate to what your child believes or how they think
of the world around them.It becomes even more challenging when you are not
living with your child on a daily basis.You have to find balance with your child’s needs
and then trying to have a life of your own.For most women, that means they sacrifice their
happiness for their child’s sake. That is where dating
and every other form of social activity, takes a back
seat to being your child’s protector, supporter,
provider and number one fan.I remember that five year period, where if
someone asked me if I was dating anyone special, I
honestly couldn’t tell them what dating was, because my
only concern was: dropping Safiyah off at preschool,
going to work, leaving work, picking Safiyah up, making
sure her homework was done, eating dinner, and reading
to her at night before tucking her in.
Sadly, when a father is doing his basic
defined duties, he is celebrated as father of the year
in most people’s eyes; when there have been mother’s,
whom have played the role of both parents, for years. Thus, we
shouldn’t get any rewards for doing what we are supposed
to be doing. The rewards are internal. Seeing your child
smile at you every day or getting that hug from them,
this makes up for all the tough times.
Yes, there are times when I wonder, will my
size prevent me from sharing those special moments in my
daughter’s life. But size doesn’t limit the make believe
tea parties she has me attend. Nor does it stop me from
taking her to amusement parks or attending her recitals.
We are father’s not physical fitness coaches or world
class athletes. In reality, is anyone going to care
about your size, when you are cheering your child at the
soccer match or the little league baseball game?NO! The only thing that matters or that your
child is going to remember is that you were there to
support them. In the end, that is the number one
requirement of being a father……….TIME.
between father’s that are revered and those who are
negatively looked upon is that they know how to manage
the time they have with their kids. They will not let
obstacles, such as a bad relationship with their ex,
work or social status stop them, because they know that
the most precious time of their lives, is spent being
with their child.